Showing posts with label Metallica. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Metallica. Show all posts

Thursday, 16 August 2018

Tenology: Mondegreens In Rock/Metal

Mondegreen, noun: A misheard lyric of a song, typically a phrase rather than a single word.

One of the many Tenology posts currently in the works deals with Mondegreens in Rock/Metal music old and new. When assembling this list, I tried to avoid choosing songs with forced misinterpretations that clearly sound nothing like the original lyrics, instead opting for lyrics that are either well known Mondegreens or ones that I've personally misheard over the years.
Underneath each track is an embedded YouTube video that starts just before the Mondegreen in question. However, since videos get taken down every day, I'll also be including a Spotify playlist at the bottom of this post along with the exact time of the Mondegreen for said Spotify track. Again, the time listed in the title is for the Spotify track, NOT the YouTube one.


1. "Paranoid" - Black Sabbath (2:20)

Lyric: "And so as you hear these words, telling you now of my state".
Mondegreen: "And so as you hear these words, telling you now I want my steak".



Of all the lyrics that I've misheard over the years, this is the one that probably surprised (and embarrassed) me the most. I only discovered the real lyrics after singing this song on Rock Band with one of my friends, outing myself as a classless fool who didn't know the real lyrics to a Black Sabbath song. Fortunately, I don't think he gave a shit and my social status remained untouched that day. To be honest, I prefer the delivery of "I want my steak" and will always hear those words when I listen to this song.


2. "Kid Charlemagne" - Steely Dan (3:26)

Lyric: "Careful what you carry".
Mondegreen: "Care for wine, Drew Carey?"



I once read a heated debate in a YouTube comment section as to whether the lyric in a song about drug dealers was about caution when transporting goods to a car or offering the host of Whose Line Is It Anyway a glass of Pino Grigio. It went on for some time and the only purpose it served was allowing me to list it as a Mondegreen some 10 years or so later. Whilst I've never made the mistake of thinking the lyric was genuinely about Drew Carey myself, I can hear both versions when I listen to it.


3. "Turn Up The Radio" - Autograph (1:33)

Lyric: "The only time I turn it down, is when I'm sleeping it off".
Mondegreen: "The only time I turn it down, is when I'm feelin' it up".



Unlike "Paranoid", this Mondegreen is one that I may have made myself but didn't believe was genuine for years. I listened to this song and wasn't sure if he was singing about feeling music up although didn't care enough about the real lyrics enough to do a five second Google search. However, after knowing the correct lyrics, I feel like that's all I can hear now. However, if you find a version of this song with weaker audio quality, you might mishear the lyrics too.


4. "Blinded By The Light" - Manfred Mann's Earth Band (0:11)

Lyric: "Blinded by the light, revved up like a deuce, another runner...".
Mondegreen: "Blinded by the light, wrapped up like a douche, another runner...".



Continuing the trend of alternating personal Mondegreens with fairly well known ones, this song contains arguably one of the most common Mondegreens in existence. I mean, just listen to it! They must've heard the chorus after recording it and thought "Hmmm, that kinda sounds like we're talking about wrapping up douches. Should we do another take?" before deciding to take an early lunch instead. Ah well, at least this isn't the band's signature song or anything...


5. "Footloose" - Kenny Loggins (2:37)

Lyric: "Gotta take the hold of all".
Mondegreen: "I'll take the whole of Rome".



Another Mondegreen that I only believed because I couldn't figure out what the actual lyrics were when I first heard this song. I can't remember exactly why but at some point in my youth, I was typing out all the lyrics to this song and didn't have the common sense to simply Google the lyrics...so I tried to work it out phonetically and needless to say, ended up very confused. Now I know the actual words, I can hear "all" instead of "Rome" but you have to admit, the first part of the line still doesn't sound quite right.


6. "Hate Not Gone" - Stone Sour (2:10)

Lyric: "My Hell is running cold".
Mondegreen: "My Elvis wouldn't go".



This is one that I've coined but every time I hear this song, whenever it gets to the line before the chorus, I always hear "My Elvis wouldn't go". This line appears throughout the entire song but I've selected the line that I believe sounds the funniest when you imagine Corey Taylor lamenting the fact that his personal King Of Rock wouldn't do what he wanted. This isn't a well known song so I doubt this is a popular Mondegreen but of all the ones on the list, it's probably one of the easiest ones to hear.


7. "(You Can Still) Rock In America" - Night Ranger (1:23)

Lyric: "Not a sound as she makes her getaway".
Mondegreen: "Not a sound as she Mexican waves".


This is a Mondegreen that I genuinely thought was the actual lyric until I played this song on Clone Hero recently and saw the words "makes her getaway" instead of "Mexican waves". Granted, the actual lyric makes a hell of a lot more sense in the context of the song but I didn't dispute the idea of this fictional character figuratively (or literally) performing a Mexican wave in dead silence. Why? Not entirely sure although I can still hear both versions of the lyric when I listen to this song.


8. "Creeping Death" - Metallica (1:24)

Lyric: "So let it be written, so let it be done".
Mondegreen: "So let me retire, so let me die".



Whilst both lyrics are suitably badass for this absolute beast of a song, I personally prefer the version that I misheard when I first listened to this song. Since the song was called "Creeping Death", I think I naturally assumed the chorus would be about dying. However, some years after hearing it, I discovered that it was actually someone giving orders, kinda like the rest of the song. Should've figured it out but ah well, it's still a fucking great tune.


9. "La Dee Da" - Foo Fighters (0:18)

Lyric: "Jim Jones painting in a blue bedroom".
Mondegreen: "Chimp Trump's bleeding in a blue bedroom



When I first heard this song, I couldn't quite make out the lyrics and assumed it was about Trump due to Dave Grohl's unhappiness with American culture around the time of the album's conception. That and the previous line referring to the White House. Admittedly this isn't a well known Mondegreen (as far as I know) but don't worry, the last one's a bit more infamous.


10. "Fortunate Son" - Creedence Clearwater Revival (1:47)

Lyric: "I ain't no military son".
Mondegreen: "I ain't no milk terrorist's son".



Again, I quite like the term "milk terrorist" but I only discovered the true lyrics after a radio DJ also confessed to getting the lyrics incorrect when they listened to it. Even though I can sort of hear "military son" when I really listen for it, "milk terrorist's son" just sounds more natural. Song's still great, though.




Are there any well known or lesser known but equally amusing Mondegreens in Rock/Metal I've missed? Let me know via Twitter or in the comment section, as I'm probably gonna do another one of these posts in the future if I can find enough examples.

Friday, 27 July 2018

Here Is The News: July 2018 Edition

We're back with more totally real news that hasn't been fabricated for comedic effect!


NEW ERIC CLAPTON GUITAR PEDAL SLAMMED FOR OFFENSIVE DESCRIPTION

Iconic guitarist Eric Clapton has come under fire this week for releasing a guitar effects pedal with a description fans and musicians alike have described as "shocking", "inflammatory" and "uncalled for". The description for the guitar effects pedal, named the "Smokey Lightning Fingers" pedal, reads "If you want to sound as electric as Slow Hands, you want this specially crafted guitar pedal that gets the job done without sounding too loud or aggressive". It goes on to say "Mr Clapton personally oversaw construction of the pedal and has given it his personal seal of approval".

Fans have criticised the pedal's description due to being far too outrageous for the kind of music they'd associate with Eric Clapton (pictured left), many of which took to Twitter to voice their opinions on the pedal's blurb. Some tweets by users who have been left anonymous include "I can't believe Eric Clapton allowed something so forceful to be attributed to his name. 'You want this'? Uhhh, anyone else getting sick of white guys telling us what we want?! #Boycott" and "Have you seen this new guitar pedal's description? 'Electric'? What year is this, is Clapton back on the coke?"

