Here Is The News: November 2018 Edition

Here's some news for you; I just counted the number of blog posts I'll have to write in December to make it to 52 for the entire year and I'm gonna have to frickin' go some to reach that!
Until then, here's one less blog post to worry about!

BRUCE DICKINSON: WHY I OPENED THE ARK OF THE COVENANT

Iron Maiden singer Bruce Dickinson has revealed his reasons for opening the Ark of the Covenant on stage at the band's latest concert in Germany. The band were halfway through a performance of "Revelations" when Bruce wheeled on the actual Ark of the Covenant and proceeded to open the lid, prompting the holy souls trapped inside to fill the auditorium and recreate the iconic climactic scene from Raiders Of The Lost Ark, only with concert goers replacing the roles of the Nazis. The outspoken vocalist defended his actions in a recent radio interview in between dates during the band's 2018/19 world tour.

When asked why he opened the Ark, Bruce (pictured left) responded "A lot of people have been spouting nonsense about what the holy Ark of the Covenant is capable of but nobody's actually had the sense to see for themselves. It's all well and good going "Yeah, don't open it" because of that scene in Raiders where all the faces melted but nobody talks about how easy it was to avoid the searing death that the Nazis suffered". Bruce was referring to how Indiana Jones and Marion avoided the same fate as the stormtroopers by averting their eyes when the spirits exited their supernatural prison, something Bruce was quick to do after removing the lid. "Iron Maiden are an experienced band and I know how to sing with my eyes closed. I mean, I was OK so I'm sure our fans were OK if they knew how to close their eyes"!

Bruce Dickinson (estimated net worth $125 million) has shocked fans in the past with his staunch defence of the UK Conservative party and his support of Brexit. His strong opinions have often landed him in hot water and this instance is no exception, as the families of the deceased concert goers have demanded some form of retribution for Bruce's actions. They feel that his actions were largely self-centred and done without the consideration of the hard-working fans who perhaps didn't have the social or economical means to watch the classic Indiana Jones film.

According to the band's management, the idea to bring the Ark of the Covenant on stage and actually open it during the guitar solo of "Revelations" was entirely Bruce's. When asked for further comment on whether the band supported Bruce's decision, guitarist Janick Gers (who was standing closest to the Ark when it was opened) stated "Garfarbfarabrabff", which we believe meant "It's a bit late now but we stand by Bruce and whatever he does on stage, no matter how poorly thought through it might seem".

Bruce has been advised not to wheel out the Ark of the Covenant again but he claimed that he still plans to use it during performances. "At the end of the day, regardless of how bad things might seem now, things will get better. Plastic surgery has come a long way in just the last five years and fans who literally got their faces melted off can have them reconstructed before coming back next year to have them melted off again, albeit figuratively instead!". When questioned about the fans who aren't as wealthy as him and can't afford the tens of thousands of pounds for crucial facial reconstruction surgery, Bruce replied that there are plenty of fine masks available.

AC/DC PLACED ON LIFE-SUPPORT

Australian Rock band AC/DC have been moved to a private wing in the Royal Melbourne Hospital and placed on life-support after losing another band member. The legendary Hard Rock group were in critical condition when they were brought to the hospital with some doctors claiming to be amazed that they've "lasted this long".

The band first showed signs of deteriorating health when they had to go in for treatment in 2014 to replace rhythm guitarist Malcolm Young. After a successful transplant, AC/DC were back in the studio ready to record a new album but after the disappointment that was Rock Or Bust, the band's physical well-being kept declining over the years. The band had to undergo emergency surgery to remove the drummer due to criminal charges pressed against him and less than two years later, AC/DC underwent a frontmanectomy to allow vocalist Brian Johnson a chance to recover from a hearing condition.

Whilst the band were quick to replace Brian Johnson with Axl Rose (pictured above), fans begun to question whether it was fair to allow the band to continue in such a poor state. One lifelong supporter of the band commented "It feels like they're only carrying on for the sake of it, not because they're getting any joy out of what they're doing and certainly not because people are desperate for them to keep going. It's like The Simpsons all over again".

After suffering critical bass player failure, resulting in the loss of Cliff Williams from the band's lineup, AC/DC were once again rushed to hospital to ensure they had enough functioning band members to make it through the tour. Things seemed to be going well until Axl Rose recently fell ill on stage at a Guns N' Roses concert, prompting AC/DC's management to ensure they were plugged into life-support.

It's impossible to say how long the band have left but if there's one thing you can admire them for, it's their determination to keep on fighting. Even when the quality of their music is dwindling and they're resorting to desperate choices for vocalist replacements, AC/DC are hanging on in there until they can rock no more...presumably a couple of days after Angus Young inevitably drops out.

HOT NEW BAND TAKES INTERNET BY STORM

A new, up-and-coming Rock band are rapidly gaining fans after sounding remarkably similar to iconic 70s group Styx. This new band, named River, have released two singles in just two weeks that contain incredibly similar structures, vocals and guitar playing to the songs "Come Sail Away" and "Renegade", two of the band's most popular singles.

River is made up of six band members: Johnny Spaw on vocals, Jim Elder on guitar, Charlie Ozzonap on bass, Rod Schuleman on drums, Larry Cummin keys and Mickey Phelps also on bass. Despite all appearing to be quite old in the music videos for their singles "Boat On The Highway" and "Mr. Mechano", each band member sports a long black moustache and thick black glasses from start to finish.

Fans of 70s music have taken to the YouTube comment sections and social media to remark in absolute amazement that River sound almost identical to Styx, posting such comments as "OMG these guys are the new Styx!!" and "I'd love to hear these guys cover Styx, they sound just like them!!" over and over and over again as if they're the only people on the face of the planet who have made the connection between two bands who sound similar. Even fans of more contemporary music who have only heard Styx through the occasional music snippet in TV shows have noted similarities, although almost 100% of them don't care.

When asked for comment on River's entrance onto the Rock scene, none of the members of Styx have been available. In fact, none of the members of Styx have even been seen in the last fortnight. Whilst there are theories all over the Internet describing where Styx could have gone, the theory with the most credibility seems to be the one stating that they're simply getting rehearsing and getting ready for their tour with Larry The Cable Guy. This is a thing that's happening. Styx are going on tour with Larry The Cable Guy. I'm actually not making this bit up.

River aren't the only band with remarkable similarities to a 70s Rock group getting next to no attention anymore who have surfaced recently. A few months ago, The Tumbling Rocks released their first album to an audience of indifferent hipsters and earlier this year, Purple Lloyd teased a new album and tour starting mid-December. The sudden resurgence of Classic Rock has proven that it doesn't matter if you create new, exciting material and develop your own style of music for a modern audience still hungry for Rock; as long as you can sound exactly like a band that isn't doing anything worthwhile anymore, you can bring some happiness to overweight fans who desperately want it to be 1973 again.

