Rapid Fire: King Crimson, Rob Zombie, Horisont

I know I said I was gonna do Living The Dream - Uriah Heep in a Rapid Fire post but that can wait; we've got three albums with spooky looking album covers to discuss, starting with this Proggy waste of time!

1. In The Court Of The Crimson King - King Crimson

I've always found this album cover to be kinda off-putting so it definitely belongs in this Rapid Fire post, especially if you imagine the contorted face of horror is reacting to a spooky ghost or something. I'll tell you something else as well; this album is NOT an easy find online. However, after searching for each song, I listened to the entire thing and can confirm that I absolutely wasted my time. This album is shit. It's worse than shit; it's long, drawn-out, pretentious, tedious, over-inflated, noisy shit. However, if there's one type of shit it isn't, it's pointless shit.
Whilst I despise every song on this godawful record, from wacky album opener "21st Century Schizoid Man" to horrific masturbation "The Court Of The Crimson King", it's a necessary evil in the world of music because this turd masquerading as "art" inspired a myriad of much greater albums and bands. Hell, it arguably created the Prog Rock genre; we have Yes, Genesis, The Moody Blues, Jethro Tull, Dream Theater, Rush, all manner of great bands who had the sense to realise you could make something long-winded and grand without sounding like something made when university students program laptop AI to make a 50 minute album.
This isn't one of those albums that you must listen to before you die; you get nothing out of it, presumably the reason why so many critics who should know better claim it's such a great album. If you don't feel anything, you're probably not getting it which means you're a stoopidhead so you better praise it to give yourself credibility. I wouldn't recommend In The Court Of The Emperor's New Clothes to anyone as it's nothing more than a misfire that happened to give us a great musical genre. If you do like this album, good for you. I don't think worse of you for liking this but nobody should think better of you either.

1. 21st Century Schizoid Man

2. I Talk To The Wind

3. Epitaph

4. Moonchild

5. The Court Of The Crimson King

ALBUM RATING - 1/10

2. Hellbilly Deluxe - Rob Zombie

This is probably more appropriate for a Halloween themed blog post, due to the deliberately scary album cover and music based off classic Horror films. This was Rob Zombie's first solo album after White Zombie and whilst the music still contains his typical sound of growling vocals, heavy riffs and thunderous percussion, Hellbilly Deluxe is definitely more of an Industrial record than Astro-Creep: 2000 or La Sexorcisto with more emphasis on synth-effects and repetitive structures than guitar solos and other traditional Rock aspects.

The album starts off with its three singles: "Superbeast", "Dragula" and "Living Dead Girl", immediately setting the tone and putting its best foot forwards with three completely different yet consistently heavy tracks. Once these have finished, the album continues to knock down doors with its fine-tuned, well-crafted Dance Metal but by the second half of the record, you'll notice some of the tracks start to drag a little (despite being under five minutes long). It's always the risk when writing an album containing variations on the same song over and over again but at least the song this album is based off is a good one.
Hellbilly Deluxe has some great songs all contained within the first half but the entire album is perfect for background noise, particularly at Halloween parties or similar environments. This is essentially Rob Zombie's shtick; heavy Industrial Metal without complexity featuring old Horror film audio snippets and growling vocals, each track carrying a name that sounds like a Goosebumps title or alcoholic beverage served exclusively at a bar where you have to cover your lid if you want to make it home that night. If you like that kind of music, you definitely won't hate this album although I think anyone would be hard-pressed to love it unless this music truly is their jam.

1. Call Of The Zombie

2. Superbeast

3. Dragula

4. Living Dead Girl

5. Perversion 99

6. Demonoid Phenomenon

7. Spookshow Baby

8. How To Make A Monster

9. Meet The Creeper

10. The Ballad Of Resurrection Joe And Rosa Whore

11. What Lurks On Channel X?

12. Return Of The Phantom Stranger

13. The Beginning Of The End

ALBUM RATING - 6/10

3. About Time - Horisont

You might see this album cover and think this is a NWOTHM album containing music similar to Iron Maiden and Anthrax but you'd be dead wrong! Despite having a somewhat creepy looking cover, it's actually a modern album by a Swedish group inspired by 70s bands such as Thin Lizzy, UFO, Rory Gallagher and Blue Oyster Cult. The album's relatively easy going despite containing such a striking cover but even though they arguably stumbled at the very first hurdle, the rest of the record is a fantastic listen.

Album opener "The Hive" starts off a bit slow and gentle for a Rock album but when it gets going, my God does it get going. Great riffs, awesome vocals and perfect use of electric piano accompaniment to give us a top quality tune (even if it does rip-off "MacArthur Park" at one point in the solo). From there, the album pumps out great music that resembles an army of Frankenstein's monsters from 70s Rock bands, ready to get your foot stomping and head nodding. We get softer songs with an acoustic flair that break into something faster paced ("Letare"), fun tracks that blend the grand riffing of Queen with the galloping rhythm of Eddie Money ("Boston Gold") and a longer, more progressive title track that brings the album to a quiet close.
Recently, I criticised the Greta Van Fleet debut for sounding like a poor attempt at copying the Led Zeppelin sound. The difference between an album like Anthem Of The Peaceful Army and About Time can be summarised by this quote from Wilson Mizner: "If you steal from one author, it's plagiarism. If you steal from many, it's research". Greta Van Fleet's music was entirely driven by skin-deep comparisons to one band whereas Horisont have taken the best aspects of a whole variety of artists to craft something that sounds distinctly theirs. I definitely recommend this album to fans of Classic Rock, although don't expect anything as heavy as Deep Purple, Led Zeppelin or the like. It still rocks but not enough to bring the house down; just a couple of loose pictures here & there.

1. The Hive

2. Electrical

3. Without Warning

4. Letare

5. Night Line

6. Point Of Return

7. Boston Gold

8. Hungry Love

9. Dark Sides

10. About Time

ALBUM RATING - 8/10

COMING SOON: Posts about the music from Spyro The Dragon...and maybe The Police.

Rapid Fire: Black Stone Cherry, The Offspring, Foo Fighters

Recently, I went to visit family and had to spend five hours driving from my house to theirs. Before setting off, I grabbed three CDs from my collection that I hadn't listened to for the car journey and once I arrived, decided to write a blog post discussing each album. So yeah, that's the theme for this month's Rapid Fire post. Not genres, not decades, just three albums I listened to whilst travelling alone on the motorway.


1. Magic Mountain - Black Stone Cherry

The first album I listened to was easily the best although don't mistake that for me saying it was a great album overall. Magic Mountain has some decent Hard Rock tracks but more often than not, the songs were built on uninspired riffs and generic Black Stone Cherry material. Album opener "Holding On...To Letting Go" starts off with a great rhythm and some decent riffing but regrettably the band make their classic mistake of letting things slow down for no good reason in the middle. It's a shame too as the guitar solo's pretty good, although changing the rhythm in the middle of a song by slowing it down rarely ever works unless you're a Prog Metal band and even then, it's never worth it.
The slower sections of the album come in the form of drug themed tracks such as "Peace Pipe", "Me And Mary Jane" and "Blow My Mind". Similar to some of the material off the latest albums by The Sword, I get the impression that the chilled, Southern Groove behind each of these songs sounds better when 'blazing up' as all the hip kids say. Since I was behind the wheel at the time of listening to these tracks, I can't confirm or deny that theory but what I can confirm is that unlike other Black Stone Cherry albums I've listened to, this album has songs I would love to listen to again such as 70s throwback and title track "Magic Mountain" and emotionally charged album closer "Remember Me", even if it does go on way too long.
The stronger aspects of the record, as always, are the dynamic riffs and heavy grooves whereas I felt myself tuning out during the slower, whinier numbers ("Sometimes") and gimmicky filler tracks straight outta shit-kicker, cousin-fucker county ("Hollywood In Kentucky"). All in all though, it's a complete album that didn't feel like it was playing it too safe or recycling material (unlike another album I'll be discussing lower down). I recommend Magic Mountain to fans of Hard/Southern Rock although don't set your standards too high.

1. Holding On...To Letting Go

2. Peace Pipe

3. Bad Luck & Hard Love

4. Me And Mary Jane

5. Runaway

6. Magic Mountain

7. Never Surrender

8. Blow My Mind

9. Sometimes

10. Fiesta Del Fuego

11. Dance Girl

12. Hollywood In Kentucky

13. Remember Me

ALBUM RATING - 6/10

Next up is an album by Pop Punk champions The Offspring!