Fans weren't the only ones upset about Eric Clapton's new guitar pedal; musicians also took to Twitter to voice their distaste over the wording of the product. Joyless, generic Indie Pop outfit Braids posted from their account "I may not non-ironically listen to anything from before 2002 but I know that Eric Clapton clearly didn't consider the feelings of the easily upset before giving his 'seal of approval' to this peddle [sic]". Braids also blasted Clapton on stage at a gig in London to nearly two dozen people waiting for a better band to turn up.

In response to the viral outrage over yet another musician trying to do something harmless for their fans, audio equipment company TC Electronic have chosen to withdraw Clapton's guitar pedal from their online shop until further notice. When asked for comment, TC Electronic's spokesperson stated "The last thing we want to do when selling products is hurt anyone's feelings. After all, pushing boundaries and challenging established beliefs isn't what Rock is about; Rock is about playing it safe and appealing to as many demographics as possible, no matter how sensitive or previously indifferent".

Eric Clapton posted on his FaceBook page shortly after the news of the pedal's removal from the online shop dropped. The status update read "milk bread. order milk and bread. order milk an dbread online. how to odrer milk and bread online. best milk for back pain. how to you tube. www.youtube.com www.youtube.com duck videos". About twenty minutes later, Eric's daughter Kelly posted an update on her FaceBook page on behalf of her father that read "My dad is one of the most kind-hearted people on the face of the planet and would never knowingly cause such an outcry...well, apart from that time he reaffirmed his views about Enoch Powell and immigration in 2007. Apart from that, he's a good guy, I guess".


NEW TRAILER FOR ELO BIOPIC RELEASED

A brand new trailer for Out Of The Blue, a biopic about the band Electric Light Orchestra, has been released and is rapidly gaining attention on YouTube and social media. The film tells the exciting, emotional and action-packed story about Jeff Lynne, Roy Wood and the Electric Light Orchestra's career from the early 70s to present day with a splash of drama added to make the biopic more entertaining for general audiences, followed by gallons upon gallons of drama vigorously emptied on top in the hopes that it will earn an award along with a bunch of cash.

Roy Wood and Jeff Lynne (pictured left) were the founding members of the Electric Light Orchestra and are played by Jack Black and Chris Pratt respectively in the biopic. Some fans have criticised the casting but after seeing the pair in action in the two trailers, the general consensus is that the film will be nothing short of perfect. According to the film's director, the band's biography contains very little in the way of high-octane drama or heated conflicts that can be exploited for entertainment purposes so certain elements of the film had to be ever so slightly exaggerated if not completely fabricated.

The trailer featured the moment in which Jeff Lynne came up with the initial idea for the band's signature song after getting beaten up by street gangs and being left for dead in an alley, staring up at an absolutely spotless blue sky. It also boasted an impressive mash-up of some of the band's biggest hits such as "Don't Bring Me Down", "Hold On Tight" and "Turn To Stone", not to mention a superb use of "Evil Woman" during a scene in which Roy Wood and his wife indulged in an incredible, emotional night of passionate arguing.

When asked about why a large portion of the film's trailer appears to have nothing to do with the reality behind the band's history in a recent interview, the film's director stated "Sometimes, you have to supercharge the less interesting moments of a band's career. It doesn't matter if the story behind a band's most iconic song isn't that significant because the people filling up the cinema seats? Those fucking cattle? Those popcorn munching dipshits who went to see a film version of a band's rise to fame instead of watching factual TV interviews or, God forbid, reading up on it? They don't care about the truth; they care about emotional drama in a nostalgic backdrop so they can forget about how shit their lives are for two hours in a dark room surrounded by similar weepy idiots. Now what time does this interview start?" followed by 40 minutes of extensive backpedalling.

Out Of The Blue releases in two months time and is expected to perform favourably at the box office, despite being released alongside Cancer Babies, a gritty heartbreaking drama about hard-done-by women giving birth to infants stricken with cancer in the 70s...and the North.


KIRK HAMMETT TO FACE PEDAL ABUSE CHARGES

Metallica guitarist, Kirk Hammett, has been arrested on suspicion of abusing his wah-pedal for the last 35 years. The entire Metal community has rallied together to ensure Hammett is brought to justice for the way he's treated his guitar pedal during every one of his guitar solos ever since "Hit The Lights", not just the first song Metallica ever wrote and recorded together but also the first alarm bell that Kirk's wah-pedal was being abused.

Once news of Kirk's arrest was made public, Metallica posted a response on their website reading: "Whilst Kirk Hammett will always be part of the Metallica family, we in no way condone abuse and are sorry to any fans we may have offended due to our inaction over Kirk's continued abuse of his wah-pedal. We should have intervened when he kept his foot down on it during the "Dyer's Eve" solo and we definitely should have done more than simply masking the signs of abuse by fading out during the "Fade To Black" outro. From the bottom of our heart, we apologise to the entire Metallica family".

Hammett's crimes were only brought to the police after a coordinated effort by members of the Metallica dedicated fan forum, WeHateMetallica.net. A thread entitled "Anyone else find this a little disturbing?" that detailed multiple examples of abuse recorded on Metallica's albums in a supercut on Youtube rapidly gained steam, attaining over 200 posts within 24 hours. Many posts listed further examples of Hammett abusing his wah-pedal although the majority of posts by Metallica fans resorted to criticising Lars.

The Dunlop KH95 Kirk Hammett Signature Cry Baby wah-pedal (pictured right) is one of many victims that's dealt with Kirk's abuses over the years. In fact, after some research, devoted fans on WeHateMetallica.net uncovered video interviews where Kirk Hammett actually admitted to abusing up to three different wah-pedals simultaneously whilst recording the band's recent album, Hardwired... To Self-Destruct. However, after years of raising funds to hire a prosecutor, the fans were finally able to put together a case against Hammett. Forum mod MoProckzz posted "For too long now, effects pedals have felt Hammett's boot pressing down on them. With all of this evidence we've assembled, we're hoping that justice will finally be done" shortly before three pages of posts talking about Metallica haven't been a real band since ...And Justice For All.

The various effects pedals used by Hammett have been confiscated and taken to a local guitar technician to check for serious injuries although case notes shared on the forum seem to indicate that the trauma is more emotional than physical. One thing's for certain though: it'll be a while before Kirk Hammett abuses a guitar pedal again...at least a couple of months when the band go back on tour.


More news coming next month!

Sunday, 17 December 2017

Tenology: Valuable Vocalists In Rock/Metal

Here we are! The end of this four-part Tenology collection looking at impressive musicians who take on the four main roles of any great Rock/Metal outfit. We've covered guitarists, drummers and bassists so far so vocalists are finally getting their time in the spotlight...you know, apart from all the time when they're on stage.
As I feel obliged to mention whenever I write a Tenology post, this is not the equivalent of posts proclaiming that Vocalists 1-10 are THE best in Rock and/or Metal, nor is it my personal top 10 list of all time. There are almost certainly going to be talented vocalists that I overlook when writing this (I'm still kicking myself for completely missing a fucking awesome bassist in my last post. I might go back and edit it soon) but as the name suggests, this is merely a 10-person list of vocalists whom I would place on a pedestal.
If I've missed any shining stars that you believe deserve a space more than some of my other entries, feel free to let me know in the comments or via Twitter. However, if they've appeared in previous blog posts for their talents as a different musician (e.g. Geddy Lee of Rush) then you won't find them here, although chances are I value them as a vocalist if they can play and sing simultaneously. Also, be aware that there are some vocalists I have intentionally left out because I personally believe that when it comes to singing, they're a bit shit (or at best, overrated). Here are some of them!

Ozzy Osbourne
Mick Jagger
Bruce Springsteen
Janis Joplin
Bob Dylan
Serj Tankian
Blaze Bayley
Axl Rose

Right, now that we've got that unpleasantness out of the way, let's look at the valuable vocalists!