I'm not sure if I'll get all the blog posts done in time for January but I'll definitely get at least four up!

Spyro Reignited Trilogy

Hurrah, it's finally here! The Spyro the Dragon remake/remaster + that did a much better job of recapturing the pure joy of the original trilogy whilst improving on it for a 21st century audience than the N. Sane Trilogy did for Crash Bandicoot. I could talk about small but significant gameplay tweaks and how the handling feels spot on (for the most part) but that's not why you're here. You're here to hear my verdict on the game's soundtrack!

Originally composed by Stewart Copeland, the music for the first three Spyro The Dragon games was magical and, at times, a little abstract. Rather than focusing on catchy melodies and hooks in the same way that platforming video games of the time were adept at, Copeland instead built the music around a few distinct tunes reworked across several different areas and focused on a more ambient feel to suit the level's environment...although that's not to say he didn't also compose some bloody catchy melodies now and then.
Unlike my three-part look at the music from the N. Sane Trilogy, I intend to write a much longer blog post looking at the overall highs and lows of all three games. In other words, a review. I'm reviewing all three rerecorded soundtracks in one post whilst also making comparisons to the original where appropriate. My main reasoning for this is that unlike the N. Sane Trilogy where the game's soundtrack needed a more in-depth look to accommodate for the various changes made to certain tunes, Toys For Bob (the trilogy's developer) have tried to remain faithful to the original sound, even going as far as to re-enlist Stewart Copeland to help with the arrangements.
So with that in mind, let's take off!

Before this game came out, I went back to the original soundtracks for all three Spyro games and had a good listen to some of my favourite tracks to remind me about what I loved so much about Copeland's score. What impressed me most was how Copeland gave each game a distinct sound whilst still retaining the feel of a game series about a spunky purple dragon travelling across magical realms on heroic adventures, starting with 1998's Spyro The Dragon. The music sounded magical yet was recorded with primarily Rock instruments; heavy bass, various guitars, pounding percussion, organs galore. Sure, there were touches of brass and strings here & there, but the highlights were often tracks with a wide-eyed sense of wonder about them (Dark Passage, Magic Crafters Home) or a bit of a punch to them (Terrace Village, Haunted Towers).
One year later and Spyro 2: Ripto's Rage (or Gateway To Glimmer depending on your region) was released. More Spyro action with even more ambitious music, containing all the same tropes from the original game whilst taking on various styles from all over the world. Starting with Glimmer, you can tell that Stewart Copeland still had plenty of creative steam left but right after that, you get levels like Colossus and Hurricos; the former utilising some neat Gregorian chanting on top of the guitar melodies whilst the latter perfectly balances heavier, mechanical sound effects on top of a simplistic background score. Each piece of music perfectly suits the level, whether it's the Arabian flair in Scorch or the bustling, futuristic sound of Metropolis.
Finally, we have Spyro: Year Of The Dragon (my personal favourite game AND soundtrack). I don't know if it was the need to make Spyro seem edgier to the 00s generation of gamers but the music definitely took on more of an Industrial tone in this game. Some of the first levels you play contain music fit for Matrix-inspired parkour videos like Cloud Spires and Molten Crater, not to mention the sharply more aggressive boss battle themes. Even the more familiar tunes like Sunny Villa and Frozen Altars have an unmistakable edge to them but as mentioned earlier, the soundtrack is still that of a Spyro game. The organs and heavy bass are still there, although they had to share the spotlight with computer-generated sound effects.

I may not have adored the music from the original Spyro trilogy but I definitely enjoyed the majority of tracks from each level (although I strongly dislike Sgt. Byrd's theme) and there were certainly some pieces of music that I would listen to on repeat where possible (Harbour Speedway, Scorch and of course, the incredible Credits theme to name a few). Listening to those pieces of music in the Reignited Trilogy was a mostly enjoyable experience although there were a couple of times where I had to flip the sound settings to "Original" instead of "Reignited" simply because I felt like Toys For Bob had completely fucked up the rerecordings. This is where my doubt about whether I liked the new music came in.
Fans of the original source material are always going to have the nostalgia factor weighing down their judgement so even though I prefer 100% of the original versions of songs I loved from the Spyro trilogy, most of the music that I was happily comfortable with but never religiously fanatic about sounds just as good (if not a bit better) in the Reignited Trilogy. Instrumentation is largely identical to the point that I was genuinely unsure if I'd left the settings on "Original" or "Reignited" a lot of the time and listening to each track in HD on YouTube whilst writing this review really does the enhanced soundtrack a lot of favours, although they still made the same mistake Vicarious Visions made with the N. Sane Trilogy in not whacking the bass up to 11 or beyond.
Every other observation about the game's soundtrack could be considered a positive or negative depending on your personal music tastes, e.g. the fact that Toys For Bob developed the trilogy as one game so the graphics, gameplay engine and soundtrack all feel the same across all three remade titles. The subtle changes in the original trilogy's soundtrack seem obvious in comparison to the differences between the rerecordings but again, this is probably only going to affect the purists who avidly listened to the original music and would gladly fork over half their paycheck to have the original collection on vinyl if that were possible.

Overall, the Reignited Trilogy's soundtrack reflects the game; newcomers will love it for its incredible charm and creativity whilst those who grew up with the originals and played them all to 337% completion repeatedly will always choose the classics over the remakes, even though they'll still enjoy the remasters a hell of a lot. If I had to rate the entire trilogy's soundtrack, I'd probably give it a 8/10 for doing the originals justice although still making a few fumbles along the way...like the Fracture Hills rerecording. I mean, it's just...the fuck were they thinking?!

Simulation Theory - Muse

Well this is a first. I'm reviewing a straight-up Pop album!

