It was a smashing success last year so I'm bringing it back again, it is....
The Riffs And Raffs Rock And Metal (And Maybe Some Pop) Awards!
Since this is the second time I'm doing this, there'll be similarities and differences between the RARRAMAMSPAs from 2018. Namely, the award categories will contain a blend of old and new, as some categories may not apply as effectively to the last year's music. Once again, I feel it's necessary to remind you that these awards aren't meant to be taken seriously (just like every single awards show in the history of awards shows, yada yada yada) and that my opinion on albums I rate highly in this post might change throughout the course of the year.
With that in mind, let's celebrate a slight improvement over 2017's musical banquet!
The "Boston Zeppelin Through The Night" Award for
BEST ROCK ALBUM
The album I valued the most that belonged to the Rock genre, including various subgenres such as Southern Rock, Hard Rock and Shoegazing. It does NOT include Metal, Pop and their subgenres.
And the nominees are...
Prequelle - Ghost
Living The Dream - Slash, feat. Myles Kennedy & The Conspirators
Used Future - The Sword
Living The Dream - Uriah Heep
And the winner is...
Prequelle - Ghost for being the single greatest album I've listened to in a long, long time. Some may call this a Metal album but to me, it rides the line between Rock and Metal in a way that can include the better aspects of both genres...hence, it counts!
The "Screaming For Powerslave In Peace" Award for
BEST METAL ALBUM
The album I valued the most that belonged to the Metal genre, including various subgenres such as Hair Metal and that's about it. It does NOT include Rock, Pop and their subgenres.
And the nominees are...
Firepower - Judas Priest
Thunderbolt - Saxon
The Sacrament Of Sin - Powerwolf
Used Future - The Sword
And the winner is...
Prequelle - Ghost for being the SINGLE GREATEST ALBUM I've listened to in a long, long time that contains aspects of Rock AND Metal so fuck you, it wins this one as well. Go listen to Prequelle and tell me I'm wrong. If I had to pick one from the list above to win, I guess it'd be The Sacrament Of Sin - Powerwolf for being a very close runner-up though.
The "Sgt. Pepper's Thriller Sounds" Award for
BEST POP ALBUM
The album I valued the most that belonged to the Pop genre. Pop albums may contain songs with a Rock twist or be recorded by Rock bands so long as it's very clearly a Pop album.
And the nominees are...
Simulation Theory - Muse
Attention Attention - Shinedown
Some Generic Noise - A Sexy Glistening Womanhole
Breathy Acoustic Moaning - A Sexy Pouty Manboy
And the winner is...
Well it's fucking Prequelle - Ghost, isn't it? Who cares about Pop albums on this blog, fact of the matter is Prequelle was the best album of the year. It was so good that an album traversing three different musical genres deserves three separate awards for doing them so perfectly. Out of the albums on the list above, I guess Attention Attention - Shinedown is the best although it really stretches the definition of Pop. Then again, so does Prequelle so feel free to give your own personal award to whichever you think deserves it the most although if it's not Prequelle, I'll be very disappointed.
The "Generation Lulu Or Bust" Award for
MOST PATHETIC ALBUM
The album that could've been decent (or maybe even great) if the band got their shit together and one or more members didn't absolutely phone it in. It's anyone's game in the genre department and once again, you're in the wrong part of the Internet if you want to read about Pop.
And the nominees are...
Simulation Theory - Muse
Post-Apocalypto - Tenacious D
Anthem Of The Peaceful Army - Greta Van Fleet
The Music Made Me Do It - Ted Nugent
And the winner is...
Post-Apocalypto - Tenacious D, hands down. Greta Van Fleet have only released EPs so a disappointing first album isn't quite as pathetic as a fourth record by a band who very clearly rushed the songwriting process to whack something out before the end of the year. The same can be said for Muse, a band familiar with releasing poor albums, and Ted Nugent, an artist who hasn't fallen from the mountain of grace so much as tumbled off a footstool. Mind you, Ted Nugent was very close to winning this one if not for Tenacious D's utter failure.
The "Tyranny And Caress Of Miracles" Award for
MOST UNDERRATED ALBUM OF LAST YEAR
The album from 2017 that deserved some love in last year's RARRAMAMSPAs but took me an entire year to realise it. Rock and Metal albums only in this post, as I don't think any Pop albums are underrated (especially not modern ones).
And the nominees are...
The Mission - Styx
About Time - Horisont
The Knight Of Rebellion - Dream Troll
From The Fires - Greta Van Fleet
And the winner is...