1. Paul Rodgers

Largely responsible for one of the best live shows I've ever been to

I don't usually write these posts in order of personal ranking but I felt like I had to start this list off on a strong note, so to speak. Paul Rodgers has been in quite a few groups over the years (notably Free and Bad Company, although he also recorded an album with Queen) but I'm mostly counting Paul's contributions as the Bad Company frontman for his placement here. The man's voice is simply incredible; smooth and soulful but able to fully Rock at the drop of a hat. Some of the bands big hits such as "Feel Like Makin' Love" and "Electricland" showcase his ability to flawlessly flip between two different singing styles but if you need even more proof, go and see him perform live. The fact that the man can still belt out the classics after four decades as if he were in the studio laying them down for the first time is the sign of an incredible vocalist.


2. Klaus Meine

No, this isn't Ronnie James Dio

Compared to some vocalists, Klaus Meine probably isn't the first choice for a list of undeniably talented Rock/Metal frontmen but to me, there is no Scorpions without Klaus Meine. His raw vocals are synonymous with the band's own blend of Heavy Metal, whether it's in the band's iconic anthems ("Rock You Like A Hurricane", "Wind Of Change") or lesser known deep cuts ("Catch Your Train", "Another Piece Of Meat"). To me, the sign of a strong Rock/Metal vocalist is the ability to use the sound of their singing voice as its own instrument unique to that band. Some of the vocal melodies sung by Klaus give the songs that extra push that separates them from generic material by other 70s/80s Metal bands, hence his inclusion here.


3. Sean Harris

In an alternate universe, this guy is as popular as everyone else on this list

It's hard to compare the works of former Diamond Head vocalist Sean Harris to the rest of the entries on this list when you factor in that most iconic and well respected Rock/Metal vocalists have had many, many albums to hone their ability and make a splash on the music scene. However, the fact that Sean's only had a couple of albums worth of decent material to show how great he is only adds to my admiration of the man. There was a time when he was hailed as the next Robert Plant and after listening to such tunes as "It's Electric" and "Trick Or Treat", I can understand why. I'm hesitant to describe his singing as "wailing" because it sounds like criticism but if you've ever listened to the band, you'll know what I mean. His vocal work isn't as harsh or aggressive as you'd expect from a Metal band but it still works incredibly well. It's a shame these guys didn't get a bigger break as I imagine we only scratched the surface of what Sean Harris would've been truly capable of.


4. Steve Perry

Not sure if this guy counts as "underrated" but if there's a tier just behind that, this guy's in it

Whilst I'm not the biggest Journey fan on the planet, I would defend Steve Perry's inclusion on this list for one song and one song alone. Naturally he's a great vocalist on a wide range of Journey's material but whenever I think of his work, I always find myself drawn to one clear example of what I would consider his finest hour: "Keep On Runnin'". It's the kind of song that would inspire me to learn to sing just so I could blast it out without sounding like a completely tone-deaf wannabe although I doubt any amount of practise would make me capable of matching his vocals. The verses Rock extra hard because of his singing and the chorus is driven by the sheer power of his voice alone. Your average music fan will probably be impressed by his work on "Don't Stop Believing" and "Open Arms" but seriously, listen to "Keep On Runnin'" if you haven't already and tell me that this guy doesn't have pipes of fucking gold.


5. Stevie Nicks

From Steve to Stevie. If Aerosmith were a bit better, I could've had the hat trick

The first woman to appear on these Tenology posts although she's not the only one worthy enough to grace this list (hint hint). Fleetwood Mac has had a few vocalists but none as significant as Stevie Nicks. Stevie's stage presence and, most importantly, her voice gave the band a specific image; one of mysticism without going into full weird territory like some Prog Rock bands. Female vocalists like Lizzy Hale and Ann Wilson succeed in bringing power to songs through conventional means but Stevie Nicks achieves that same level of pure Rock through her haunting, raspy vocals that were easily responsible for putting Fleetwood Mac on the map. The whole Rumours album is essential listening if you want to hear some of her best work but there's also signature songs from her solo career, even if you think "Edge Of Seventeen" is a bit dull when it comes to the structure.


6. Phil Lynott

Photography 101: black and white makes everything better

I know I mentioned Phil Lynott in the honourable mentions of the bassist blog post BUT he didn't make the main cut so technically he's still a contender for this one. The main reason I didn't give Phil a proper place in the bassist post is because I believe he was a much greater vocalist than a bassist, hence his inclusion here. I mean, his voice was just so fucking cool! When he sung about "the boys" (and let's face it, he sung about 'em quite a bit!), you got the impression that he was not just one of them but one of the more badass ones. At the risk of sounding repetitive, Phil was also skilled at adapting his voice to suit softer or less powerful Rock songs ("Sarah", "Don't Believe A Word") and heavier, fast paced powerhouses ("Cold Sweat", "Angel Of Death"). His voice was so unique, so irreplaceable that his death effectively killed Thin Lizzy once the rest of the band realised there would be no Thin Lizzy without him. Granted they then formed Black Star Riders but if Phil didn't have his incredible voice, you can bet that they would've stuck with the original band name.


7. Biff Byford

Now THAT's a name and a half!

It's no secret that Saxon are one of my favourite bands of all time AND that I feel they're one of the few proper Rock/Metal bands in existence that have only improved with age. If you listen to rerecordings of their classics, they sound so much heavier without losing part of what made Saxon incredible and the main reason for that is Biff Byford's raw vocals. Some of the vocalists here will never be able to recreate the magic they captured in the recording studio all those years ago but to actually surpass it many, many years later is a talent that Biff deserves way more credit for. And yes, his voice is awesome in every single Saxon song that I've heard so far; the perfect Heavy Metal vocals for a band as great as Saxon. I recommend checking out some of the rerecordings on the Heavy Metal Thunder compilation as well as the original recordings to hear how Biff's voice has remained incredible since the early 80s.


8. James Hetfield

Ugh, Metallica. Right? Am I cool yet?

Whilst Hetfield may have gone down in my books on a personal level due to his refusal to flat out denounce Trump (claiming that politics separates people and indirectly stating that he's totally OK with Nazis and shitheads getting joy out of his music), he's still right near the top on a professional level. To me, any vocalist who can play an instrument whilst singing without fucking up either task has a great amount of skill but the fact that James can shred out some pretty fucking heavy riffs from Metallica's back catalogue whilst belting out each line is something I will always admire. James Hetfield is also notable for being one of many singers to be affected by puberty in the 90s, as the rage filled vocals from Metallica's first four Thrash albums gradually sunk into a deeper (but still powerful) tone. However, if you listen to live footage, it's clear that James still has the ability to keep up with his past self so at the very least, he's not the worst member of his own band...aaaand that's all I'm gonna say about that on this post!


9. Eddie Vedder

I'm usually the first to criticise vocalists with an acoustic guitar and stool on stage but I'll make an exception here

I'll admit, I wasn't sure if I was going to choose Eddie Vedder or Chris Cornell for this post. Whilst I like both vocalists a great deal, I think I had to give it to Eddie purely because I'd rather belt out Pearl Jam tracks than Soundgarden ones. Both vocalists have a similar 90s Grunge style to their voice but to me, Eddie's classic drones make for more pleasurable listening than Chris' passionate shouting. I also admire Eddie for adapting his voice with the band's sound from typical Grunge based vocals to modern Alternative ones without compromising the overall quality. There's something uniquely primal about some of his vocals in tracks like "Animal" and "Jeremy" that encapsulates exactly what Rock is about; releasing the beast. That's why Eddie's here!


10. Bruce Dickinson

Nearly made it to the end without mentioning Iron Maiden...but that was never gonna happen

If you've been keeping up with these Tenology posts so far, you'll know I've listed at least one member of Iron Maiden in each post so far and with bloody good reason. They are my number one favourite band and I firmly believe that each member brings their own skills to the table to create a unified, incredible sound. However, if you have to single out one driving force behind the band's success (and you don't know about Steve Harris), you'll probably pick Bruce Dickinson due to his operatic, screeching vocals that propelled the band away from the Punk sound they were dangerously close to solidifying with in their first two albums. Bruce has a supreme vocal range, great songwriting talents and knows how to be a top notch (if not slightly outspoken) frontman. Final cherry on top? The guy had throat cancer not long ago and kicked it right in the fucking cunt before releasing a brand new Iron Maiden studio album AND going on tour to promote it. Top bloke indeed.