If there's one thing Muse can do with their music, it's conjure feelings of nostalgia and thoughts about how good music used to be; thoughts like "Remember when Muse used to be a Rock band?" and "Remember when Matt Bellamy's ego was in check?". Simulation Theory is the tragic return to everything that sucks about Muse after the promising dead cat bounce that was Drones. Instead of great riffs on guitar/bass, we get synth-driven toss. Instead of dynamic anthems perfect for arena gigs and radio play for an audience of hungry young Rock fans, we get electronic drumbeats and noise made on some coffee-stained hipster shit's laptop.
Looking at the positives first, album opener "Algorithm" has some decent instrumentation and kicks things off in typical grand fashion for Muse. The electronic sound of the drums, bass and string accompaniments set the tone for the rest of the album too so if you like the song, you'll probably get some joy out of the record. However, for fans who can still remember when Muse wrote songs like "Hysteria", "Supermassive Black Hole" and "Knights Of Cydonia" that actually rocked, this harbinger of the band's switch back to electronic garbage teased in The Resistance and actualised in The 2nd Law won't fill you with any hope.
That's probably the biggest flaw with the album. You can argue that Muse not writing Rock songs is good or bad and that their reliance on 80s nostalgia (right down to the album cover that's more on-the-nose than an army of blackheads) helps or hinders the record but even if you choose the pessimistic route with both of those opinions, you must accept both of these things can work if the music is good and serves a decent purpose. The music and lyrics about hope and fighting back against arseholes in power are supposed to be inspiring for the millions unhappy with the current system but here's the kicker; they fuckin' ain't. A stadium Rock band releasing mainstream Pop is as inspirational as a series of flatlines in a coma ward.

The majority of tracks either resemble a dystopian Sci-Fi's cynical pastiche of what "future music" should sound like or the incidental score of a film/TV show desperate to remind people that 1980s synth music existed. However, there are some positive aspects. "Pressure" is the token fun song with catchy guitar riffs and vocal melodies, much like "Panic Station" on The 2nd Law (which was also the third track on that album too; totally not coordinated at all) and even some of the mediocre or annoying tracks contain elements that could've worked if used properly, like the gritty slide guitar riffs in the laughable Herbie Hancock nightmare "Propaganda".
Muse have acknowledged that this album was heavily inspired by music from the 80s so the Depeche Mode drumbeats ("Blockades") and John Carpenter synth ("The Void") are present without any attempt to mask them. It's admirable that Muse at least attempted to make the material sound unique to them instead of just flat-out copying another band's style but they would've been better off continuing in the direction they were headed with Drones or, at the very least, blending the 80s Pop aspects with heavier Rock ones. Instead, they end up sounding like Coldplay ("Thought Contagion") and Indie Pop bands found exclusively on the iPhone of an Instagram celebrity ("Something Human").
I rate the album 2/10. It doesn't inspire you to rise up against fascism (and if it does, where the fuck have you been for the last two years?!), it contains a collection of music that fails to stick with you unless you love electronic Pop, it sounds like Matt Bellamy regurgitating the same old lyrical shit he's been peddling for over a decade and it does 80s Pop music a disservice by dissecting it for the sole purpose of stapling the still-twitching parts to modern wank like a Frankenstein's monster you actually want to be burnt alive. Regardless of which way you shake it, Simulation Theory is a complete failure.

Post-Apocalypto - Tenacious D

What's this? I'm posting a blog post at the START of the month instead of three days before the end of it when I'm knackered and almost passing out, frantically trying to think of one more thing to include in a Here Is The News post before I go to bed? That's right, because people who leave things to the last minute always suffer as a result and speaking of leaving things too late...

From this album's announcement to its eventual release, I've been worried about Post-Apocalypto. The album cover is fucking awful, the track-listing looked like a worse version of the debut containing more minute-long snippets than actual fleshed out songs like Rize Of The Fenix and let's face it, concept albums are rarely ever a good thing. With each week, we were "treated" to an episode of Tenacious D's hit & miss web series containing skits and music included on the album but none of it filled me with anticipation. Today, the album was finally released and my God, it is absolutely terrible. It is a piece of shit and if you've never heard any Tenacious D before, you owe it to yourself to avoid this album like the fucking plague.
For starters, the album opener and (I guess) title track "POST-APOCALYPTO THEME" is a 37 second repurposed riff that was originally written for "Rize Of The Fenix" only to be scrapped in favour of a much better verse/chorus structure. That's how they're opening their fourth album; scraps off the cutting room floor that they couldn't even be bothered to turn into a full song. From here, it only gets worse. The concept album dealing with a nuclear holocaust caused by Trump is 50% dialogue excerpts and 50% songs both from the YouTube series, each track having an average length of about 90 seconds. The entire length of the album is just over half an hour, about two minutes longer than Reign In Blood - Slayer.
Tenacious D's last album came out in 2012, six years ago. This album took them six years to make, just let that sink in for a bit. Six years for a rehashed title track and half an hour of mildly amusing comedy taken from about 76 minutes of much funnier material in the YouTube series. You can't even claim that they needed extra time to animate the YouTube shorts because they're largely based around still images knocked up in Microsoft Paint. It's the equivalent of having the entire summer holiday to complete a school project only to realise that you've left it until the day before term time begins to do anything, forcing you to ask your parents to do it all with you...or in this case, Dave Grohl.

Despite each song being written by Jack Black and Kyle Gass, many tunes sound like terrible Foo Fighters filler tracks with their slower tempos and dull, uninspired riffs ("TAKE US INTO SPACE", "WOMAN TIME") and the ones that do sound more like Tenacious D songs are generally piss poor. The lyrical themes are trite without the humour to carry it off ("COLORS", "ROBOT") and the few tracks that contain promising riffs or have a couple of funny lyrics are either too short or not strong enough to redeem the rest of the album ("DADDY DING DONG", "MAKING LOVE"). However, even the better songs have fatal flaws in the grand scheme of things.
Concept albums with a narrative, like this one, should have exactly that; a narrative. If you haven't watched the YouTube series from start to finish, I think you'd genuinely struggle to understand a lot of what was happening. The overall plot is there but there are large gaps that have to be filled in by a knowledge of the YouTube series. When I discussed the previous three Tenacious D albums on the blog last year, I claimed that the music on The Pick Of Destiny doesn't carry enough of the film's story for you to understand everything that's happening but the main difference between The Pick Of Destiny and Post-Apocalypto is that The Pick Of Destiny is more of a soundtrack to the film; there aren't tracks on that album dedicated to the narrative, it's all just music. Here, the album is expected to tell a story but utterly fails.
Instead, we get a few previews of dialogue taken directly from the YouTube series that often aren't as funny due to jokes being edited down and context being completely absent, featuring multiple different characters all seemingly voiced by Jack Black. It might have been better if they could've got some other voice actors involved (Hell, even Kage would've done) but at least the scientist and Terminator voices were fun. I also approve of the band firmly stating their political policy, although all being anti-Trump does is confirm that you're not a complete cunt. Pointing out that the guy's going to get a lot of people killed with his stupidity isn't anything new or original, it's like dedicating an entire album to the idea that we're made up of bones.