2. Americana - The Offspring

Don't let the album artwork fool you; this album isn't even the remotest bit interesting. Released in 1998 and after the band's much better albums Smash and Ixnay On The Hombre (not to mention before Conspiracy Of One, also a better album), Americana is supposed to be the band's statement on life in America from the band's youthful perspective but ends up sounding like weaker versions of material we've already heard before. Album opener "Welcome/Have You Ever" has the same rhythm, the same guitarwork and the same basic vocal structure as your typical Offspring track only it lacks that special spark. Possibly because the band try to add more progressive elements to their aggressive Pop Punk and it simply doesn't work.

Whilst there are some instances of tracks working perfectly as they are ("The Kids Aren't Alright", "Staring At The Sun"), the majority of songs on the album trip and fall over themselves. For example, lead single "Pretty Fly (For A White Guy)" has an amazing chorus and some fine guitar/vocal work, not to mention decent Latin influences. Unfortunately, it's ruined by the obnoxious "GIVVIT TO ME BAY-BEEEE, UH-HUH UH-HUH" throughout. If that vocal melody was played on guitar instead, this would've been an album highlight. There's also album closer "Pay The Man", a song originally intended to be on the previous album but was left off because they felt like it didn't belong. That was a smart decision, unlike the decision to make it eight-minutes long and easily forgettable. That was a dumb decision.

Ultimately, you'll probably enjoy this album if you haven't heard their previous work, similar to how you probably think Die Hard 4.0 is awesome if you haven't seen the first or second one. Americana is surplus goods and the Pop Punk filler tracks are old news at this point. Even the singles are dull or flawed to the point that they're not enjoyable (apart from "The Kids Aren't Alright"). You don't really stand to gain anything from listening to this entire album that you couldn't get elsewhere and the fact that the band's next album moved towards more conventional Rock than their brand of Skater Punk tells you that at least one member of the band felt like Americana showed warning signs of the band going stale.

1. Welcome

2. How Are You

3. Staring At The Sun

4. Pretty Fly (For A White Guy)

5. The Kids Aren't Alright

6. Feelings

7. She's Got Issues

8. Walla Walla

9. The End Of The Line

10. No Brakes

11. Why Don't You Get A Job

12. Americana

13. Pay The Man

14. Pretty Fly (Reprise)

ALBUM RATING - 3/10

And last but certainly least, we have Dave Grohl "experimenting"!

3. There Is Nothing Left To Lose - Foo Fighters

I fucking hate this album. It's generic, depressing, repetitive and possibly worst of all, it feels like Dave Grohl knew exactly what he was doing. The first three songs are completely different to the rest of the album and unsurprisingly, those three songs are the ones that are (semi) popular Foos tracks. Album opener "Stacked Actors" sports a great riff, an explosive chorus, a decent guitar solo and some classic Grohl vocals. Following close behind is "Breakout", another proper Rock song with Dave letting loose throughout. However, once we reach "Learn To Fly", a mediocre but passable radio friendly song designed to sound as commercial as possible, everything goes downhill.

The rest of the album contains guitar riffs that sound like they were written in about 10 seconds ("Live-In Skin", "Headwires"), percussion that would nudge coma patients onto the next mortal plain of existence ("Ain't It The Life", "Aurora") and vocals with all the energy and passion of an insurance salesman humming TV ad jingles whilst waiting for a bus ("M.I.A.", "Next Year"). It's almost as if Grohl didn't have much confidence in what he was doing so decided to start the album off with his three favourite songs so that people would hear the first few tracks and mistake There's Nothing Left To Lose for a Rock album.

This is the kind of album I'd imagine pretentious, hipster douches listening to because of how sensitive and non-threatening this "Rock" music is; your Zach Braffs, your Simon Neils, etc. If you're one of them, go knock yourselves out. Literally, knock yourselves out because your taste is awful and unwanted. Do not listen to this album, there are literally hundreds of better modern Rock records that don't sound phoned in or misleading. I've criticised Queens Of The Stone Age material due to how the mix of soft vocals and aggressively fuzzy guitar/bass tones does not work but I'll take Josh Homme's audio jizzrag over Dave Grohl's, if this album's anything to go by.

1. Stacked Actors

2. Breakout

3. Learn To Fly

4. Gimme Stitches

5. Generator

6. Aurora

7. Live-In Skin

8. Next Year

9. Headwires

10. Ain't It The Life

11. M.I.A.

ALBUM RATING - 2/10

COMING SOON: Tenology posts and more NEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWS.

Shout Out: Sweet Fanny Adams and Desolation Boulevard - Sweet

I know I said I'd be writing a Rapid Fire post but after a bit of thought, I decided to adapt it into a Shout Out post. But not just any Shout Out post, oh no. This time, it's a...
DOUBLE SHOUT OUT POST!
Yes, I couldn't decide which of these two brilliant albums to dedicate a post to so decided to write about both of them! First up, we have Sweet Fanny Adams, an album that's an essential listen for fans of 70s Hard Rock!

Most bands that choose to adapt their sound to appeal to a different audience tend to do so after about six albums. Not Sweet; they did it after just one. Not only that but they also changed their name from The Sweet to just Sweet. Granted there were three years in between the release of Funny How Sweet Co-Co Can Be and this record but the band also released some of their most popular singles in that time such as "Block Buster", "Little Willy" and of course "The Ballroom Blitz". These singles teased the band's transition from Bubblegum Pop to a heavier Glam Rock style of music but it wasn't until this album that the band begun to fully embrace Hard Rock...with a bit of Glam here and there.
Album opener "Set Me Free" was an explosive entrance onto the Rock scene, clearly taking influence from contemporaries at the time such as Deep Purple and The Who. The band only continued to keep things heavy with tracks such as "Rebel Rouser", a spiritual successor to "Hell Raiser", and title track "Sweet F.A.", a song with a heavy gallop and percussion throughout. Even the Glam infused tracks are heavier than your typical Top Of The Pops numbers with songs like "AC-DC" and "Into The Night" focusing more on raw vocals and rhythms than sing-a-longs and catchy riffs.
An important thing to remember whilst listening to this album is that it came out in 1974, around the time that Queen were just starting out (Queen II, which contained the complete version of "Seven Seas Of Rhye", was released just one month before Sweet Fanny Adams). Both bands pioneered vocal and guitar harmonies in Hard Rock although only Queen got the worldwide acclaim for their music. Whilst I think that Queen made better decisions over the course of their career and earned their fame through genuine talent, it's a shame that Sweet didn't even earn a fraction of their popularity despite being documented influences for Brian May's guitar work. What I'm trying to say is that Sweet Fanny Adams is a great album; highly underrated and one that I recommend to fans of 70s Rock.

1. Set Me Free

2. Heartbreak Tonight

3. No You Don't

4. Rebel Rouser

5. Peppermint Twist

6. Sweet F.A.

7. Restless

8. Into The Night

9. AC-DC

ALBUM RATING - 9/10

Of course I couldn't talk about Sweet Fanny Adams without also mentioning the follow-up album, Desolation Boulevard.

There are two versions of this album available, one released in 1974 in the UK and one released in 1975 in the US. The US version had a different tracklist, containing tracks off Sweet Fanny Adams and more radio-friendly versions of hit singles, whereas the UK version was 100% new and all Rock. I'm gonna be talking about the UK version. To say it was released literally in the same year as Sweet Fanny Adams, the fact that the album is clearly a different beast is impressive. Album opener "The Six Teens" showcases this with acoustic melodies paired with the electric guitar harmonies, not to mention the tempo changes later on. Sweet were back and in that short space of time between album releases, they'd learnt a thing or two!

The general songwriting quality is still great and contains a decent amount of variety, alternating between heavier Glam Rockers ("Turn It Down") and softer melodic numbers ("Lady Starlight"). However, there are three tracks that need singling out. First up is "Man With The Golden Arm", a cover of the theme by Elmer Bernstein that would be a great track if not for the five minute drum solo. It's ambitious but a little too masturbatory for me. Then there's a cover of "My Generation", the album closer that does a damn good job of recreating the energy and passion of The Who's original. Whilst the bass solos may not have the same appeal, the band still do a grand job of the song...up until it all goes to shit 50 seconds before the end.
Finally, there's the single-most important reason to listen to the album. "Fox On The Run". If you've heard this song before, chances are it was the rerecorded version for the 1975 version of this album; the one with synth and added backing vocal harmonies. This original version is more of a Hard Rock song with a much better guitar riff, TWO guitar solos, some fantastic percussion, raw vocals and great bass licks throughout. It's a shame that this version isn't more widely known as I would argue that it can go toe-to-toe with any of AC/DC's top songs. Whilst the 1975 album may have had a stronger tracklist due to the inclusion of multiple Sweet Fanny Adams songs, this album deserves a shoutout for the Hard Rock version of "Fox On The Run" alone. Now we just need an album with the full version of "Show Me The Way" too.