So those are the ten vocalists I've selected but that's not to say there aren't other great vocalists who leapt to the front of my mind as I was thinking about great voices in the world of Rock/Metal. Here are some slightly fleshed out Honourable Mentions along with reasons why I didn't choose them to be listed up above.

Ronnie James Dio

No, this isn't Klaus Meine

Arguably the greatest voice in all of Metal and quite possibly one of the most talented, considering he's been in three iconic Rock/Metal bands (Rainbow, Black Sabbath, Dio) along with several smaller outfits. Out of the three main bands he's been a part of, I'd rate his tenure with Black Sabbath at number one simply because his vocals had all the power with none of the...hmmm, how should I put this...pomposity? There's something a bit ridiculous about some of his vocals in Rainbow and Dio tunes as if he took himself a little bit too seriously. It takes me out of the music when I hear him trying to vocally simulate the sound of a door slamming or shouting "NO! NO!" over and over again. He was a great vocalist but a little too absurd at times.


Chris Cornell

"Come at me, bruh"

I've already gone into a bit of detail about why I chose Eddie Vedder over Chris Cornell for the main list but come on, I couldn't just completely ignore him. I wrote a Rapid Fire post looking at three albums by three bands/projects Chris Cornell sung in after he died where I praised his voice and songwriting abilities as half the reason why Audioslave are worth listening to. The guy's influence is peppered throughout modern Rock (notably Shinedown) and similar to Anthony Kiedis, Chris' vocals are much better when he's singing softer songs. However, since I prefer Soundgarden to his solo work, I feel like I never got the best out of the guy based on what I've heard.


Brad Delp

Another great vocalist who took his own life

Boston definitely aren't one of my favourite bands but their debut is easily one of my all-time favourite albums. I've talked about why various times but I feel like I haven't really focused too much on Brad Delp's contributions to it. Sure, he had a sweet sounding voice but there's some genuine talent buried beneath the music. Take "More Than A Feeling" and that section before the final chorus where Brad hits that high "slipped away"; that's fucking impressive, especially with how long he holds it for. The main reason he isn't in the list above is simply that I feel other vocalists deserved it more with their wider selection of records and talents that were showcased, but I still think Brad Delp deserves a shout out here.


Grace Slick

Get it? "GRACE this list"???

Similar to Fleetwood Mac, Jefferson Airplane also had shared vocalist duties that most people will probably agree was easily dominated by the sheer talent of the female artist. However, whilst Stevie Nicks rocked the mystic, Classic Rock oriented vocals, Grace Slick locked down the psychedelic style and I wouldn't be surprised to learn that she helped inspire Stevie's stage presence too. Overall, I couldn't deny that Stevie was the superior vocalist but tracks like "White Rabbit", "Somebody To Love", "Law Man" and even backing vocals in "Volunteers" showcase an incredible voice at work, I felt like this voice didn't quite match some of the others in the list above.


Roger Taylor

Just give me a paragraph to explain myself, that's all I ask!

Yeah, I picked one of the OTHER band members who shared vocalist duties from Queen. There are two reasons for this. 1) We all know Freddie Mercury was an amazing vocalist, probably one of (if not THE) best in this list. I didn't feel the need to place him here when I felt like other vocalists deserved more recognition or my personal take on why they're great although yes, I do think Freddie was a fantastic frontman. 2) Some of you may not know that Queen's drummer, Roger Taylor, took the helm for a few tracks and did a pretty fucking great job. Songs like "I'm In Love With My Car", "Rock It (Prime Jive)", "More Of That Jazz" and (my personal favourite) "Fight From The Inside" all feature Roger on lead vocals and whilst Freddie will always be instantly more recognisable as a vocalist and frontman, I personally believe Roger successfully held his own and provided a more aggressive side to the Rock band that Freddie could never quite pull off to the same degree. However, since Roger isn't exactly the band's main vocalist in the same way that everyone else in the post is, I felt Honourable Mention was the best place to shine a light on Roger Taylor's vocal work.


So that's my list of valuable vocalists in Rock/Metal! I hope you enjoyed reading and waiting two months at a time for each Tenology related to band members. Next year, I might revisit these in some format but for now, all four key band members have been accounted for!
COMING SOON: I dunno, maybe something Christmassy. Probably not though.

Thursday, 21 September 2017

Tenology: Brilliant Bassists In Rock/Metal

Continuing my series of Tenology posts looking at skilled musicians, this week's list focuses on bass players who stand out as being particularly memorable or talented at their profession. The bassline in your typical Rock song is usually fairly straightforward, designed to add a bit of extra weight to the music by thudding out a steady rhythm without really contributing anything special. However, some artists choose to shoot for the stars, boasting the technical skill to play bass solos or play bass whilst simultaneously singing.
This opinion based list will look at ten bassists whom I admire for doing more than just...well, playing the bass. As always, this isn't a "Top 10 Greatest/Favourite Bass Players" piece; it's just a sample of ten bassists I would personally rate highly. If there are any bass players that you believe deserve to be here over others who are absent from this list, feel free to let me know in the comments or via Twitter although keep in mind that their absence doesn't necessarily mean I think they're not worthy of recognition.


1. Billy Sheehan

This is the guy The Beatles sung about in "With A Little Help From My Friends"...don't look it up

Whilst there are some famous examples of great bassists who'll be making an appearance a bit later on in the list, Billy Sheehan's technical skill probably surpasses every entry on this list combined. His tapping techniques and all-round versatility even rival most guitarists but sadly, he's one of those musicians who's immense talent never fully made it to the studio. Sure, you've got songs like "Addicted To That Rush" - Mr. Big with exceptional bass but most of Mr Big's better known tracks are usually driven by guitar or vocals. Compare this to live covers of "Burn" - Deep Purple and "Baba O'Riley" - The Who where Billy flawlessly shreds out the organ and violin solos respectively and you'll ask yourself why they never truly utilised his skills off-stage.


2. Cliff Burton

The first of several great bassists who are sadly no longer with us

Whilst Metallica songs are generally known for their epic guitar riffs and diminishing quality over time, their first three albums also contain tracks with surprisingly prominent bass. There's "Orion", a track named due to the spacey bass solo, "For Whom The Bell Tolls" with the creepy bass riff in the intro and of course "(Anesthesia)--Pulling Teeth", a four minute fuzzy bass solo off the debut that could damn near be confused for guitar if not for the vocal intro. Cliff also proved to be capable of keeping up with Hetfield and Hammett, matching and occasionally improving on their guitar riffs for most of their signature songs. Unfortunately, Cliff passed away in 1986 after the tour bus they were travelling in skidded out of control and crashed, crushing him in the process. His riffs may not have stood out in the same way as the guitar melodies but it's fair to say the band's music was never quite the same after his passing.


3. Steve Harris

Obligatory Iron Maiden

Steve's been regarded as the greatest bass player of all time and whilst I don't know if I'd personally agree with that, he definitely deserves a spot on this list. He's the soul of Iron Maiden, not just in his bass playing but in his songwriting and musical knowledge too. He's usually the driving force behind each musical decision the band has made and thankfully, he's still going strong to this date. Whilst Iron Maiden's success is down to a team effort rather than any one member of the band standing out, Steve's bass is always present among the guitars, adding the final puzzle piece to songs like "The Trooper" and "Run To The Hills" that wouldn't be complete without him.


4. Chris Squire

I could've used a picture of a younger Chris but come on, look at that fucking bass!