If I had to describe Post-Apocalypto in a word, it'd be Lazy. They phoned in the music, they phoned in the story (notice how the ending to both the YouTube series and the album are fuckawful), they phoned in the artwork and they made us wait half a fucking decade for it. It's a bad album and a weak concept album that could've been improved if it contained a story about Tenacious D journeying across a post-apocalyptic wasteland with songs about everything that could potentially cause an extinction level event; a song about aliens, a song about global warming, a song about nukes, a song about war, a song about volcanic eruptions, a song about overpopulation tied into having lots of unprotected sex, I mean JESUS this shit should write itself!
I rate the album 3/10 and that's me being generous. The band still play properly and I didn't hate every second of it. The fact that a couple of lines made me smile now and then have earned it an extra point but honestly, this could still be one of the worst albums I've ever listened to. It may only be 30 minutes long but those 30 minutes could be spend watching an episode of a sitcom or reading a comic book or having a difficult fucking wank, anything other than listening to Post-Apocalypto. I also wouldn't recommend seeing Tenacious D live if it's going to be an acoustic gig, as you know they'll be playing the shite off this album on their next tour.
It might be entertaining with the whole band if they try to tell a story on stage (and the band definitely put on a hell of a performance when it's more than just Jables and Kage) but seriously, it pains me to say that The D screwed up. Oh well, we can always enjoy their fifth album in 2023 that will probably be a return to form in an attempt to win back favour with everyone who wanted this Comedy Rock band to release Comedy Rock.

Here Is The News: October 2018 Edition

Some more news for ya, fresh out of the journalistic oven that is my brain!

FLEETWOOD MAC BREWERY PARTY ENDS IN DISASTER

A party organised at a brewery in Germany by 70s Classic Rock band Fleetwood Mac ended on a sour note after the building nearly burnt down with all inebriated attendees trapped inside. Fleetwood Mac organised the party as a celebration of both their new tour and the settling of petty issues that arose during the new tour. The brewery party was supposed to be light-hearted and fun with plenty of drinks to go around but arguments between band members created a chain reaction of events that nearly burnt everyone alive.

The evening started off with everyone in high spirits, sharing drinks and happy memories of previous Fleetwood Mac concerts. Members of the band joined in on the fun but after a few drinks, Lindsay Buckingham caused a stir by insisting that he could balance an egg on his forehead without it dropping off. According to eye witnesses, John McVie warned him against it and some members of the band's management tried to talk him out of it but Lindsay was quick to angrily shoot them down, adamant that he could demonstrate his incredible balancing skills with a raw egg he happened to have with him in his jacket pocket.

After approximately two seconds of balancing the egg, Lindsay dropped it on the ground next to him. The splattered egg would've been bad enough but matters soon became worse when a member of staff at the brewery slipped up on the splattered yolk, sending him skidding into a gigantic barrel of beer propped up by the north wall. After colliding with the barrel at high speed, the barrel dislodged and dropped down onto the floor, creating several cracks in the body as it rolled through the brewery, panicking everybody who wasn't inebriated enough to notice what was happening.

If things weren't already going poorly, the barrel very nearly crushed Stevie Nicks (pictured right with the band) although thankfully, one of her managers pushed her out of the way before it could do any serious harm. Unfortunately, before this could happen, the sight of a colossal cask heading towards her made her drop the El 'Bacco Grande cigar she was smoking in shock and the trail of beer leaking out of the cracks in the barrel soon came in contact with the lit end of her Cuban stogy. The ignition spread rapidly along the trail of alcohol and into the barrel of high percentage beer, causing it to explode before it came in contact with the wall of the brewery.

Fortunately, nobody at the party was killed although many attendees suffered serious burns, stress-induced trauma and splitting hangovers the next day. Members of Fleetwood Mac have since apologised for the incidents that took place, although Lindsay Buckingham refuses to back down after defending his actions that night. When asked for comment on his behaviour and part in the downfall of the casual piss-up, he replied "I don't care what anyone from that band of wankers says, I KNOW I've lasted longer than twelve seconds before dropping the egg!".

DAVID BOWIE WON'T STOP RELEASING ALBUMS

Despite being dead for over two years now, David Bowie is still releasing a series of albums seemingly from beyond the grave. This mystery has boggled experts in the fields of science and the supernatural as both have verified that David Bowie is very much dead and yet continues to release live albums, compilations and box sets. This was first discovered in 2016 when a compilation of early Bowie material appeared next to a statue of him in Aylesbury, although it wasn't until these compilations and live albums kept appearing that people believed something strange was going on.

The statue (pictured left) has become a sight where people gather to witness miracles instead of just another receptacle for graffiti and tramp piss. Fans have travelled from across the globe to await the new music from deceased cultural icon, although the music only appears when people aren't looking. According to a record producer at Columbia, the new albums are "clearly a sign that (David) wants us to not only keep listening to his music for many years to come but to also keep buying his music too. The man must be working extraordinarily hard to produce such fine work from a different mortal plain and frankly, the least we could do is shell out for the deluxe edition of his new Lazarus re-reissue that may or may not appear at the statue next month".

The new albums are expected to keep mysteriously arriving well into 2020, according to Sony Music executive and part-time travelling psychic "Mystic" Murv Washington: "Whilst I cannot communicate directly with Mr. Bowie, I can sense his aura is telling us to keep copying and releasing everything he ever recorded for another two years or so. David was very much a fan of selling himself out to the record industry too so it feels good to know that when we distribute EPs of lesser material he never intended for any of you to hear, we're doing what he would've wanted...at least that's what I tell myself before bed every night to make it easier to sleep".

Bowie's new music has inspired millions of people all over the world already but his deceased actions continue to inspire one famous musician. Queens Of The Stone Age frontman Josh Homme (pronounced Hommey, apparently) has currently put himself into a medically induced coma in an attempt to release music from a state of near physical and mental death, once again proving to the world that he's a serious artist who is also so ahead of his time. Friends of Josh tried to talk him out of it but according to Dave Grohl, he was certain that he had to do it if he ever wanted to "escape this pitiful genre that is Rock into something only the sophisticated can truly relish". Unfortunately for the newly brain-dead musician, none of his efforts have been fruitful as the only releases the vegetated rocker has produced are runny bowel movements and a reissue of Era Vulgaris which was promptly flushed away with the rest of his shit.

Whilst the Them Crooked Vultures vocalist may not return from the self-inflicted state between life and death, one thing's for certain: David Bowie is gone...although his music remains. Naturally, some fans have voiced scepticism over the nature of the new album releases or whether he actually passed away at all (he did, there's no doubt about it) but at the end of the day, Bowie's music will always be remembered so long as it was recorded between 1969 and 1977.

PORTAL OF CORRUPTION GETS BIGGER EVERY DAY

A gigantic, pulsating wormhole that appeared during a Wolfmother concert in California and corrupts the minds of anyone who comes within several feet of it continues to expand and devour parts of the stage it appeared on. The tear in the fabric of reality, dubbed the Portal Of Corruption by a local newspaper after an online competition to name it resulted in "Porty McPortface" coming first, appears to have an effect on all lifeforms as those who too close soon commit unspeakable acts of horror that go against everything they previously stood for.