1. The Six Teens

2. Solid Gold Brass

3. Turn It Down

4. Medussa

5. Lady Starlight

6. Man With The Golden Arm

7. Fox On The Run

8. Breakdown

9. My Generation

ALBUM RATING - 6/10

Both albums are available as extended versions on Spotify and iTunes so you now have no excuse not to enjoy these cracking records!

Showdown: Back From The Dead - Spinal Tap

Last year, I wrote about Mock Rock band Tenacious D in a Rapid Fire post for April Fool's Day. Whilst I might be a week late, the first blog post for April will continue the celebration of Mock Rock by looking at a series of rerecords from 2009 by quite possibly the most famous and beloved Mock Rock band of all time; Spinal Tap.
This Is Spinal Tap is a classic mockumentary about the British Rock/Metal band Spinal Tap. It's also the name of the film's soundtrack and collection of most (if not all) of the band's memorable songs:

Yep, the famous black album cover from Smell The Glove is the album cover for the soundtrack, naturally. The soundtrack/album was released in 1984 (and a poorly received follow up album entitled Break Like The Wind was released eight years later, presumably to tie into an appearance on The Simpsons) but the aim of this post is to compare the classic original recordings with the rerecords off Back From The Dead, a 25th anniversary compilation album containing a few new tracks and fleshed out versions of tracks mentioned in the film like "Saucy Jack" and parts of the 20-minute free form "Jazz Odyssey".

However, I won't be talking about those new songs in this post. I'll just be looking at shared songs from both records. Also, no Spotify playlist for this post since it's just songs off the two albums rather than a compilation of various Rock/Metal/Pop covers that'd be harder to source.
So, time to turn it up to 11 and some other hacky reference from the film!

ROUND ONE: Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight
This Is Spinal Tap - I'm surprised this wasn't the 1984 record's album opener, considering how prominently it featured in the film. However, it's a fucking great track. It manages to blend awesome riffs with amusing vocals ("you're too young and I'm too well hung" is a line KISS were probably a year or two away from writing non-ironically). It's a shame the backing vocals are kinda shitty but hey, it's still a top notch song to listen to even if you didn't care for the film.
Back From The Dead - I guess Spinal Tap found a drummer as the percussion for this song is definitely better than the original. It also helps that the song's main riff still sounds awesome although I can't say the same for the vocals. Backing vocals from Nigel Tufnel (Christopher Guest) and Derek Smalls (Harry Shearer) are still too comical but sadly lead vocals from David St. Hubbins (Michael McKean) are a lot worse. It's almost like he's parodying his younger self which makes one of the few awesome Hard Rock songs on the album a little bit worse.
VERDICT - Got to give it to This Is Spinal Tap here. It might be a good rerecording overall with some small improvements but sadly the negatives outweigh the positives. If the vocals were identical in terms of silliness, it probably would've won.

ROUND TWO: (Funky) Sex Farm
This Is Spinal Tap - Wow, that opening riff stopped itself from being identical to the previous track, didn't it? Yeah, this is a fairly forgettable song from a Rock fan's perspective. Lyrically, it does a great job of lampooning forced metaphors and sexual language in Glam/Shock Rock but musically, there's something off about it. It sounds like one of those "shreds it" videos with riffs that sound incomplete or guitar harmonies that don't quite work.
Back From The Dead - So for some reason, the band decided to make this song sound less like a parody of bad Glam Rock and more like a parody of bad 70s Funk Rock, complete with added brass and softer guitar. I have to say, whilst I'm not a fan of the song, the corny Funk style definitely works better with the lyrics than the Rock style. I even prefer the brief Hip Hop interlude to the terrible guitar solo in the original.
VERDICT - Back From The Dead wins it for taking a chance and producing something that's still pretty poor but better as a parody track. I don't particularly like either but if I was forced to pick one to listen to again, it'd definitely be the rerecording.

ROUND THREE: Rock 'N' Roll Creation
This Is Spinal Tap - I guess this was their attempt at parodying Black Sabbath and other Heavy Metal/Hard Rock bands who use generic Biblical themes in their songs...it's OK, I guess. However, it needed to be taken a step further. It's not quite "bad" enough to be a good parody, if that makes sense? The lyrics needed to be just a bit more on-the-nose, although the music wasn't bad.
Back From The Dead - I actually quite like the music in this rerecord. They've amplified the better aspects (the chorus) and lessened the worse ones (guitar solos). Part of me would've liked to hear a version of this song where they actually changed the middle and made it sound more like an Arena Rock anthem than the original but at least this version isn't as bad.
VERDICT - It's another win for Back From The Dead for taking a mediocre parody and making it into a semi-decent song, although it still could've been improved with slightly more amusing lyrics.

ROUND FOUR: Gimme Some Money
This Is Spinal Tap - If I remember right, this is supposed to be one of Spinal Tap's earliest songs when they were a 60s guitar band like The Beatles or The Animals and God damn, it is fucking on point. It's lame, tepid Blues based "Rock" just like The Rolling Stones. It might not be a great song to listen to (unless you haven't heard Rock music before) but as a pastiche of Rock's early days, it's masterfully done.
Back From The Dead - A decent attempt at rerecording the original although the fact that it sounds so clean kind of works against it. The point of the song is to sound like a naff 60s Blues Rock track and this doesn't quite work. It would've been cool to hear a tarted up version of this track as a different period piece, like 90s Grunge or something. However, if you like the song, it's a great rendition of it.
VERDICT - Whilst the rerecording does have better sound quality, this is one of the few times where less is more. This Is Spinal Tap takes the win for being the perfect 60s Rock parody.

ROUND FIVE: Heavy Duty
This Is Spinal Tap - This is pretty damn close to Judas Priest for comfort! However, musically speaking, it's kind of plain with a poor mix. I don't remember this song from the film but I'm assuming it's supposed to showcase Nigel's guitar playing, as that takes centre-stage in this weak track. If the lead guitar tone was different, maybe I'd like the track more. As it stands, I'm not a huge fan.
Back From The Dead - Yeah, this is what I'm talking about. Better mix whilst retaining the better aspects of the track, plus some added keys from Keith Emerson during the solo. If I had to find flaws, I'd say that the vocals are a little too clear for a song that needs a grittier feel to it (and was previously ruined by the clean guitar in the original) but the track still works.
VERDICT - Another win for Back From The Dead. Could it be that Spinal Tap have pulled a Saxon and recorded a far greater collection of music 25 years after their original material?

ROUND SIX: America
This Is Spinal Tap - Songs about British bands travelling to America are a niche subject to parody and the film already covered the clashing of sensitive music with vulgar lyrics or themes with "Lick My Love Pump" (a song I would've loved to hear fleshed out as a precursor to Sensitive Axl Rose's material for 90s Guns N Roses albums) so I'm not really sure what purpose this song serves other than just a general Rock song. If that's the case, I guess it works. It's got some good riffs and great drumming, although it does sound a little like the band entered the studio after the first draft. A proper Rock band could've taken this material and done something great with it.
Back From The Dead - A relatively faithful rerecording but with far superior aspects; notice a theme emerging? Everything about this song is improved in the rerecording from the percussion to the passion of the vocals in the final verse. However, since they're rerecording the original material, it still suffers from sounding like they didn't do the necessary rewrites between verses to make crappier riffs sound better. At least this sounds like a good Alice Cooper song, unlike some of the originals.
VERDICT - I guess Spinal Tap really did resurrect what with all the wins Back From The Dead is getting!

ROUND SEVEN: (Listen To The) Flower People - Reggae Stylee
This Is Spinal Tap - Aaaaaand a perfect Psychedelic Rock parody from the late 60s now! It's almost scary how much I can imagine this song being used in some Vietnam flashback in a hacky action/comedy film with Seth Rogen and James Franco, if not for the lyrics...but I guess that's what makes the song work so spectacularly. If not for the forced Mozart riff, this would've been 10/10 on the Parodometer.
Back From The Dead - Remember how I said "Gimme Some Money" should've been rerecorded in a different style? Well, Spinal Tap did exactly that with this song! They rerecorded it as a Reggae song and once again, it works perfectly. The vocals are bang on the money and the music couldn't be better; if you were going to pick a new genre to mock with a song about the "Flower People", Reggae's a solid choice.
VERDICT - This is actually a really tough one. Both the original and rerecording do a spot on job of lampooning their respective genres so I'm going to have to give it to the song I preferred to listen to...which means This Is Spinal Tap gets the win because I will ALWAYS vote for Psychedelic Rock over Reggae.