I'm not the biggest fan of Yes but if you listen to some of their better tracks, one thing's for certain; the bass stands out like a DVD in a game collection. Tracks like "Roundabout" and "Starship Trooper" contain basslines almost as complex as the guitar melodies and even though their Pop-Prog phase focused a bit more on the guitar hooks and vocals, you can still hear Chris keeping things steady. His aggressive, dynamic playing style has gone on to influence several of the bassists on this list and even though he sadly passed away in 2015, his work across all Yes albums lives on as a gold standard for Prog Rock (and indeed standard Rock) bassists for the rest of time.


5. Geezer Butler

Real name Terence Michael Joseph Matthew Mark Luke John Napoleon Ulysses Hank "Geezer" Butler

From one of Prog Rock's most influential bassists to Heavy Metal's, Geezer Butler is responsible for giving Black Sabbath the weight it needed to be one of the biggest Metal bands on the planet. His heavy riffs and lyrical influences ranging from religion to dystopian science fiction gave the band the apocalyptic doom vibe that would go on to form the cultural perception of Heavy Metal for years to come. Geezer stuck with Black Sabbath through the Dio years and took part in their recent farewell tour, also contributing to some of Ozzy Osbourne's solo albums in the 90s but nobody really cares about that. The main thing is his work with Black Sabbath, giving us excellent songs such as "Children Of The Grave", "War Pigs" and of course "N.I.B" to inspire generations of bassists for decades.


6. John Entwistle

The Who's secret weapon

Generally regarded as one of Rock's greatest bass players, John Entwistle truly knew how to turn bass up to 11. With full treble and thundering dynamics, every riff and lick laid down by John sounded like a distant roar and when he wanted to shred, boy could he shred. The most common example of his exceptional skills is probably "My Generation" with its iconic bass solo but tracks on the Live At Leeds album showcase his ability to keep up with Townshend and Moon on guitar and drums respectively. Once again, this incredible musician is no longer with us, dying in 2002 due to a drug overdose.


7. Geddy Lee

Give me some credit, I made it this far without mentioning him

The other great Prog Rock bassist on this list and probably the go-to example of everyone's favourite Rock bassist in general. Rush songs are known for their great bass melodies and Geddy's unique vocals that he flawlessly pulls off whilst playing the relatively complex basslines. Not only that but he's also responsible for the keyboard and synth for each track, something the band is equally reliant on for some of their signature hits. Songs like "Fly By Night" and "Tom Sawyer" showcase Geddy's supreme multi-tasking abilities whilst tracks such as "Freewill" and "YYZ" contain multiple bass solos, sometimes underneath the guitar one. He's probably one of my top bassists and there's a strong chance he's one of yours too.


8. John Deacon

For ages, I always confused John Deacon and Roger Taylor

When it comes to the best members of Queen, John Deacon tends to be at the bottom of most conventional rankings (especially when you consider Roger Taylor's vocal work on News Of The World, arguably providing better Hard Rock vocals than Freddie). However, when you actually listen to the bass in most Queen songs, there's a lot to be admired. It may not be technical or balanced with complex vocals but there's something to be said for simplistic yet permanently catchy basslines. Some of Queen's best known tracks like "Another One Bites The Dust" and "Under Pressure" are built entirely around John Deacon with the rest of the band members following his lead. Unfortunately, after Freddie Mercury's death and subsequent tribute show, John retired from music and hasn't played with Queen or been involved in any of their post-Freddie projects for about 20 years now. Fair play, I suppose.


9. John McVie

He's got it all, from the facial hair to the first name John

For the most part, this post has basically consisted of fairly obvious choices that you'd find populating the higher end of most great bass player lists. However, rather than going for one of the bigger Rock/Metal names that everyone already admires, I thought I'd dedicate a slot to classic Fleetwood Mac bassist, John McVie. He deserves a place for co-writing and performing on "The Chain" alone, a song containing one of the greatest bass riffs ever written, but he's also shown off his talents for other great Fleetwood Mac tracks too such as "Oh Well", "World Turning" and "Tusk". All in all, John's probably the most underrated bassist on this list so feel free to blast some Fleetwood Mac with the bass turned all the way up to show him some extra love.


10. Flea

"Flea? He's not Lemmy!"

As always, the last musician on the list is something a bit special. Flea (real name Michael Balzary) has played bass with the Red Hot Chili Peppers since their debut in 1984 and also acted in a few films such as The Big Lebowski and the Back To The Future sequels. However, his work as the RHCP bassist will always reign supreme as his blend of funky licks and heavy riffs have helped put the band on the musical map. You can always tell it's a RHCP song when you hear his soulful, often dominant bass melodies but if you want a few prime examples to check out over the course of their career...well, aside from practically every song they've ever written, I'd recommend "By The Way", "Higher Ground", "Soul To Squeeze", "Walkabout" and "Dreams Of A Samurai".


Even though these are ten bass players whom I've deemed worthy enough to focus specific paragraphs about, there are still some bassists that deserve honourable mentions:
Paul McCartney
John Myung
Phil Lynott
Lemmy
Every Funk bassist

Did I miss anyone out by focusing too much on big name bass players? Let me know who ranks on your personal list with some samples of their work to check out.

COMING SOON: The Salentino Cuts - UFO, an album review or showdown post; I haven't decided yet.

Monday, 31 July 2017

Rapid Fire: Metallica, Judas Priest, Black Tide

Hastily typed up Rapid Fire post time!
This time, it's all about the Metal. Three Metal albums by three Metal bands, plain and simple. I've gone for a mix of iconic "masterpiece", fan favourite and hidden gem in my selection but overall, I'd recommend all of these albums to different people for varying reasons. Objectively speaking, there isn't really a dud in the bunch although this first album is easily the worst. You'll know that's a controversial statement if you've already taken a peek at the album in question but I stand by my reasons, which you can read about below.


1. Master Of Puppets - Metallica


A lot of metalheads claim this is Metallica's best album (or their last great album, depending on how much of a dick they are). Whilst it does have several top notch tracks, I was pretty disappointed the first time I listened to this. I'd just come off Ride The Lightning (their ACTUAL best album) and had high hopes for the album that was supposedly a superior follow-up but there were several irritating little niggles I had. For starters, the tracks were needlessly long.
I accept that this is kind of Metallica's thing, longer Metal songs with a sensitive intro and a shitload of riffs, but this album goes overboard. The shortest song on Master Of Puppets is album opener, "Battery" and even that song could've trimmed some of the fat from the outro. The riffs and solos come hard and heavy but the song's so busy being angry that it forgets to be enjoyable, in my eyes. Then there's the title track, "Master Of Puppets", a song with much better riffs and a sensitive section in the middle, slowing the entire song down before a solo that blows its load too early yet simultaneously goes on too long before bringing it back around to the intro riff.
The rest of the album can be divided into three sections: short yet forgettable Thrash Metal ("Leper Messiah" "Damage, Inc."), well crafted but dull Heavy Metal ("The Thing That Should Not Be", "Welcome Home (Sanitarium)") and great but long standouts ("Disposable Heroes", "Orion"). The album is full of emotional contradictions and lacks a single solid punch compared to the previous two albums; I'm not saying Kill Em All and Ride The Lightning are perfect but they do have perfect tracks, unlike Master Of Puppets which is full of nice tries.

1. Battery
2. Master Of Puppets
3. The Thing That Should Not Be
4. Welcome Home (Sanitarium)
5. Disposable Heroes
6. Leper Messiah
7.Orion
8. Damage, Inc.
ALBUM RATING - 5/10

If you're still reading after I just pissed on a critically acclaimed album, time for a record from the band who are responsible for the name of these specific blog posts.