About Time - Horisont. Maybe if Anthem Of The Peaceful Army wasn't so mediocre, From The Fires would've taken this win. However, an album that immediately grabbed me and encouraged me to check out more of the band is definitely one that should've been featured in last year's blog post...although it still probably would've lost to Pinewood Smile - The Darkness.
Now onto the awards for musical moments!
The "Planet Classic Blabbermouth" Award for
BEST NEWS STORY
This award goes to the news story that I'm most proud of bringing to you. The story that I think has the best details and most imaginative series of events that totally happened.
And the nominees are...
Bruce Springsteen Finishes 148 Hour Concert
Kirk Hammett To Face Pedal Abuse Charges
Led Zeppelin Are Not Touring Or Recording New Music
K.K. Downing "Still Upset" Over Starbucks Argument
And the winner is...
Led Zeppelin Are Not Touring Or Recording New Music. I like all of these articles but every time I see a tweet about Jimmy Page's new interview or something like that, I'm always reminded of this universal, evergreen article. The Bruce Springsteen one is a close second, mind.
The "Number Of Flames With Rock Of The Night" Award for
BEST RIFF
This award goes to the song with the most awesome riff played on guitar in 2018. Any songs from the Rock, Metal and Pop genre are eligible although let's face it, Pop ain't winning no riff competition. As for which riffs I'm counting (as many great Rock songs feature at least 3 distinguishable riffs), I'm mostly looking for riffs that carry the song's main melody rather than decent ones used sporadically throughout the track
And the nominees are...
"Firepower" - Judas Priest
"Dance Macabre" - Ghost
"Fire And Forgive" - Powerwolf
"Rats" - Ghost
And the winner is...
"Rats" - Ghost. They are REALLY cleaning up tonight, huh.
And finally
The "Master Of Sex Magik...But Who's Buying" Award for
PEOPLE'S FAVOURITE BLOG POST
This award goes to the Riffs And Raffs blog post written/posted in 2018 that had the most views, even if it wasn't my personal favourite or even best piece of writing. Yes, this award might be a little self-congratulatory but fuck it, this is my BBQ so I get to choose the meat.
And the winner is...
Rapid Fire: Motorhead, David Bowie, Tom Petty with 3097 views!
Again, most (if not all) of these are probably bot/spam so if I had to guess, the post with the most actual views is probably this one after I asked people to read it on Twitter. Anyway, numbers!!
Before I finish up, I just wanted to say a few final words regarding blog post plans for the upcoming year.
Over the last couple of years, I set myself the challenge of writing at least one blog post a week (or an equivalent average) to keep my mind focused and my writing talents alive. However, fans of this blog will probably know that most of the blog posts I submitted in 2018 were all done in the last week of the month, hastily typed up just to meet the quota for the year. This was mostly because I was busy with other commitments but I also think it's because I didn't really have a lot to write about towards the end of the year, particularly when Rock/Metal news stories died down and album releases weren't as common.
As a result, I've decided to reduce the amount I'll be posting on this blog.
Don't worry, I'M NOT STOPPING!
I still intend to post album reviews, periodic Here Is The News satire pieces and everything else I usually write. I just won't be posting them as often. There are two main reasons for my decision:
Firstly, whilst I still enjoy writing certain blog posts, I felt that rushing out four posts in a week because I'd left it so late due to lack of inspiration throughout the month didn't result in quality writing. Sure, some of the posts were great but towards the end of the year, I felt like I was scraping the barrel a little. I'd rather write a blog post that I'm proud of after a brilliant idea comes to me than whack out filler posts for the sake of it.
Secondly, people close to me know that I want to get into screenwriting as a profession and I've always told myself that until I can actually get my shit together, writing blog posts helps me improve and keeps me actively doing the thing I want to do for a living. Unfortunately, after some introspection, I feel like I've been using that as an excuse to not pursue my dream. I've set myself the goal of actually writing and submitting a proper script this year (which is coming along nicely, by the way) so I'd rather dedicate my writing energy to that over a series of blog posts about which songs I like in Guitar Hero/Rock Band games.
As I said up above, I WILL STILL BE SUBMITTING BLOG POSTS THROUGHOUT THE YEAR although I'm not going to put a number on exactly how many I intend to write or when I intend to write them. In the meantime, if you want to hear me casually talk about music you can always follow me on Twitter (where I'll be sharing new blog posts) OR check out my Twitch streams where I play Clone Hero and other video games, frequently discussing music and other topics.
Well then, now that that's out of the way, let's try to enjoy 2019 before it's too late!