ROUND EIGHT: Hell Hole
This Is Spinal Tap - This is one of few tracks Spinal Tap have released that could actually be a proper Rock song without being held back by silliness (which presumably explains why they made a music video for it). My biggest problem with Spinal Tap is that they're too far on the comedy side, meaning a lot of their music sounds like scrapings from the floor of Alice Cooper's recording studio. However, this song has a collection of great riffs, some ace backing vocals in the chorus and a sweet guitar solo. All in all, a strong song to start the original album.
Back From The Dead - A valiant effort but I guess the band were feeling a little insecure about this rerecording too, seeing as how it's been pushed way down the tracklist. At least the solo sounds great although none of that matters when you compare the backing vocals in this version to the original. Fuck me, they're terrible. Like, shite-awful. That alone is enough to give the win to This Is Spinal Tap.
VERDICT - Weren't you reading? This Is Spinal Tap get it for the superior backing vocals in the chorus and that alone, even though it has other positive attributes too.

ROUND NINE: Big Bottom
This Is Spinal Tap - A parody of bands that think they're lyrical wordsmiths when really they're talking out their arse, so to speak (once again, this film/soundtrack came out three years before Appetite For Destruction). Unfortunately, since its purpose is to showcase silly lyrics, the music is pretty dull and uninspired. So dull and uninspired that there's not much to say except it's a shame the percussion is the only thing lifting this song up.
Back From The Dead - Props to the band, they found a synth tone that was more comical than the one used in the original. At the end of the day though, it's still a dumb song that exists as a mediocre punchline. Whilst the elevated production values make the song quite amusing, it would've been funnier if they went even further with it. Imagining Def Leppard or even Michael Jackson level production values complete with 40-piece choir and orchestral accompaniments applied to a song called "Big Bottom" is funnier than what we got.
VERDICT - It's hard to say as both tracks are a bit shit so I'm giving it to This Is Spinal Tap for being a whole seven seconds shorter.

ROUND TEN: Stonehenge
This Is Spinal Tap - This is the song everyone knows, even if you haven't seen the film. It's also a perfect blend of funny lyrics and great music AND actually progresses the plot of the mockumentary in its own hilarious way. Whilst some lines ("No one knows who they were...or...what they were doin'") will always be funnier than others ("where the dew drops cry and the cats meow"), the highlight of this song is certainly the mandolin solo before the outro. It might get cut down in the film but hearing it fleshed out on the album is a real treat.
Back From The Dead - I think it's fair to say that I'm more familiar with this rerecording than the original due to my excessive playing of it on Rock Band but after comparing both, I definitely think this is the better version of the two. Tufnel's vocals in the intro sound perfectly clueless and the Rock elements are appropriately heavy. But hey, does the song master the mandolin solo? You bet your fucking arse it does. The original might be slightly more complex but the rerecording tightens up the imperfections into the perfect little melody. Fun fact: I learnt how to play this solo on the keyboard years ago. I doubt I can remember it now but it was still fun to play, even on a different instrument.
VERDICT - Back From The Dead, hands down.

ROUND ELEVEN: Cups And Cakes
This Is Spinal Tap - I really need to rewatch This Is Spinal Tap as I feel bad for being unable to remember any of these songs from the film. Anyway, it's a short little tune that's mostly strings. Probably not worth including on the soundtrack but here we are.
Back From The Dead - Oh...it got a rerecording too. That seems fair, I guess. It's basically the same as the original but with piano instead of strings so it makes sense to use as a fun little album closer, I suppose.
VERDICT - For the reason above, I'm giving it to Back From The Dead as it's the kind of song that would've been a hidden track on an album until digital distribution made those obsolete. It's a shame to end this Showdown post on such a meh song (especially after "Stonehenge") but that's the way the cupcake gets frosted!

FINAL SCORES:
This Is Spinal Tap - 5
Back From The Dead - 6

Well, there you have it. It's a close score but ultimately, Back From The Dead came out victorious! As for individual album ratings, I give This Is Spinal Tap a 6/10 (mostly for the parody aspect of it over musical quality) and Back From The Dead a 6/10 too, since there are a couple of new songs on it that I didn't discuss that are hit and miss. It's almost as if both albums are as good as each other and collectively, they come together to make the ultimate Spinal Tap album...you know, after Break Like The Wind, of course.

Shout Out: The Mission - Styx

Continuing the trend of discussing albums from 2017 that I weren't aware of until after I'd written about the best/worst albums of 2017, here we have a new record from Styx!

OK, I'm quite late on this one but I still feel like it deserves some attention, seeing as how I only found it through the Discover Weekly playlist on Spotify and not any of the lists about 2017 album releases I read over the last couple of years. However, I'm not reviewing it simply because I don't have an awful lot to say about it, at least not in the usual depth I go into on album reviews; hence, Shout Out! Usually Shout Out posts are dedicated to albums I really love but occasionally, I write one when I just want to bring it to people's attention. This is one of those times.
The Mission is a concept album about mankind's journey to Mars with some narrative fluff in between; your typical Prog Arena Rock affair. Whilst this may not have the passion and youthful energy that earlier Styx songs contained (arguably due to the lack of Dennis DeYoung), the band have pulled an ELO and written music to accommodate their age. The majority of tracks are slower, more atmospheric ("Radio Silence", "Time May Bend") but there are a couple of faster paced rockers in there, such as true album opener "Gone Gone Gone" and "The Outpost". Whilst there are a couple of unnecessary filler tracks designed to bridge songs with musical narrative ("Ten Thousand Ways", "All Systems Stable"), it's still a strong album that feels like it was written with the intention of creating great music, not forcing the creators back into the mainstream or making undeserved money off idiotic music magazines and their fans touting the talents of has-beens.
If you like albums that you can chill out to and listen to in the background, The Mission is perfect for you. It starts off with excitement and peacefully mellows out for the rest of the journey, not unlike the launch of a rocket to space (an artistic decision that was hopefully intentional and not me reaching). If you want an album full of "Lorelei"s and "Blue Collar Man"s, you'll be disappointed. I suppose the album opener did a poor job of setting standards from that perspective but hey, that's what I'm here for! There are far more egotistical, unnecessary examples of Prog Rock concept albums out there, although for someone like myself who prefers Rock music that actually Rocks, it's not an album I'll be revisiting any time soon.

1. Overture

2. Gone Gone Gone

3. Hundred Million Miles From Home

4. Trouble At The Big Show

5. Locomotive

6. Radio Silence

7. The Greater Good

8. Time May Bend

9. Ten Thousand Ways

10. Red Storm

11. All Systems Stable

12. Khedive

13. The Outpost

14. Mission To Mars

ALBUM RATING - 6/10

Aaaaand that's me all caught up on blog posts for the month! Bring on April...and May...and June...just keep bringing on months until everything ends.

Firepower - Judas Priest

It's finally here! The latest Judas Priest album since Redeemer Of Souls! Let's see how it holds up against some of their other records! This is how my blog posts work!

Thank fuck for this album, we needed some good quality Metal again!
Firepower is Judas Priest's attempt at recapturing their old magic in an attempt to release another "classic" album; in fact, I'm pretty sure the cover art is a continuation of their Screaming For Vengeance album cover. However, much like their last record, this one starts off incredibly strong but loses steam around the halfway point. Album opener, title track and second single "Firepower" is no "Dragonaut" (even if it does sound vocally similar in the chorus) but it's still a great song. There's a fast Metal rhythm with some heavy riffs to get you headbanging from the start but it's arguably not the best representation of the rest of the album.
Much like "Hardwired" off the latest Metallica album, it builds a false sense of speed and power that you expect is going to be maintained throughout the entire record and yes, whilst the first few tracks are some of the strongest, it's a shame that the loss of energy is not only painfully apparent but seemingly permanent. We start off with tracks containing Maidenesque galloping rhythms ("Lightning Strike") and elements from previous songs like "One Shot At Glory" and "Night Crawler" off the Painkiller album ("Evil Never Dies") and, naturally, there are a couple of great character-based songs that Judas Priest are easily the Heavy Metal masters of ("Necromancer", "Flame Thrower").
Even the slower songs like "Never The Heroes" stand out with more of an 80s Hard Rock feel due to the synth intro and less emphasis on epic riffs, all working in favour of the album. However, we then get to "Guardians", a moody instrumental introduction to "Rising From Ruins" that probably shouldn't have been its own song. This is where the album starts to drag a little as Scott Travis, previously one of my all-time favourite drummers, starts to get a bit tired and rely a little too much on the slow and steady rhythms. The songs from here one are decent but sometimes go on a little too long and neglect to shake things up a bit with energy bursts or progressive sections, resulting in lesser quality material that could've been salvaged with a much needed burst of action ("Traitors Gate", "Spectre").