Wolfmother are currently touring America with new and old material and a setlist that features such hits as "Victorious", "Woman", "New Day Rising" and "Joker And The Thief". However, during their (currently) last show, the band were halfway through "Dimension" when the Portal Of Corruption opened up on stage, engulfing the bassist and a couple of amps. According to multiple sources, it took fans almost three entire minutes to realise that it wasn't actually part of the show.

When asked for comment on the appearance of the rift that may or may not lead to what we as a species perceive as Hell, frontman Andrew Stockdale (who was the closest to the portal when it opened on stage) was unavailable for comment as he was too busy viciously assaulting and forcibly fornicating with fans unfortunate enough to be in the front row. Wolfmother's manager has issued a statement on the band's website claiming "This behaviour is unacceptable, whether your mind has been contaminated by a Lovecraftian void or not, and Andrew is very sorry for disappointing his fans".

The Portal Of Corruption hasn't only tainted Andrew Stockdale (pictured right) and the rest of the band, who have sadly been shot dead after they attempted to skin and eat various roadies. Multiple fans who were too close to the portal and scientists wishing to examine the gateway have also fallen under its spell, becoming driven to enact atrocities that would make even the most desensitised soul shiver. One fan stated that they would "probably go see Wolfmother play live again" before they too were promptly put down by government agents fearing for the safety of the general populace.

Some fans and musicians have even started travelling to the portal, praying to it in the belief that offering undying allegiance will spare their lives when this inevitably kickstarts the apocalypse. One such musician was guitarist Ted Nugent. He approached the gateway in an attempt to bargain with it but to no avail, although since then he has gone on to start four different charities for impoverished children and donate all of his wealth to the needy. It's unclear why the portal keeps slowly increasing in size but when asked about how the country intends to deal with this ever-growing mass of corruption and pure evil that will soon become the entire planet's concern, most Americans responded with "it'll probably just go away if we don't talk about it".

Happy Halloween, folks!

Rapid Fire: King Crimson, Rob Zombie, Horisont

I know I said I was gonna do Living The Dream - Uriah Heep in a Rapid Fire post but that can wait; we've got three albums with spooky looking album covers to discuss, starting with this Proggy waste of time!

1. In The Court Of The Crimson King - King Crimson

I've always found this album cover to be kinda off-putting so it definitely belongs in this Rapid Fire post, especially if you imagine the contorted face of horror is reacting to a spooky ghost or something. I'll tell you something else as well; this album is NOT an easy find online. However, after searching for each song, I listened to the entire thing and can confirm that I absolutely wasted my time. This album is shit. It's worse than shit; it's long, drawn-out, pretentious, tedious, over-inflated, noisy shit. However, if there's one type of shit it isn't, it's pointless shit.
Whilst I despise every song on this godawful record, from wacky album opener "21st Century Schizoid Man" to horrific masturbation "The Court Of The Crimson King", it's a necessary evil in the world of music because this turd masquerading as "art" inspired a myriad of much greater albums and bands. Hell, it arguably created the Prog Rock genre; we have Yes, Genesis, The Moody Blues, Jethro Tull, Dream Theater, Rush, all manner of great bands who had the sense to realise you could make something long-winded and grand without sounding like something made when university students program laptop AI to make a 50 minute album.
This isn't one of those albums that you must listen to before you die; you get nothing out of it, presumably the reason why so many critics who should know better claim it's such a great album. If you don't feel anything, you're probably not getting it which means you're a stoopidhead so you better praise it to give yourself credibility. I wouldn't recommend In The Court Of The Emperor's New Clothes to anyone as it's nothing more than a misfire that happened to give us a great musical genre. If you do like this album, good for you. I don't think worse of you for liking this but nobody should think better of you either.

1. 21st Century Schizoid Man

2. I Talk To The Wind

3. Epitaph

4. Moonchild

5. The Court Of The Crimson King

ALBUM RATING - 1/10

2. Hellbilly Deluxe - Rob Zombie

This is probably more appropriate for a Halloween themed blog post, due to the deliberately scary album cover and music based off classic Horror films. This was Rob Zombie's first solo album after White Zombie and whilst the music still contains his typical sound of growling vocals, heavy riffs and thunderous percussion, Hellbilly Deluxe is definitely more of an Industrial record than Astro-Creep: 2000 or La Sexorcisto with more emphasis on synth-effects and repetitive structures than guitar solos and other traditional Rock aspects.

The album starts off with its three singles: "Superbeast", "Dragula" and "Living Dead Girl", immediately setting the tone and putting its best foot forwards with three completely different yet consistently heavy tracks. Once these have finished, the album continues to knock down doors with its fine-tuned, well-crafted Dance Metal but by the second half of the record, you'll notice some of the tracks start to drag a little (despite being under five minutes long). It's always the risk when writing an album containing variations on the same song over and over again but at least the song this album is based off is a good one.
Hellbilly Deluxe has some great songs all contained within the first half but the entire album is perfect for background noise, particularly at Halloween parties or similar environments. This is essentially Rob Zombie's shtick; heavy Industrial Metal without complexity featuring old Horror film audio snippets and growling vocals, each track carrying a name that sounds like a Goosebumps title or alcoholic beverage served exclusively at a bar where you have to cover your lid if you want to make it home that night. If you like that kind of music, you definitely won't hate this album although I think anyone would be hard-pressed to love it unless this music truly is their jam.

1. Call Of The Zombie

2. Superbeast

3. Dragula

4. Living Dead Girl

5. Perversion 99

6. Demonoid Phenomenon

7. Spookshow Baby

8. How To Make A Monster

9. Meet The Creeper

10. The Ballad Of Resurrection Joe And Rosa Whore

11. What Lurks On Channel X?

12. Return Of The Phantom Stranger

13. The Beginning Of The End

ALBUM RATING - 6/10

3. About Time - Horisont

You might see this album cover and think this is a NWOTHM album containing music similar to Iron Maiden and Anthrax but you'd be dead wrong! Despite having a somewhat creepy looking cover, it's actually a modern album by a Swedish group inspired by 70s bands such as Thin Lizzy, UFO, Rory Gallagher and Blue Oyster Cult. The album's relatively easy going despite containing such a striking cover but even though they arguably stumbled at the very first hurdle, the rest of the record is a fantastic listen.