2. Screaming For Vengeance - Judas Priest


I was torn between discussing this, British Steel or Painkiller but in the end, I chose my personal favourite. From the epic cover to the final track, there isn't a single bad song or misstep on Screaming For Vengeance. Album overture "The Hellion" works as an introduction for the true album opener, "Electric Eye". Great driving rhythm, awesome lyrics, a sweet solo and excellent riffs throughout. The bar is set high by this track but unlike other releases by the band (looking at you, Redeemer Of Souls), it's a record that's constantly broken over the course of the album.
The album's big hit was "You've Got Another Thing Comin'" and as good as the song is if you're after radio friendly material, it's dwarfed by proper Heavy Metal B-sides. Whether you like your Metal fast and furious ("Screaming For Vengeance") or slow and melodic ("Devil's Child"), the variety presented across the album is enough for any fan of the genre. There are a few tracks that almost stray into Hard Rock material ("Fever", "Pain And Pleasure") but fortunately the band are able to claw it back.
Whilst British Steel might be preferable to those who like their Metal to contain a certain raw quality and Painkiller is easily the superior album if you're after pure aggression in music form, Screaming For Vengeance is a perfect example of how to spruce up and polish a product without ruining it by making it sound bloated and unnecessarily extravagant. The Metal is still pure and even though Judas Priest made some questionable decisions throughout the course of their career, at least they gave us this.

1. The Hellion
2. Electric Eye
3. Riding On The Wind
4. Bloodstone
5. (Take These) Chains
6. Pain And Pleasure
7. Screaming For Vengeance
8. You've Got Another Thing Comin'
9. Fever
10. Devil's Child
ALBUM RATING - 9/10

Finally, rounding off our Metal trilogy is a band who gave us an incredible debut followed by utter, utter shite.


3. Light From Above - Black Tide


Black Tide started off in their teens before being picked up by a major record label, usually a sign that the band are shit but malleable to the point that their music means nothing. However, unlike similar artists who absolutely fucking suck (like The Warning), Black Tide were at least able to give us one excellent album before changing their material to a more edgy teen-friendly sound. Light From Above can probably be considered part of the NWOTHM subgenre as it has all the hallmarks of an album from the 80s, only with better audio quality.
Album opener "Shockwave" starts things off with a bang (hurr hurr), giving us blistering riffs and solos with catchy vocals from start to finish and they don't stop there. The album contains high quality Heavy Metal without resorting to sensitive ballads or Metal operas like most American or modern Metal outfits, making it a rare treat for fans of heavy music and purists who have become disillusioned by the decline in the genre alike.
Of course, since it is just pure Metal, you're less likely to get as much out of it as you are with more progressive music containing various sections and a wider variety of riffs but that doesn't mean there aren't tracks where the band push themselves to come up with something more than your average Metal anthem ("Warriors Of Time", "Light From Above"). Plus, they do a damn good cover of Metallica's "Hit The Lights" so the band deserve some credit. It's a shame they turned into a bunch of whiny Metalcore pussies after this album but at least Light From Above still exists as a testament to why you shouldn't let record labels shit on you just because they're the ones with the money. Be more like Iron Maiden, less like Black Tide.

1. Shockwave
2. Shout
3. Warriors Of Time
4. Give Me A Chance
5. Let Me
6. Show Me The Way
7. Enterprise
8. Live Fast Die Young
9. Hit The Lights
10. Black Abyss
11. Light From Above
ALBUM RATING - 8/10

That's it for July! Hopefully August will have a few more album reviews/discussions and less video game music, as I kind of went too far with that this month.

Saturday, 31 December 2016

Tenology: My Ten Favourite Rock/Metal Songs Of 2016

Finally, we're here. The end of 2016 and about fucking time too. From celebrity deaths to celebrity presidents, it's been an absolute shitshow that all seemed to start with Lemmy's death at the end of last year.
However, despite the overwhelming negatives about 2016, there have been some positives to take away such as a collection of decent Rock/Metal songs that I intend to list here. On previous Tenology posts celebrating the year's music, I don't categorise songs in order of greatness; instead, I just list ten of my personal favourite songs from the year in random order. Since there's no reason to change the formula, that's exactly what I'll be doing this year too!
It's also worth noting that these songs have been chosen based entirely on my opinion, not how well they charted or fared among Rock/Metal fans. If I wanted to write about the "best" songs of the year, I'd spend the whole post wanking off about how amazing Beyonce and Radiohead are. But fuck that, right? Here are 10 songs I liked!


1. "The Getaway" - Red Hot Chili Peppers

If you cast your mind back to July (or click this link and spend a couple of minutes reading the post), you may recall me reviewing The Getaway - Red Hot Chili Peppers and talking about how much I loved this album. It's probably joint-first for my album of the year along with Dystopia - Megadeth and this album opener/title track is a solid reason why. It sounds like classic RHCP but at the same time doesn't feel like the band going through the motions, partly due to Josh Klinghoffer picking up the strings from John Frusciante. Great tune!


2. "Breathing Lightning" - Anthrax

If your mind hasn't returned from July yet (or you got curious and followed this link), you may ALSO recall me briefly writing about the new Anthrax album, For All Kings. Despite not really enjoying it, I did love this song and would recommend it if you like Heavy Metal over the usual Thrash stuff Anthrax is known for. Thankfully, there are some single edits of the song that don't have the shitty instrumental reprise at the end so if you want to buy the track, search for that version instead of the six minute one.


3. "Let It Begin" - The Treatment

Aha, a new track! I've mentioned The Treatment before on a previous Tenology post celebrating 2014's music but this song is stronger than "The Outlaw". It's still another uncompromising Hard Rock track with epic riffs and a catchy chorus by a band who seem to be happy in the ass-kicking-Rock sector of the industry so what's not to like? In a year literally plagued with death and despair, sometimes you need a good Hard Rock track to blast out loud and this song fits the bill nicely.


4. "Moth Into Flame" - Metallica

Back to old tracks again. I liked Metallica's new album and there were definitely some solid contenders on there for this post. However, there was only one track that I knew deserved to be on the main list without a doubt; "Moth Into Flame". Unlike "Hardwired" and "Atlas, Rise!", it contains all the hallmarks of a top quality Metallica song without sounding repetitive or losing too much energy throughout the track. It should've been the lead single from the album as it triumphantly declares "We're fucken back!" much more heroically than the album's title track.


5. "At War With The World" - Primal Fear

I haven't actually discussed Rulebreaker - Primal Fear on the blog yet but if you haven't listened to it, it's a pretty awesome Metal album. Granted there's not much variety on it but if you want pure Heavy Metal, you get exactly that. There were several songs I could've picked for this list but my personal favourite is probably this one due to the steady rhythm and epic chorus. Seriously though, if you like Heavy Metal, seek out Rulebreaker - Primal Fear.


6. "Breakin' Outta Hell" - Airbourne

A track so good, I've discussed it twice; once in an album review, once in a taster session. Basically, similar to "Let It Begin", it's a heavy Hard Rock song by a band that are masters of awesome singles but getting progressively weaker at awesome albums. Despite this, I still love listening to this song and hope that Airbourne will keep churning 'em out every couple of years or so.


7. "The Emperor" - Megadeth

Come on, I couldn't leave out a track from Dystopia from this post. I'll admit that if "The Threat Is Real" wasn't released as a single at the end of 2015, I would've chosen that instead but "The Emperor" is probably my second favourite track off the album. Lyrically and musically, it's fucking great; a song flipping the middle finger off at incompetent leaders with brilliant riffs throughout and a hell of a sweet solo with echoes of "Holy Wars... The Punishment Due".


8. "When The Night Comes In" - Black Star Riders

If you're unfamiliar with Black Star Riders, they're basically a heavier version of Thin Lizzy made up of Thin Lizzy band members who didn't want to record new material for that band without Phil Lynott. I've heard quite a few of their songs and definitely like some more than others ("Valley Of The Stones" over "Bound For Glory", any day) but this is my favourite so far and it just so happens to be a single released this year. If you like Thin Lizzy and heavier music, I'd recommend them unless you're a die-hard Phil Lynott fan, as the vocalist sounds like a poorer version of him and it'd probably just piss you off.