All in all, plodding Metal tracks aside, the album's still good to listen to. Even if Scott Travis may be waning slightly, he's still keeping the time and helping the great tracks become a little bit more awesome. I'm always going to prefer Judas Priest's fast tempo tracks over their slower ones (especially if they include Blues elements like "Lone Wolf", definitely not what I want to hear in this Heavy Metal album) but as long as those slower tracks have epic riffs and vocals, I can dig it. Thankfully, the rest of the band are still able to produce high quality riffs and falsetto screeches comparable to their earlier material although once again they've decided to end the album on slow epic "Sea Of Red" rather than a rousing explosion of Metal like, say, "No Surrender".
I complained about their choice to end Redeemer Of Souls on a power ballad and whilst this is nowhere near as bad, it's still a weak way to end an album. It feels more like an exhausted exhale than the BANG needed to leave fans with a great impression. If you're going to end on a slow and epic note, it needs to stand apart from the other epics on your album. It needs to feel like the band have pushed themselves to create something awesome, not just stuck one of their filler tracks at the end. Compare some of the album closers Iron Maiden have put out like "Rime Of The Ancient Mariner", "Hallowed Be Thy Name" and "Empire Of The Clouds" with "Sea Of Red". Iron Maiden know that the last song should leave a lasting impression, whether it's with sheer length or grand ambition, something Judas Priest have clearly forgotten about in the last decade.
It's quite tricky to talk about Firepower in as much length as other albums as there's not an awful lot to say that will give you necessary information or differentiate it from other records by older bands who are still going to this date, so let's list off the key points. The first half is great, the second half is weak but not bad. The songs sound like a healthy blend of classic songwriting and modern recording technology/instrumentation. Judas Priest aren't ready to throw in the towel yet but equally they're not booting down doors and announcing to the world that they're here to stay. This album feels like a well crafted effort but won't be remembered as one of the band's strongest entries, hence I rate it 6/10.
Maybe the better tracks will grow on me over time but I've had about a week to enjoy this album and I still can't really hum any of the riffs or clearly imagine the melodies in the same way I could after listening to Dystopia - Megadeth. On the plus side, at least Judas Priest didn't try to rip off fans with a deluxe edition containing nothing but a fancy cover and a lyric booklet...


Oh?


Oh.

Rapid Fire: Tearaway Unfolded, Yooka-Laylee, Super Mario Odyssey

Another Rapid Fire post but this time, it's....
VIDEO GAME EDITION!
Similar to previous Rapid Fire posts, I'll be looking at three albums (or in this case, soundtracks) and briefly discussing them before giving them a rating and highlighting tracks that I thought stood out.
The three video game soundtracks I'll be looking at do share certain aspects. For starters, they're all from 3D platformers and they're all relatively recent releases (two came out this year). However, the musical style for each soundtrack is unique enough to warrant their choices for this post, in my opinion. Apologies if you're not into video game music but you might get some joy out of these soundtracks, if you can find them.


1. Tearaway Unfolded - Brian D'Oliveira and Kenneth Young

Tearaway Unfolded is probably one of my favourite platformers ever and if it weren't for A Hat In Time, it'd be my favourite platformer of the last decade (even if it is technically an adaptation/remake). It contains some amazing platforming segments unlike any other in video game history and brings out the creativity through innovative ways. Thankfully, the soundtrack is equally unique for a video game and doesn't fall into the trap of being too much like Mario, nor does it try to be grand like Skyrim. It's whimsical and at times a bit clunky but it works perfectly in the game.
There's a clear difference between the tracks composed by Kenneth Young and the ones by Brian D'Oliveira. Young tends to be responsible for the tunes that are more jovial and quaint, such as the first tune "The Hole In The Sky" or "Cutting Mat" and its variants whereas D'Oliveira is best at the harsher sounding, more dissonant pieces such as "The Barn" and "Scraps" (again, along with its variants). However, occasionally the two work together to give us some of the game's iconic tracks such as "Gibbet Hill Pilgrimage" or individually choose to blend styles to give us excellent pieces like "The Orchards" or techno-Folk track "Between The Pages, Page Two".
It's hard to accurately describe without getting stuck into the soundtrack (and game) yourself but the great thing about the soundtrack is the bizarre yet soothing nature to it. It's the musical equivalent of a claymation cottage with a roaring fire in a Tim Burtonesque forest landscape; quaint but with a hint of kookiness. It also doesn't fall into the trap of trying so hard to be weird that it forgets to be good. Many tracks are catchy and cute, just like the game itself, but overall the soundtrack for Tearaway Unfolded is delightful. It's not your typical sweeping Disney-lite score or epic World Of Warcraft feast, it's something eclectic and special for fans of the genre.

1. The Hole In The Sky
2. Scraps

3. Cutting Mat #1

4. Green Man Groove

5. The Orchards

6. The Squirrel Village

7. Renaissance Hop (Record Scratching Tune)

8. Pig Riding

9. St. Swithin's Moor

10. St. Swithin's Moor, Corvus Hexus

11. St. Swithin's Moor, Scraps

12. St. Swithin's Moor, The Big Tree

13. Enter The Barn

14. Rollin'

15. The Barn

16. Shouty Orange Head

17. Cutting Mat #2

18. Gibbet Hill Intro, Lament & Hornpipe

19. Gibbet Hill Pilgrimage

20. Gibbet Hill Scraps

21. Gibbet Hill Processional

22. Sogport Scraps

23. The Baby Wendigo

24. Squirrels & Scraps

25. Cutting Mat #3

26. Beach Bum

27. Heartless Reel

28. The Tavern

29. Wendigo Fissure

30. Elevate This

31. Gopher It

32. The Gopher

33. The Lab

34. The Lab Tick Tock

35. The Lab Scraps

36. The Caverns Scraps

37. The Caverns Scraps Chase

38. Scraps Crazy

39. Cutting Mat #4, Scraps

40. Scraps Reformed

41. Between The Pages, Page One

42. Between The Pages, Page Two

43. Desert Of The Mind

44. Desert Pig Ride

45. Desert Plane Ride

46. The Mislaid Message

47. The Tear

48. The You

49. Is This Goodbye

50. The Message

ALBUM RATING - 7/10

Next up is a platformer that everyone's saying was a disappointment even though people loved it when it came out.

2. Yooka-Laylee - Steve Burke, Grant Kirkhope and David Wise

Similar to the previous soundtrack, the duty of composing the music wasn't just given to one artist. Composers from a collection of classic Nintendo platformers were brought in to give the game that classic N64 feel; Grant Kirkhope provided music for levels, Steve Burke for multiplayer games and David Wise for minecart levels with each of them trying their hand at boss battle themes too. Whilst each artist brings their own specific flair to appropriate tracks, this can work against the illusion of creating a nostalgia fest.
Older games usually stuck with one main composer so the classic N64 or PS1 games often had their own signature sound. The problem with a modern game designed to evoke memories and feelings experienced when playing those classics BUT with multiple composers is that you're never really going to become fully immersed in the memory. One moment, you'll be back in your old living room running around in Banjo Kazooie as you listen to Kirkhope's marimba filled Tribalstack Tropics (or "World 1 Theme" as it's called on the soundtrack to avoid spoilers), the next you'll be riding a minecart listening to one of David Wise's minecart themes that sounds noticeably different, as if it's from a completely different game...because it is! It's from Donkey Kong Country.
As far as the soundtrack goes, it needed to be more consistent to truly achieve its goal. I appreciate that they tried to achieve this by giving different composers different responsibilities and I don't want to give you the wrong idea about the quality of the music; it's well crafted and aside from a few annoying multiplayer game themes, every song is catchy enough to keep you entertained as you play. However, as bad as this sounds, I almost feel like the soundtrack needed less variety. If you wanted a soundtrack that combines elements of the past with modern platforming innovations, this would've been the way to go. Unfortunately, the gameplay doesn't quite go that far so in the end, it doesn't quite work as well as I wished it had.

1. Main Theme

2. Shipwreck Creek

3. Hivory Towers

4. World 1 Theme

5. World 2 Theme

6. World 3 Theme

7. World 4 Theme

8. World 5 Theme

9. Uphill Battle

10. Frosty Fray

11. Armed And Dangerous

12. Track Attack

13. Skiffy Skirmish

14. Final Beeting

15. Kartos Karting

16. Bee Bop

17. Hurdle Hijinx

18. Up 'N' Nova

19. Jobstacle Course

20. Glaciators

21. Blag The Flag

22. Gun-tlet Run

23. Minecart Theme (World 1)

24. Minecart Theme (World 2)

25. Minecart Theme (World 3)

26. Minecart Theme (World 4)

27. Minecart Theme (World 5)

28. Tropic Trials

29. World 1 Variant #1

30. World 1 Variant #2

31. World 2 Variant #1

32. World 2 Variant #2

33. World 3 Variant #1

34. World 3 Variant #2

35. World 4 Variant #1

36. World 4 Variant #2

37. World 5 Variant #1

38. World 5 Variant #2

ALBUM RATING - 6/10

Finally, we have a soundtrack from a game released to critical acclaim just a couple of months ago. It also contains a specially written song as its main theme and I hate it.