Album opener "The Hive" starts off a bit slow and gentle for a Rock album but when it gets going, my God does it get going. Great riffs, awesome vocals and perfect use of electric piano accompaniment to give us a top quality tune (even if it does rip-off "MacArthur Park" at one point in the solo). From there, the album pumps out great music that resembles an army of Frankenstein's monsters from 70s Rock bands, ready to get your foot stomping and head nodding. We get softer songs with an acoustic flair that break into something faster paced ("Letare"), fun tracks that blend the grand riffing of Queen with the galloping rhythm of Eddie Money ("Boston Gold") and a longer, more progressive title track that brings the album to a quiet close.
Recently, I criticised the Greta Van Fleet debut for sounding like a poor attempt at copying the Led Zeppelin sound. The difference between an album like Anthem Of The Peaceful Army and About Time can be summarised by this quote from Wilson Mizner: "If you steal from one author, it's plagiarism. If you steal from many, it's research". Greta Van Fleet's music was entirely driven by skin-deep comparisons to one band whereas Horisont have taken the best aspects of a whole variety of artists to craft something that sounds distinctly theirs. I definitely recommend this album to fans of Classic Rock, although don't expect anything as heavy as Deep Purple, Led Zeppelin or the like. It still rocks but not enough to bring the house down; just a couple of loose pictures here & there.

1. The Hive

2. Electrical

3. Without Warning

4. Letare

5. Night Line

6. Point Of Return

7. Boston Gold

8. Hungry Love

9. Dark Sides

10. About Time

ALBUM RATING - 8/10

COMING SOON: Posts about the music from Spyro The Dragon...and maybe The Police.

Anthem Of The Peaceful Army - Greta Van Fleet

Hey, you know that band that sound exactly like Led Zeppelin! They wrote an album...no, not Black Smoke Rising...no, not From The Fires either. Those weren't albums. This is their first album.

When I first listened to From The Fires, I did the obvious thing of comparing them to Led Zeppelin due to the vocals and guitarwork of the Brothers Kiszka. I was excited to hear them follow the original band's progression, developing their Classic Rock grooves into mystical Folk epics and thunderous Hard Rock bangers whilst retaining what made them pure. I also claimed that their debut EP didn't sound like "a hacky tribute album" and that they added their own flair to each track. I'm reminding you of this because anyone who's listened to this album will now start to understand just how disappointed I was after listening to Anthem Of The Peaceful Army.
From start to finish, the album felt like Greta Van Fleet were writing more of a Led Zeppelin parody akin to Beatallica than a Classic Rock revival like Robert Pehrsson's Humbucker or a Rock album clearly inspired by Led Zeppelin's distinct sound like Rush's 1974 debut. It's as if the band got together, played disc one of Mothership and said "Right, I think we've got the gist of this" before writing a load of generic Bluesy lyrics and Jimmy Page riffs over the course of a single afternoon. It's not a bad album (definitely not 1.6/10) but it reeks of cynicism from either the band or an overbearing record label trying to cash in on romanticised nostalgia.
Album opener "Age Of Man" should not have kicked the record off. If anything, it should've been the closer with its slower tempo, heavier riff, longer length and dynamic build-up throughout. A Rock band's debut should proudly announce "We're here and we rock!" and whilst the band partially did that with lead single "When The Curtain Falls", a riff driven belter clearly written for radio play and general public consumption, they needed something shorter and punchier for their introduction. Luckily, we got those tracks later on in the form of "The Cold Wind" and "Lover, Leaver" but there's something missing from them.

A great song isn't just an awesome riff or memorable lyrics; it's a perfect blend of multiple contributing factors, hence why bands like Led Zeppelin and Queen are iconic. Sure, they had incredibly gifted vocalists and knew how to lay down epic riffs but the drummers and bassists played an integral part on and off the stage too. Greta Van Fleet have put all their eggs in the superficial basket of sounding like Led Zeppelin after a casual listen but when you actually focus on each aspect of the songs on the album, it feels like they were inspired by specific songs rather than the band's music as a whole.
Take Joshua Kiszka's vocals; yes, he can wail like Robert Plant and this comes in very handy now and then...but that's not all that Robert Plant did. Plant knew when to show restraint, when to actually sing. Kiszka seems limited to just shouting, even when it's completely inappropriate. "The New Day" is a great track musically but it's ruined by the shrill, abrasive vocals. Similarly, Bluesy number "Brave New World" contains some decent riffs and percussion all crafted into a cracking Hard Rock song, only for it to be spoilt by unnecessarily loud shouting in the chorus. Even the verses sound needlessly aggressive for the music, something that only becomes more obvious the more you listen to each track.
It's a shame that one of the best attributes of the band's previous work is easily the weakest here although thankfully the guitarwork is still decent. A little uninspired here and there ("Watching Over") but great when it counts and serviceable throughout. Bass and drums do their job of making the band sound like a Led Zeppelin clone, only without the creativity and spark that Jones and Bonham effortlessly channelled into their music. However, there's only so much I can criticise the band's involvement in making the album before I start to question whether this disappointment truly lies at their feet or the record label's.

Anthem Of The Peaceful Army feels like the product of executive interference more than the band running out of creative steam after only a couple of years (like Royal Blood). There's no way a Rock band gets this level of promotion and attention in the media for a debut album without record labels pulling strings and even then, they'll only do that if they think there's something to gain from it. Right now, nostalgia is in so clueless, corporate executives are obviously going to try and cash in on that before the tide turns. I wouldn't be surprised if Greta's next release sounds wildly different in response to negative reactions to the album sounding like a poor attempt at recreating Led Zeppelin II because record executives only operate on extreme ends of the spectrum.
I rate the album 5/10 for being adequate but ultimately a missed opportunity for a truly great album. When writing reviews, I try to avoid directly comparing new bands/albums with a specific band/album from the past but in this case, I think it's fair to go into similarities and differences between Greta and Led Zeppelin seeing as how their striking musical (and attempts at visual) likeness to the 70s Rock pioneers is their central gimmick and it IS a gimmick. You can compare modern bands like Wolfmother and Muse to older Classic Rock acts but at least they developed their own sound and musical style, forging their own way into the Hall Of Rock
Normally I would give bands four or five albums to establish their sound, release their "best" album and find new ways to innovate their material as they start to head into a new decade. For Greta Van Fleet, I'm actually hoping they mix things up straight away. Whilst I'd still love to hear their take on some of Led Zeppelin's more ambitious music (as the band do have a natural talent for sounding like Led Zepp that would be absolutely wasted if not utilised in one way or another), I think Album 2 needs a couple of tracks that deviate from the generic; maybe some Hard Prog or synth-based Arena Rock making up 20% and the remaining 80% being more of the same, albeit with toned down vocals and better lyrics.
All in all though, the good thing about music is you can still enjoy it with repeat listens so if you really just want good old fashioned Classic Rock with great riffs and amazing vocals, all of the original Led Zeppelin albums are readily available online and they still stand the test of time. Or to put it another way, when you want good Rock, think of Led Zeppelin, not Greta.