9. "Eye Of The Beholder" - Wolfmother

Another song from an album I've already reviewed. Similar to Dystopia, this might not be my favourite song off the album but it IS my favourite off the songs released this year. It's got your standard trippy apocalypse sound that Wolfmother have cultivated through the use of organ and fuzzy guitars but when you get to the halfway point, the track picks up a bit and shifts gear into full-on Rock. It's a shame they couldn't add a guitar solo to that section but it's still great.


10. "Goodbye Angels" - Red Hot Chili Peppers

What's this? ANOTHER Red Hot Chili Peppers song? Technically, I never said I couldn't include multiple songs by the same band on this post and if I'm being totally honest, I would rate this higher than most of the songs in this list and upcoming honourable mentions. It's not a balls-out riff-heavy Rock anthem but it is pure RHCP at their finest, which is saying something without Frusciante involved. I may have been hasty in the past when I claimed the song would be better without Flea's little bass solo before the outro but having given it some thought, I think it works better that way after all. My personal favourite song off The Getaway and maybe, JUST MAYBE, my favourite song of 2016.

Those were my ten favourite songs from 2016 (that I heard and will probably change over time) but that's not to say everything else was rubbish. Here are five tracks that could've made the list if not for the strength of the ten above:


"Bullets & Tears" - Primal Fear

As I said when writing about "At War With The World", I could've chosen from a few songs for the list and if not for that track, this would've made it instead. I can imagine this track being fucking amazing live when that chorus comes around and for that reason, I love listening to it. However, even though I included two RHCP tracks on the list, I couldn't remove one of my top ten for another Primal Fear song.


"Medication For The Melancholy" - Rob Zombie

Yeah, Rob Zombie released an album this year. I should probably listen to it if only to seek out tracks like this. He doesn't do them often but when Rob speeds up the tempo, he fucking rocks. I didn't include this track because it sounds like just another Rob Zombie track off one of his previous albums and I've already got enough of them in my list. I went with Airbourne instead because I can honestly say I prefer "Breakin' Outta Hell" to this, although it's still a great Heavy Metal tune.


"See You Rise" - Diamond Head

Considering how much I said I enjoyed Diamond Head - Diamond Head in my review this year, some of you might be confused as to why I didn't include any tracks in the main list. I do still love the album and "See You Rise" is still my favourite track off it but it just couldn't beat the others on the list. If it didn't have the slower section in the middle, it may have done.


"This Train" - Joe Bonamassa

I don't think I'll ever quite understand why everyone seems to rave about Joe Bonamassa so much when most of the songs I've heard him involved in are just alright but I have to say, this track is pretty solid. It's a fun Blues number, which makes a change from just about every other popular modern Blues track in existence. It's not strong enough to take on any of the main ten but it deserves a mention here.


"Thundering Voices" - Rival Sons

A late entry, as I only heard this track a couple of days ago. I'm sure I've talked about Rival Sons before and how they're a decent Rock band who probably deserve more attention than I'm currently giving them but the reason I didn't include this on the main list is simple; the other tracks have had some time to get old (except the Black Star Riders one, but I know I'll still like that months from now) and I still enjoy listening to them. I can't say the same about this song yet but who knows, maybe I'll still like it in February next year when we're all absolutely shitting ourselves over what the world has become.

That's all from me this year. I hope you enjoyed my 52 posts and your 2017 is better than 2016...unless you're partly to majorly responsible for how shit 2016 turned out, in which case I sincerely hope your next 365 days are utter wank.

Friday, 18 November 2016

Hardwired...To Self-Destruct - Metallica

Well, it's finally here. Metallica's latest proper studio album since Death Magnetic eight years ago. Enough waffle, let's do this!


Metallica have to be the most simultaneously well known, well loved and well despised Metal bands in all of existence. However when they hide away for years, only coming out occasionally to drop a big steaming collaborative turd and a few live rats on our doorstep, everyone's going to be intrigued when they finally get it together and produce a fully fledged studio album, let alone a double one! That's right, this is the first double album Metallica have released so they must have spent a long time planning some awesome music, right?
I mean, if you've been keeping up with Metal related chatter, you must be aware of all the non-news stories about random members of Metallica saying "We have [INSERT NUMBER HERE] riffs lined up!" or "We're about [INSERT FRACTION HERE] way through recording!", building up two years worth of hype. SURELY after setting the bar so high, the band that gave us such brilliant songs as "Creeping Death" and "One" would be able to deliver? The short answer is Yes...half of it does. The long answer is several paragraphs long and funnily enough, it's just below this sentence.

Album opener, lead single and title track "Hardwired" is, unintentionally, the best example of the album's ultimate flaw; it's half-great. It's punchy, it's got a few decent Metallica riffs and it's the band giving it both barrels. Unfortunately, it could've done with more decent Metallica riffs, the lyrics in the chorus are too close to a line from a Tenacious D song for me to take it seriously and it's over just when it gets good. It's the shortest song on the album and it's the only one that I feel needs to be over six minutes. It's a terrible lead single, an acceptable title track and, if it was a bit more Metallica-y, it would've made for a great album opener.
As for the rest of the album, it could've been amazing or just great overall if they didn't blow their load on the first disc. However, if we're judging the album based on individual discs then the first disc is a fucking classic. It has tunes that remind fans that Metallica can still get it up in the fast paced Heavy and Thrash Metal department ("Atlas, Rise!", "Moth Into Flame"), along with slower tracks containing an abundance of top quality riffs well placed to prevent typical Metallica songs from becoming a bit stale, clearly taking influence from Black Album material and peers such as Judas Priest and Iron Maiden ("Dream No More", "Now That We're Dead", "Halo Of Fire").
You can argue that even those songs have their flaws ("Halo Of Fire" should've been a wee bit shorter to get to the fantastic outro quicker) but on the whole, this is what the whole album should've been. A mix of energetic Thrash Metal and slower Heavy Metal, chock full of enough guitar to give Metalheads something to sink their teeth into for weeks. However, the second disc fails on almost every level to continue the momentum set by these first six songs and the sad thing is it could've been easily remedied.

Instead of balancing fast and slow songs, the second disc is heavily populated by pure filler. Bland, plodding Metal that's a complete wet blanket after hearing the first half of the record. It opens with "Confusion", a decent track but mostly unimpressive and too safe for the first song on the second disc. If this was the only "good, not great" song, there wouldn't be a problem but that's just the beginning. It's a solid five song block of slower material without a wake-up slap of any kind in the middle.
Inspiration from older albums, particularly ...And Justice For All and Metallica, is still here ("Here Comes Revenge") and a couple of songs have similarities between other Metal bands such as Megadeth and modern Black Sabbath ("Am I Savage?" and "ManUNkind" respectively) but not in a good way (is there even a good way with modern Black Sabbath?). Musically, it's atypical to your standard Metallica tracks but it doesn't work here, at least not without some of the juice from the first disc in between. However, the biggest slap in the face has to be "Murder One", another track that gets it half right and half disastrously, catastrophically, embarrassingly wrong.
Lyrically, it's excellent. It's a suitable tribute to Lemmy, combining titles from Motorhead songs to form something new that both celebrates the band's legacy and empowers the memory of Lemmy. Musically, it's piss weak. It's a damp slog, not the kind of music I associate with Motorhead. Why the hell didn't they pump some anger and passion into this tribute, it could've been fantastic! Lemmy deserved something blisteringly hot, not mildly tepid. Failing that, if they weren't feeling angry, why not make it more heartfelt? Why not have a go at harnessing the creative talent used to write "Fade To Black" or "The Unforgiven" into one last goodbye to the Magnificent Bastard of Metal (or rather Rock & Roll)? In my eyes, it's a swing and a colossal miss.