3. Super Mario Odyssey - Naoto Kubo, Shiho Fuji and Koji Kondo

Super Mario Odyssey is probably the most ambitious Mario platformer since Sunshine but sadly contains the least ambitious soundtrack since the DS game that basically ripped off "Gusty Garden Galaxy" for one of their levels. It's a collection of generic orchestra music that sounds decent in the levels but holds up poorly outside of the game, something that can't be said for the previous two albums I've looked at in this post...or indeed any video game soundtrack I've written about in length on the blog before. It has the basics covered (each level has its distinct theme, the first proper level has a grand feel to convey exploration, yada yada yada) but to me, it makes one crucial mistake.

When I think of Mario platformers of the past, I can always think of at least one specific tune that stands out and acts as a kind of representative of the game. More often than not it's the game's main theme or hub world music but occasionally it's from a level. Super Mario 64 has "Bob-Omb Battlefield", Super Mario Sunshine has "Delfino Plaza" and Super Mario Galaxy has the aforementioned "Gusty Garden Galaxy". Super Mario Odyssey doesn't have that instantly iconic level theme. The closest it has is the "Steam Gardens" music but even that doesn't grab you in the same way previous tunes do; if anything, it's notable for sounding like music from a series other than Mario. That's about it.

However, what the game DOES have is its own song with lyrics and everything. "Jump Up, Super Star!" or, as it's called on the soundtrack, "NDC Festival". This is the song that's used in the game's opening menu and in all the fucking promotional material for the game, emphasis on "promotion". I hate this song because I don't hear a colourful piece of video game music; I hear manufactured, soulless advertising in the guise of a song. The music's alright but when lyrics contain lines like "It's freedom like you never knew" and "I'm flipping the switch" that sound like they're trying to push a product instead of entertain gamers, the catchy tune doesn't mean shit.

There are a couple of decent tracks in this game but everything else just kind of blends into the scenery. Even 8-bit remixes of each level fall flat because...well, it's fucking 8-bit. It sounds like crap compared to a fully orchestrated score (although the concept is still neat). Iconic music has been replaced by undeniable corporate box-ticking, although the game is great so I guess it must have worked on me in some level. That doesn't stop me from pointing out how weak the soundtrack is compared to the last couple of proper 3D Mario platformers that also used an orchestra but had the benefit of being led by Koji Kondo, a much superior composer to Naoto Kubo.

1. Bonneton

2. Fossil Falls

3. Fossil Falls (8-Bit)

4. Fossil Falls: Dinosaur

5. Tostarena: Ruins

6. Tosatarena: Ruins (8-Bit)

7. Tostarena: Night

8. Tostarena: Night (8-Bit)

9. Tostarena: Town

10. Tostarena: Jaxi

11. Steam Gardens

12. Steam Gardens (8-Bit)

13. Steam Gardens: Sherm

14. Lake Lamode 1

15. Lake Lamode 1 (8-Bit)

16. Lake Lamode 2

17. Lake Lamode: Underwater Passage

18. Forgotten Isle 1

19. Forgotten Isle 2

20. Forgotten Isle 2 (8-Bit)

21. New Donk City: Night 1

22. New Donk City: Night 2

23. New Donk City: Daytime

24. New Donk City: Cafe

25. New Donk City (Band Performance)

26. NDC Festival

27. NDC Festival (Japanese)

28. NDC Festival (8-Bit)

29. Bubblaine

30. Bubblaine: Underwater

31. Bubblaine (8-Bit)

32. Shiveria: Town

33. Shiveria: Race Course Entrance

34. Mount Volbono

35. Mount Volbono (8-Bit)

36. Mount Volbono: Town

37. Bowser's Castle 1

38. Bowser's Castle 1 (8-Bit)

39. Bowser's Castle 2

40. Honeylune Ridge

41. Honeylune Ridge (8-Bit)

42. Honeylune Ridge: Caves

43. Honeylune Ridge: Wedding Hall

44. Honeylune Ridge: Collapse

45. Honeylune Ridge: Collapse (8-Bit)

46. Honeylune Ridge: Escape

47. Honeylune Ridge: Escape (Japanese)

48. Honeylune Ridge: Escape (8-Bit)

49. Peach's Castle

50. Broodals Battle

51. Madame Broode Battle

52. Knucklotec Battle

53. Torkdrift Battle

54. Mechawiggler Battle

55. Mollusque-Lanceur Battle

56. Mollusque-Lanceur Battle (8-Bit)

57. Cookatiel Battle

58. Ruined Dragon Battle

59. RoboBrood Battle

60. Bowser Battle 1

61. Bowser Battle 2

62. Run, Jump, Throw! 1

63. Run, Jump, Throw! 2

64. Run, Jump, Throw! 2 (8-Bit)

65. Subterranean 1

66. Subterranean 1 (8-Bit)

67. Subterranean 2

68. Caves

69. Ice

70. Another World

71. Ruins

72. Ruins (8-Bit)

73. Projection Room (Above Ground)

74. Projection Room (Underground)

75. Above The Clouds

76. Toad Brigade Member

77. To The Next Kingdom

78. Shop

79. Race

80. RC Car

81. Spinning Slots

82. Climactic Duel!

83. Staff Roll

ALBUM RATING - 5/10

Jesus, that was a pain to type out. The next blog post won't be so long or arduous on the scroll bar!

Rapid Fire: Paramore, Steel Panther, Maximo Park

It's Rapid Fire time! This time, the theme is modern Rock albums heavily inspired by 80s music. We've got an album inspired by New Wave, an album inspired by Hair Metal and an album inspired by Alternative/Pop Rock. These are all albums released within the last ten years of writing this post so I consider them "new" or "modern" Rock albums, even though there are probably better albums I could've picked that are more recent.
Anyway, enough about that. Time to get tubular!


1. After Laughter - Paramore

I've made my thoughts on Paramore clear in the past so you might be asking yourself why I chose to discuss their latest album here. My girlfriend has been listening to this album non-stop recently but I have to say, I didn't actually hate it. It's a huge departure from their whiny, teen oriented faux-Rock sound into more of an upbeat, 80s New Wave affair and whilst there aren't any songs on the album that I love to the point of wanting to listen to them of my own free will, After Laughter does a good job of holding my interest until the last song is done.
As suggested by the album's name and cover, After Laughter is all about contrasting the pleasant, superficial visuals with more sombre lyrical themes. This is perfectly demonstrated in the album opener, "Hard Times". It might sound like something played during Disco Night at your local club but it's not all wine and roses when you give it a second listen. Whilst there are plenty of tracks that go great lengths to sound joyful by blending modern and 80s musical effects ("Told You So", "Grudges"), the band aren't afraid to get artistically mopey with their music when appropriate ("26", "Tell Me How") offering musical variety that keeps listeners engaged.
Overall, the band did a pretty great job of creating a new album that isn't all about hollow nostalgia. Sure, it's present but it feels less like a cheap attempt at getting noticed and more like an intentional desire to blend a musical sound people associate with happiness with lyrical themes about loss and depression. If the band combined these themes with exclusively modern Pop elements, it'd sound generic and probably too far removed from the band's sound. At least After Laughter's New Wave elements still trace back to the band's past as a Rock band, although I can't imagine fans of their high school Pop Rock dirge taking a liking to this as much as previous albums. Personally, I'd say it's great if you previously disliked Paramore and would recommend it to fans of 80s Pop.

1. Hard Times

2. Rose-Colored Boy

3. Told You So

4. Forgiveness

5. Fake Happy

6. 26

7. Pool

8. Grudges

9. Caught In The Middle

10. Idle Worship

11. No Friend

12. Tell Me How

ALBUM RATING - 7/10

Yes, I liked a Paramore album. It's motivated me to check out some more of their older stuff, although I wasn't a big fan of their self-titled album from a few years ago. Ah well, it's something. Next is an album that's also something!