Showdown: Homages/Rip Offs 6 - Video Game edition Level 2

Is the title confusing enough for you?
Basically, two years ago I wrote a blog post looking at similarities between 10 Rock/Metal songs and 10 video game tunes whilst offering my opinion on whether the latter piece of music was a knowing wink to the original, a surreptitious copy of an existing track or a pure coincidence. Well, I'm doing another one! I'll also be giving my verdict on which song I believe is better based on personal taste, which came first and which tune sounds more appropriate for its medium.
Listed in each round will be the band and video game franchise, followed by the specific song and level or piece of music from aforementioned video game. I'll try to mention the game and (if I can find the information online) composer for said piece of music. There won't be a Spotify playlist for this as most of the video game tunes won't be available but I will include links to the video game music for you to listen to, if you want to compare as you read.
Time for another brawl!

ROUND ONE: Mega Man vs. Ghost
Dr. Wily's Castle - The theme from the final level of Mega Man 2 (released 1988) was composed by Takashi Tateishi and is considered one of gaming's most iconic themes. It's been remixed countless times by YouTubers and professional video game composers and is a pretty damn awesome piece of a music from a game full of great tunes. The galloping rhythm and melody played throughout is the focus here. Remember how it sounds, although anyone who's heard this tune probably doesn't need to try too hard to recall the melody.
Miasma - This is easily my favourite song off the most recent Ghost album, Prequelle. It's an instrumental featuring heavy riffs, synth melodies and a saxophone solo. However, after the percussion kicks in, we get treated to a guitar solo followed by the synth one. After the synth solo, we get a second guitar solo that contains a galloping riff incredibly similar to the main melody from Dr. Wily's Castle. There are subtle differences but the overwhelming similarities are undeniable. However, it's still an incredible song from what will almost certainly be the best album of the year.
VERDICT - Considering it's one small part of a great song and Ghost don't strike me as a band wanting to cater to old school gamers, I don't think they intentionally copied the theme from Mega Man 2 or intended it as a homage. It's almost certainly coincidence so the question now is which tune do I think is better? It's a hard choice but I'm gonna give the win to Ghost due to the quality of the instrumentation. Full band will always beat 8-bit and that's a fact.

ROUND TWO: Black Sabbath vs. Spider-Man
The Mob Rules - There were two Black Sabbath songs I could've chosen for this blog post but in the end, I went with this one. It's the title track off the band's second album with Ronnie James Dio as the vocalist, notable for its great guitar riff played throughout the song. However, unlike previous entries, we're not just focusing on specific part of the original track here. We're focusing on the riff, the percussion, the pre-chorus melody and the guitar solo.
Boss Theme 3 - This is the third Boss Theme from Spider-Man and Venom: Maximum Carnage for the SNES, released in 1994. Composers Chris Jojo and Tony Williams must've been big fans of 80s Heavy Metal as the comparisons to this tune and the Black Sabbath one stack up more than quite possibly any other example in these video game posts. Quite possibly most shocking of all is that the game doesn't even credit Black Sabbath for pinching their song, although I suppose it's a lot easier to deny plagiarism if you don't own up to it.
VERDICT - Absolutely a rip-off. Not just a rip-off but one done as a shitty MIDI file. The win goes to Black Sabbath for creating the song, making it sound awesome and for not getting due credit...although if it were a fist fight, Spider-Man would definitely win.

ROUND THREE: Surfaris vs. Spongebob Squarepants
Wipe Out - A classic Surf Rock tune with an iconic guitar riff and 12-bar Blues structure. It's also notable for the rolling drumbeat in between the riffs...and the vocal introduction of manic laughter followed by the words "wipe out", although we don't need to worry about that here. If the name of the song or band wasn't a dead giveaway, the sound should immediately make you think of surfing and having fun on the beach. It's a summer hit and the fact that it's mostly instrumental means it's easy to rework for video games.
Goo Lagoon - The beach level from Spongebob Squarepants: Battle For Bikini Bottom, a 3D platformer with music composed by Jimmy Levine. As I mentioned before, it's easy to be inspired by instrumental Surf Rock when writing video game music set on a beach where people surf (and presumably rock) so it's no real surprise that there are elements of "Wipe Out" here. Whilst it's not the most overt homage, the signs are definitely there.
VERDICT - I mean, I've already told you, haven't I? It's clearly a homage as none of the main riffs are directly lifted and the Blues chord progression is so damn common that it would be ridiculous to accuse Jimmy Levine of stealing the idea from "Wipe Out". That being said, I'm giving the win to Surfaris. I'd rather listen to "Wipe Out" than the Goo Lagoon level music, although I don't dislike it. The game actually has a colourful collection of fun tunes to listen to.

ROUND FOUR: Duran Duran vs. Double Dragon
Girls On Film - One of Duran Duran's biggest hits with a catchy chorus and, more importantly, intro riff. The guitar chords and their progression are key here, as that's what we'll be comparing. It's not a favourite of mine, even as far as 80s Pop Rock goes, but I don't hate the song. It's passable but it's no "Hungry Like The Wolf" or "Rio", that's for damn sure.
Intro Theme - The intro to Battletoads & Double Dragon for the SNES contains a similar sounding guitar riff despite being released in 1992, about 11 years after the Duran Duran single. Composer David Wise has acknowledged similarities to other 80s Pop Rock in his compositions (such as using the same equipment as "In The Air Tonight" - Phil Collins during a level from Donkey Kong Country 2, I believe) so this riff might be a little more than coincidence.
VERDICT - I think there may have been a cheeky bit of intentional or unintentional riff pinching going on, as this game seems to have very little to do with "Girls On Film" - Duran Duran so I can't see it being a homage or pure coincidence. Whilst the original song did come up with the riff over a decade before the game, I'm giving the win to Double Dragon as I prefer the heavier sound to it. If it was rerecorded with modern instruments, it'd definitely be the better tune.

ROUND FIVE: Alice In Chains vs. Doom
Them Bones - I've never been a big fan of Alice In Chains and the few songs of theirs that I generally enjoy listening to tend to need some form of modification (e.g. speeding up "Man In The Box" 25%) but I still know and admire aspects of this song. The guitar riff is heavy and evil, slowly ascending before plummeting back down again. It's the main riff and chorus that we're paying attention to for this comparison.
Bye Bye American Pie - Despite having spookier accompanying instruments and a less polished sound than the full band sound of Alice In Chains, the chords are seemingly identical in this piece of music from Doom 2 released just two years after "Them Bones". Composer Robert Prince didn't even credit Alice In Chains for this song either, another reason why I believe this is less of a homage and more of the other one.
VERDICT - This is another song that I reckon was a bit of a rip-off considering how similar it is without even crediting the original songwriters. However, if I had to choose which one I think fits its chosen medium better (90s Grunge vs. spooky song in FPS), I prefer the quality of the video game song. It sounds grittier and doesn't contain annoying vocals so the win goes to Doom.