The one saving grace is that the second half ends on something with a pulse; "Spit Out The Bone". THIS would've been a great album opener, not "Hardwired". It's the missing spark from the second disc that finally has Rob Trujillo doing something on bass, most likely placed at the end of the album to fool listeners into thinking the whole album was pumped full of power. However, for anyone who can store at least an hour in their short term memory, it's too little and too late. So how could they have salvaged it and made the whole album brilliant instead of just the first half?
The answer is simple; all they needed was one great song, placed between "Here Comes Revenge" and "Am I Savage?", or better yet, replacing one of those. It would've given listeners more variety and helped strengthen the belief that Metallica have written another incredible album. If only they had another song spare; not just any song, one that's fast, furious and proven to be awesome...OH HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE, they did! It's called "Lords Of Summer" and it was shunted onto another Deluxe Edition as the first track.
I could rant about how cheap this is on the band's part but the fact is I already have, right here. I'm not going to type it out again because then you'd be receiving the same content repackaged slightly differently and this isn't the Deluxe Edition review of the new Metallica album...OK, I've had digs at Deluxe Edition albums before but if they're going to keep making them, I'm going to keep ripping on them.

For all my criticising, Hardwired...To Self-Destruct isn't a bad album. It's a flawed, imperfect album that would've been handled much better by a band who perhaps weren't as motivated by money but overall, they've done well to mix elements of their "best" albums from the past with what they got right in Death Magnetic. It's clear that they'll never be pure Thrash again but they're still pretty damn heavy when they want to be and can produce enough top quality Metal to fill at least one single album.
However, it desperately needed something in the middle to shoot some life into it before it was over. Metallica came out hard and fast on the first disc but spent too long catching their breath during the second one. This wouldn't have been as big a problem if the first four songs they released to the public weren't 80% of the fast material on the album, akin to giving away all if not most of the CGI money shots of a film in the trailer, but it's happened now and I rate it 6/10 (would've been a strong 7 with "Lords Of Summer").
If you like Metal riffs regardless of the rest of the song, this is a brilliant album and I would recommend it on the basis that it's full of them. If you were hoping for something energetic as teased in the singles/title track, you'll probably be disappointed but will likely get over it when you listen to "Moth Into Flame" a few times. If you think Metallica have been shit since 1991 but still intend on listening to it just so you can shitpost about Lars ruining your favourite band, sod off into your bathroom or kitchen or wherever you keep the bleach and pour yourself a pint to celebrate how fucking elite you are, you precious little darling.

Friday, 12 August 2016

Rapid Fire: Pearl Jam, The Offspring, Metallica

Apologies for the lack of posts but I've been spending my time listening to a load of old albums I've been meaning to catch up on, some of which are included in this post.
Similar to the first Rapid Fire post, I'll be briefly discussing three albums (this time, all from the 90s!) and giving my verdict on each of them. I may consider doing similar posts to this where I link the three albums via genre or decade...or I'll keep on doing three random albums that I've listened to, who knows.

1. Ten - Pearl Jam


I listened to this album a while ago and wasn't hugely impressed. I'd heard it was widely regarded as their best work (even though it is their first album) and contains at least three of their signature songs along with fan favourites in the form of filler tracks. In reality, it's good but if anything it's more responsible for shaping the sound of Alternative Rock, particularly from the Seattle region. A combination of Eddie Vedder's vocals and a variety of soft and heavy riffing from Mike McCready made it easily accessible to 90s listeners and revisiting it, it still holds up today.
I can't say I'm totally down with that, as I'm a bigger fan of the Riff Based Rock of the 70s, and whilst this album features plenty of epic riffs, they're all located in the three lead singles (hence my indifference to most of the filler tracks). In my eyes, it's definitely a solid album but much like a summer blockbuster with all the impressive CGI-filled action scenes in the trailers, Ten suffers from being arguably too reliant on mainstream Alternative singles. "Even Flow", "Jeremy" and "Alive" are fantastic tracks but once you've heard them, there's not really a good reason to stick with the album unless you're a fan of more soulful Rock.
Luckily, this album doesn't make the same mistake Aerosmith made in the 90s, having the band members decide that they're actually more sensitive than the Rock N Roll rebels who sung about getting sucked off in a lift. Even the softer tracks have an abrasive side, making this a good Rock album and a great Rock debut, although it's no Boston or On Through The Night.

1. Once
2. Even Flow
3. Alive
4. Why Go
5. Black
6. Jeremy
7. Oceans
8. Porch
9. Garden
10. Deep
11. Release
ALBUM RATING - 6/10


2. Smash - The Offspring


Another notable album from the 90s in the form of Pop Punk outfit, The Offspring. Say what you want about this particular genre of music but The Offspring know how to make a fun album, unlike some of their peers. Sure, most of the tracks sound the same apart from the token Ska Punk track ("What Happened To You?") and sometimes Dexter Holland's vocals grate a little bit ("Bad Habit") but much like Disturbed and Motorhead, if you like their general sound then you'd be wise to give their albums a proper listen.
Much like the previous album on this post, singles released from Smash stray from that sound into more chart friendly territory ("Come Out And Play" and "Self Esteem") but these songs are still great in their own way. As for the filler tracks, they've got more energy than a toddler on Red Bull and speed, boasting frenzied guitar work and frantic drumming perfect for as many fisheye lens Jackass montages and Tony Hawks Pro Skater soundtracks as you could ever dream of.
This album will probably lose its appeal quickly if you like the kind of variety Prog Rock or Indie/Alternative bands tend to offer but if you're prone to the occasional bout of Pop Punk, this is a good album to dig into. I would argue that it's as good as Ixnay On The Hombre, their less successful follow up album that's more or less the same release only without the chart friendly mainstream Rock tracks.

1. Time To Relax
2. Nitro (Youth Energy)
3. Bad Habit
4. Gotta Get Away
5. Genocide
6. Something To Believe In
7. Come Out And Play
8. Self Esteem
9. It'll Be A Long Time
10. Killboy Powerhead
11. What Happened To You?
12. So Alone
13. Not The One
14. Smash
ALBUM RATING - 7/10


3. Metallica - Metallica


I'd been putting off listening to this album for so long due to the negative reaction in the Metal community. Now I've finally listened to it start to finish, I have one question to ask: why the fuck do people hate this album? It may not be as Thrash as Ride The Lightning or ...And Justice For All but it's a decent Metal album! This is a good example of a band trying something new and creating something that doesn't suck, unlike every band that "experiments" and always ends up creating something that everyone fucking hates because it's half arsing two genres.
Keeping in line with the mainstream Rock theme, this album saw Metallica bringing Metal to MTV with "Enter Sandman", a song with an epic riff that everyone shits on even though it's probably the heaviest and most awesome song about sleep you'll ever hear. It also gave us a power ballad in the form of "Nothing Else Matters", a song that sounds a shitload better if you speed it up 25% (as first proven in this handy blog post here!), and a bunch of Heavy Metal singles inspired by Westerns ("The Unforgiven") and even some of their old material ("Sad But True" essentially being the "Blaze Of Glory" to "Harvester Of Sorrow"'s "Wanted Dead Or Alive"...you still with me?).
However, if you judge the album entirely on those tracks, you'll probably think it's fairly mediocre. Nobody ever seems to talk about the filler tracks though, as those are easily the album highlights. "Holier Than Thou" and "The Struggle Within" could easily belong on previous albums but I guess it's easy to ignore them when you're too busy getting pissed off about a band not releasing Master Of Puppets 2. Bottom line is you should give this a fair try before dismissing it, as I feel like all the naysayers are responsible for me holding out on The Black Album for so long. Not only is it a solid collection of great tracks but the tracklist has been arranged in the optimal way, making each track flow well into the next...again, another point that's never mentioned in the "LARS SUCKS!!!!!" forum threads.

1. Enter Sandman
2. Sad But True
3. Holier Than Thou
4. The Unforgiven
5. Wherever I May Roam
6. Don't Tread On Me
7. Through The Never
8. Nothing Else Matters
9. Of Wolf And Man
10. The God That Failed
11. My Friend Of Misery
12. The Struggle Within
ALBUM RATING - 7/10

I may get a second post up this week but if not, I'll get one up next week. Also, check out the Showdown post before this as I've been updating that with even more tracks recently.