2. Feel The Steel - Steel Panther

When I last discussed Steel Panther and their latest album, Lower The Bar, I talked about how they were overly reliant on their crude lyrics as a parody of the Hair Metal genre. Since this was their first album, I thought it'd be appropriate to look at the band before they started beating a dead horse. Naturally, this album is far stronger than Lower The Bar...and far more inappropriate, but I'll get onto that in a bit. Album opener "Death To All But Metal" is the audio equivalent to the opening fight scene in The Lego Batman Movie; all the cards are on the table and you find yourself asking "Jesus, how the hell can they possibly go higher than this?"
It consists of the band mouthing off against modern Pop/Rock artists such as blink-182 and Kanye West whilst also containing some amusing self-referential lyrics about their rhyme structure. It introduces you to Steel Panther and sets the tone for the rest of the album. However, just because the first song is a powerhouse of Hair Metal riffs and aggression, that doesn't mean the band shy away from power ballad parodies such as "Community Property" and "Stripper Girl". They're decent tracks but if the band wanted to sound like a real 80s Hair Metal band, they probably should've toned the production values down (or at least waited until follow up albums to use string accompaniments).
It's hard to describe this album without using the same phrases from my Lower The Bar review, as the band still lovingly yet subtly plagiarise their 80s Hard Rock influences such as Bon Jovi ("Party All Day") and Whitesnake ("Fat Girl") but the entire album is spoilt by dumb lyrics that milk mildly amusing gags raw. The only song I rate highly is one that was clearly written to get radio promotion, "Eyes Of A Panther", as it's just a solid Hair Metal track that isn't trying to be funny or rude. If the album had more of these on the standard edition tracklist, I'd like it a lot more, but as it stands it's a good joke gone too far.

1. Death To All But Metal

2. Asian Hooker

3. Community Property

4. Eyes Of A Panther

5. Fat Girl

6. Eatin' Ain't Cheatin'

7. Party All Day

8. Turn Out The Lights

9. Stripper Girl

10. The Shocker

11. Girl From Oklahoma

ALBUM RATING - 6/10

Finally, an album by a band I used to love and have probably seen live more than any other Rock/Metal group.

3. The National Health - Maximo Park

Despite sounding like a typical modern UK Indie band for their first three albums, I still rated Maximo Park better than other generic bands of a similar genre like Arctic Monkeys and Razorlight because they had a bit more energy to them. Their fourth album could be considered more of the same but to me, sounds a bit less like Rock and more like 80s Alternative and Synth-Pop blended into a new sound. Despite this, the album does start off as Rock. Album opener "When I Was Wild" is a minute long soft introduction to the true album opener and title track, "The National Health". This track inappropriately paints a picture of fast paced modern Rock but damn, it's a good tune.

A better opener probably would've been the lead single, "Hips And Lips". Sure, it has some Rock elements but it's largely built around New Romantic style vocals and synth melodies. The rest of the album contains a collection of Alternative tracks that once again blend familiarity of 80s groups such as REM with a more contemporary sound ("Until The Earth Would Open", "Wolf Among Men") and a few synth heavy tracks that wouldn't sound out of place at Goth clubs ("Banlieue").

This album feels more like a collection of songs thrown together than a solid, cohesive album. Overall, The National Health doesn't quite "experiment" as much as I imagine the band felt they did after releasing it but as a follow up to previous albums, it's pretty good. To me, the better tracks are ones where the Rock aspects take precedence over the Synth-Pop ones as opposed to mixing them evenly or giving Pop priority and the album doesn't feature too many of them. However, if you like modern Indie with a generous splashing of 80s Pop, I'd recommend this album. If you want more energetic Rock with some heavy keyboard accompaniment, check out Our Earthly Pleasures instead.

1. When I Was Wild

2. The National Health

3. Hips And Lips

4. The Undercurrents

5. Write This Down

6. Reluctant Love

7. Until The Earth Would Open

8. Banlieue

9. This Is What Becomes Of The Brokenhearted

10. Wolf Among Men

11. Take Me Home

12. Unfamiliar Places

13. Waves Of Fear

ALBUM RATING - 7/10

And that's October! Have a happy Halloween and I'll see you next month!

Showdown: Under Cover - Motorhead

Despite Motorhead's frontman and eternal badass of Metal Lemmy being deceased, Motorhead are still releasing new studio material...well, half new anyway. Today's blog post is taking a look at the new Motorhead covers album entitled Under Cover (minus an umlaud over the o in typical Motorhead fashion) and whether or not Motorhead's heavier versions of iconic Rock tracks are as good if not better than the originals similar to previous Showdown posts with Whitesnake and Halestorm covers albums.

Since the covers on this album weren't deliberately recorded with the intention of making a covers album, I won't be giving individual verdicts influenced by whether these are the best songs by the respective bands Motorhead could've covered. They're covers that the band performed at some point in their career and each track has been assembled into a single compilation aside from one new track recorded before Lemmy's passing.
Right then, let's look at Motorhead's new album for what may be the last time, although I hope they release a compilation of their previously unreleased 2008 rerecordings at some point.

EDIT: Forgot to add this Spotify playlist containing each track (original and cover). Feel free to listen to them as you read my write-ups!



ROUND ONE: Breaking The Law
Judas Priest - Arguably the band's most famous song due partly to their music video, this song kicks things off with an instantly recognisable riff and a heavy driving bassline. It's a great little tune that's been improved over the years by speeding up the tempo and adding a sweet solo but as far as the original studio recording goes, this will always be one of Judas Priest's staples. It's just a shame Rob Halford always phones it in when playing it live by getting the audience to sing most, if not all, of it.
Motorhead - The tempo sounds a little bit faster and the guitar much heavier but goddamn, Lemmy's voice is fucking perfect for this track. Rob Halford may have the falsetto nailed down but the gravelly vocals this song requires is where Lemmy excels. It's a pretty faithful cover with no added frills until the little guitar melodies in the outro.
VERDICT - Definitely a strong track to open the covers album on and definitely a win for Motorhead. Whilst the Judas Priest original will always be THE version of this song, Motorhead did a damn fine job of recreating and (in my opinion) surpassing it.

ROUND TWO: God Save The Queen
Sex Pistols - I can't fucking stand these chancers. They slagged off bands like The Who and Queen and ended up releasing one album full of mediocre Punk anthems. However, of all the tracks I've heard of theirs, this is probably one of the better tracks. Solid guitar riffs and it even has a solo. It might be a dogshit solo but that's still impressive for Punk. The only thing that lets it down aside from the non-vocals is the "NOOOOO FU-TURE" section that sounds like a particularly uninspired football chant.
Motorhead - I'm not sure why Lemmy tried to do Punk vocals here as his deep guttural singing could've partially saved this track. Once again, it's a relatively faithful cover that sounds more like a tribute to this band than Motorhead's attempt to make the song their own, although I can fully understand why Lemmy gave up even pretending to sing with passion during the "NOOOO FU-TURE" part.
VERDICT - For all the shit I've said about this song and the Sex Pistols, I'm giving the win to the Sex Pistols because their original version sounds like a better Punk track than the Motorhead cover does a Punk or Metal one. Lemmy's voice didn't make the song enjoyable and the rest of the band sounded like they didn't really give much of a shit. It was too coordinated and paint-by-numbers to truly encapsulate the Punk spirit so I'm not sure why they even bothered.

ROUND THREE: Heroes
David Bowie - I love this song, it's easily my favourite Bowie track. It's hard to pinpoint exactly what I love about it as everything just comes together into an immaculate single entity but if I had to analyse the track, I think the subdued guitar is one of the strongest aspects. It's still there playing great riffs and haunting melodies but it's quite far back in the mix compared to Bowie's vocals which take centre stage. The combination of his vocal-line and the guitar creates a multi-layered tune that I never get tired of hearing from start to finish.
Motorhead - Recorded in 2015 during the Bad Magic sessions, this is the only cover that hasn't been previously released...unless you count the band releasing it as a single to promote this album. I wish I could say that they did it justice but honestly, I think it's shit. The drums are a little too fast for me and Lemmy's vocals don't really get interesting until about halfway through when his backing vocals come in; however, both of these would be forgivable if not for the guitar. It sounds like a fucking air-raid siren and the solo sounds too active for a song like this. It should be soft and subdued instead of obvious, resulting in a bland piece of music overall.
VERDICT - David Bowie was probably always going to win this one but I'm disappointed in Motorhead's attempt at it. They proved they weren't just about being loud and heavy with "Whorehouse Blues" in 2004 (not to mention the Bluesy rerecording of "Ace Of Spades" in 2010) but it's a shame they couldn't turn the volume down from 11 here.

ROUND FOUR: Starstruck
Rainbow - Not one of Rainbow's best unless you're into your Blues Rock but it's a solid song. Dio's vocals are vintage Dio and Blackmore's guitar carries the entire track with catchy riffs throughout although the solo isn't particularly memorable for a song with him onboard. If I didn't know this was one of their big songs, I'd assume it was a filler track.
Motorhead - So technically, this isn't a true Motorhead cover. This is Motorhead playing the music whilst Biff Byford from Saxon sings the vocals (although Lemmy wails along in the chorus). It sounds more like a Saxon cover than Motorhead due to the cleaner guitar and more restrained bass but overall, I dig it. If anything, I kinda wish Lemmy had less involvement as the chorus is the weakest part.
VERDICT - Yeah, I'm giving this to Motorhead ft. Biff Byford. The Rainbow original sounds a bit flat compared to this cover, although I'm not really sure why this track made the cut. If cover songs with guest musicians were eligible, they should've included Lemmy's cover of "The Trooper". THAT's a fucking great cover.