ROUND SIX: Tina Turner vs. Super Smash Bros
Nutbush City Limits (The 90s Version) - Most people probably know the punchier version of this song from the 70s but in 1991, Tina Turner rerecorded this track with a slower tempo and a heavier emphasis on piano. The opening piano chords followed by the Dance Pop synthetic percussion and musical effects might sound familiar to Nintendo fans, as we'll discuss in a moment, but they also turn this song firmly into a Pop track. I debated including it here due to it not being a Rock song but hey, when you hear what I'm comparing it to, you'll understand why it needed talking about.
Targets! - Yep, the Target Smash song from Super Smash Bros. Melee sounds JUST like the 90s version of "Nutbush City Limits", what with the identical piano chords and synth accompaniments. Granted this tune is a little faster and has more guitar in it but it's pretty damn similar all the same. As the tracks progress, more differences emerge but the opening does all the damage necessary in my eyes.
VERDICT - I doubt composer Hirokazu Ando listened to Tina Turner before whacking out this tune so I'm chalking it up to coincidence rather than homage or rip-off. As for which song is better, I'm giving the win to Super Smash Bros simply because I have fond memories of Target Smash (and the Home Run Contest) thanks to this tune. Since it's a coincidence, I have no need to award Tina Turner the win for coming up with the song first and since it's a Dance Pop song instead of a Rock one, I'm not overly fond of the track itself. An easy decision.

ROUND SEVEN: Glenn Frey vs. P.O.W. - Prisoners Of War
The Heat Is On - The classic 80s Pop Rock tune with the saxophone riff and the awesome chorus, notable for its use in Beverly Hills Cop. However, since then it's earned the right to stand up on its own feet via radio play and use in other media. It might not be the most badass 80s Pop Rock song in existence but it doesn't need to be. It's fast, it's catchy and it's got a consistent rhythm that's perfect for car chases and whatever kind of antics you're bound to get into listening to this song.
Boss Battle 2 - Let's face it; not many readers here will know the game P.O.W. - Prisoners Of War on the NES from 1988 (a popular year in this blog post) but some gamers online have made the connection between the Glenn Frey single and a particular melody from the second boss battle theme in this game. It might not be the main focus of the tune but when it crops up, you know damn well that it was lifted from "The Heat Is On". I'm not sure which composer out of Kazuhiro Nishida, Toshikazu Tanaka and Yoko Osaka decided to borrow this melody but the deed has been done.
VERDICT - Definitely Glenn Frey. Whilst the tune in P.O.W. - Prisoners Of War is cute, it doesn't hold a candle to the 80s classic.

ROUND EIGHT: Pink Floyd vs. Rayman
Shine On You Crazy Diamond - This is a long-ass song that has multiple different musical sections but this Prog Rock epic by overrated Prog Rock outfit Pink Floyd contains a slow, four note guitar riff around the four minute mark. It also contains plenty of moody, atmospheric background noise that you usually hear during ambient sections in video games...but it's mostly the four guitar notes we're interested in.
The Bayou - Along with being one of the best 3D platformers in existence, Rayman 2: The Great Escape also contains a level with a long piece of music featuring moody, atmospheric background noise and four guitar notes played in a similar fashion. Composer Eric Chevalier has supposedly been inspired by other bands in his work before but I wouldn't be surprised if Pink Floyd was on that list too.
VERDICT - I don't think this was a rip-off or a homage, as the two pieces of music stand apart more than they stand together. However, I do think it's likely that Eric Chevalier was unintentionally inspired by Pink Floyd and composed a piece of music containing a similar riff. I'm giving the win to Rayman for creating a) the better assortment of creepy music and b) the shorter song.

ROUND NINE: Crash Bandicoot vs. Rob Zombie
The Eel Deal (Hidden) - In Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back, there are hidden sections in the sewer levels (The Eel Deal, Sewer Or Later and Hangin' Out) that have a thick, heavy bass riffing and percussion effects that sound a little like a clanging piano, not to mention the Techno sound of musical accompaniments. The comparison I'm going to make with the Industrial sound of this tune composed by Mutato Muzika might be a little bit forced but try to stick with me.
Never Gonna Stop (The Red Red Kroovy) - Rob Zombie is known for heavy Industrial music but the section that plays when Rob starts singing reminded me of the music from Crash Bandicoot, particularly the piano melody. As I said before, it's not quite as clear-cut as previous comparisons I've made and whilst there isn't a specific riff or melody that's been copied, it's more about the general sound of the song in comparison to the music from Crash Bandicoot.
VERDICT - Neither a homage or rip-off, absolutely a coincidence. Rob Zombie might be aware of Crash Bandicoot in some way or another but his song sounds closer to his own style of music than a hidden tune from a 90s video game. I'm gonna give the win to Rob Zombie for this one as I prefer his song to this specific tune from Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back, although on the whole I definitely prefer the music in Crash to the music on a Rob Zombie album.

ROUND TEN: Friendship vs. Mario
Let's Not Talk About It - This little known track from 1979 contains a piano riff that fans of gaming (or just anyone who's been alive within the last 20 years) will almost certainly recognise straight away. There's nothing else you need to know, just that this contains a series of notes played in a curiously specific way that sounds exactly like...
Underground Theme - ...the Underground Theme from Super Mario Bros! Video game legend Koji Kondo composed the classic melody which has stuck with the Mario series ever since it was first released in 1985. However, even though it contains a different string of notes after the initial six, the tune is identical and it's enough for me to raise an eyebrow at the very least.
VERDICT - There's no way Nintendo intended the Underground Theme to be a homage to a 70s band nobody heard of and whilst most people would consider it a coincidence, I also think there's a small possibility that Koji could've heard "Let's Not Talk About It" in passing and figured it was the perfect match for the game he was working on. That being said, I'm awarding the win to Mario as the Underground Theme has become one of Nintendo's iconic tunes and even if it was pinched from a lesser known Rock song, Nintendo certainly used the track in the better way.


COMING SOON (as in, within a month or so): A series of posts about the music from Spyro The Dragon and the Spyro: Reignited Trilogy, similar to ones I wrote about the Crash Bandicoot: N. Sane Trilogy last year.