ROUND FIVE: Cat Scratch Fever
Ted Nugent - Uncle Ted might be a thundering bellend but when he was in the studio, he knew how to lay down a fucking sweet riff for a pure Rock song. Unfortunately, this is not one of those times and instead, we get this tired pile of shite. If music could sound bored, it would sound like the riff for "Cat Scratch Fever". Even the solo's generic, although Ted was never great at iconic solos. Just badass riffs...which this song doesn't have.
Motorhead - The riff's a bit better with more weight to it and Lemmy's growling vocals compliment the music much better than Ted's. The solo's also beefed up a bit too, making it more enjoyable to listen to as the minor bursts of shredding prevent you from falling asleep where you usually would in the original. I actually found myself nodding my head and tapping my foot towards the end, even though it's still the same song.
VERDICT - Motorhead got a little bit more creative with their recording of the song, even borrowing the outro from "Iron Fist" to make this cover sound more like one of their singles. Motorhead's cover is superior in every way so Motorhead get the win. It's a shame this is one of Ted Nugent's better known tracks although I can't say I'll lose much sleep over anything unfortunate happening to that tool.

ROUND SIX: Jumpin' Jack Flash
The Rolling Stones - Probably my favourite Rolling Stones song (Motorhead sure knew how to pick 'em, huh). I've always felt like post 1960s Rolling Stones are the ideal entry level Rock band for someone who has no idea what good Rock music sounds like but their 60s material can be pretty great, particularly if they've built the song around a great riff like this. Jagger's vocals are at their best and the song doesn't go on too long. In fact, to say it doesn't have a solo or anything fancy to pad it out, it's quite a tight package of Rock.
Motorhead - This sounds like a version of the song used in a film like Wayne's World when they wanted a more modern version of a famous track that wasn't expensive to license. Lemmy's vocals work pretty well and the heavier instruments make it sound a little rougher edged, a quality that The Rolling Stones should've kept throughout their career. However, the best part of this track is the actual outro rather than fading out. It would've been cool to hear the original with a proper ending.
VERDICT - Both tracks have their strengths but I'm giving the win to The Rolling Stones simply because I prefer the sound of their guitar tone to Motorhead's, although I do like their cover.

ROUND SEVEN: Sympathy For The Devil
The Rolling Stones - OK, I guess we've got another Stones track. It's not one I'm a huge fan of but there are several aspects I quite like. For starters, the bass is great and the lyrics stand out as some of the best by The Rolling Stones. I also like the progression of the track and how the mix changes with each verse, although part of me wonders what it'd be like if there was just a bit more guitar. It doesn't have to be an Earth-shattering riff but maybe some rhythm guitar after the second chorus could've made it that little bit better, especially since the guitar solos kind of suck.
Motorhead - Straight away, we've got the Cozy Powell "Dance With The Devil" drumbeat and once Lemmy starts singing (yes, he actually sings) the song becomes awesome. The bass sounds amazing and gives the song a whole new energy, the guitar solos aren't as sporadic and choppy, the enhanced percussion during the solos packs an excellent wallop and the genre of the song is definitively Rock. I fucking love this cover.
VERDICT - Similar to the last track, both songs are great in their own right but you all know I'm awarding it to Motorhead. I don't even know if I can listen to the original in the same way again now that I know this cover exists, that's how good it is.

ROUND EIGHT: Hellraiser
Ozzy Osbourne - Hats off to Ozzy for creating a badass Metal track without Randy or Jake E. Lee that isn't just a recreation of "Crazy Train". Ozzy's vocals don't sound as ridiculous as they usually do and the vocal effects make the song sound more epic, not to mention the great guitar riffs peppered throughout the track. I'm not entirely sure why they were going for a futuristic sound with all the synth and vocoder/guitar effects when the track's called "Hellraiser" but I can't say I dislike them.
Motorhead - This is the only track on the list where I heard the Motorhead version before the original. I'm aware that Ozzy and Lemmy wrote it together but since Ozzy released it first, I think it's fair to call this a cover (especially if Motorhead consider it one as well). It definitely sounds less polished than the Ozzy version although at least Lemmy's thick bass is awesome; plus, the stripped back sound makes it sound more like a proper Heavy Metal tune.
VERDICT - Tricky. Motorhead's version has a much better guitar solo but on a track where Ozzy really gave it his all in the vocal department, Lemmy's pipes just don't give me the same chills as the original. Ozzy Osbourne takes a well earned win.

ROUND NINE: Rockaway Beach
Ramones - Of all the Punk bands in existence, I probably have the most forgiveness for the Ramones due to them sounding like a Rock band with Punk edges rather than the other way round. I've talked about this song in a previous Showdown post so if you've read that, you'll know that I like the break between chorus and verse although wish the band were talented enough to have extended it with a solo. Still, it's a punchy little Pop-Punk tune.
Motorhead - It's no secret that Lemmy was a huge fan of the Ramones; he even recorded a track with Motorhead entitled "R.A.M.O.N.E.S" as a tribute. As far as this cover's concerned, Motorhead do a bang up job. Lemmy might sound a little bored but his vocal delivery actually works pretty damn well here. Other than that, it's a short song and Motorhead followed each note pretty faithfully.
VERDICT - To me, both songs are as good as each other, even for their genres. I'm giving the win to Ramones for being the ones to create the song and for inspiring Motorhead to write amazing tracks of their own.

ROUND TEN: Shoot 'Em Down
Twisted Sister - Not one of Twisted Sister's better known hits and, as far as 4/4/ Hard Rock tracks go, it's even more basic than your average AC/DC song. Fortunately, it has a fairly decent solo that sounds like fun to play although it's a shame the rest of the track is dull as dishwater. However, I imagine Motorhead took interest in it due to the Punk nature of it; simplistic guitar riff, obscenities in the lyrics, aggressive sound. Probably the best Twisted Sister track for Motorhead to cover.
Motorhead - Congrats Motorhead, you improved pretty much every aspect of this song. The solo might not sound quite as good (although it's still decent) but everything else has been tightened up to a suitable degree. Tempo's a bit quicker, drums are a bit louder, Lemmy's vocals are back to their usual gritty texture and even if it doesn't sound quite like a typical Motorhead song, the band took the source material and amplified it.
VERDICT - Motorhead deserve the win for obvious reasons. They've transformed a mediocre Hard Rock track into a decent Heavy Metal one without needing to completely rewrite.

ROUND ELEVEN: Whiplash
Metallica - A fan favourite from Metallica's debut, presumably thanks to a mix of rose-tinted glasses and comparing it with their more recent attempts at Metal. Sure, it has rapid guitar throughout and the drums maintain their fury from start to finish but other than that, it's a pretty bog standard affair. There are some decent riffs but overall it sounds like a much tamer version of "Hit The Lights", right down to the solo.
Motorhead - Metallica have covered a bunch of Motorhead tracks in their career so it's interesting to hear the tables turned, especially with Lemmy's thick bass taking centre stage. The bassline sounds more like a Motorhead track and even if Lemmy's vocals can't quite keep up with the track's speed, they still sound right for the song. Unfortunately, the guitar riff before the solo has been butchered but thankfully, the rest of the song is pure Metal. Also, I like how they changed the lyrics to reflect "we are Motorhead" instead of "we are Metallica"; definitely a great pick to end the album on.
VERDICT - If this was any other song off Kill 'Em All, Metallica almost certainly would've claimed the victory here. The original song's good but Motorhead took it and made it fucking great, earning them the final win.

FINAL SCORES:
Motorhead - 6
Originals - 5

A great collection of covers with a few duds but overall, it gets the thumbs up from me! I rate Under Cover a 6/10 for being a simple yet earnest collection of Motorhead material that casual listeners may not have heard, although I would've preferred a few different choices. Did you know Motorhead have covered "Tie Your Mother Down" - Queen? It's pretty fucking good. So's their cover of "Blue Suede Shoes" - Elvis Presley and "It's A Long Way To The Top" - AC/DC.
They should've been on the album instead of "Cat Scratch Fever" and "Jumpin' Jack Flash" but there's always the possibility that the band chose these covers because they knew they were Lemmy's favourites and they wanted this to be a collection he'd be proud of. If that is the case, I admire them for releasing this compilation out of love instead of a dwindling bank balance. Since Motorhead have a bunch of other decent covers, I wouldn't object to the band/record label releasing Under Cover 2 in the future even if it was their way of getting money for old rope.