Here Is The News: 2019 Edition, part 1

It's been a while since I brought you guys a fresh, hot heaping of the music news so to make up for it, I've got a whole bunch of stories consisting of highlights from the past year. Some may be a little fresher than others but that's totally not because I wrote this all over a couple of days towards the end of the year. No, this is a proper news anthology!
Anyway, because there are so many stories to collect, I've split them across a couple of blog posts to make it easier to read (and for me to write). Here's the first; enjoy!

OZZY OSBOURNE OFFERS "MYSTERY BOX" TICKETS FOR UPCOMING TOUR

Heavy Metal revenant Ozzy Osbourne has recently announced not only a brand new album and supporting tour consisting of new and "Crazy Train" inspired material but also an exclusive style of tickets known as "Mystery Box" tickets to replace the standard kind offered with 99% of other gigs.

The new ticket system was announced shortly after Ozzy (pictured left) got his 10th entry stamp punched at Birmingham City Hospital, earning him a free colonoscopy with the purchase of anything from the gift shop. According to his website, the Mystery Box ticket entitles you to "admission to an upcoming Ozzy Osbourne show where the contents of said box will be revealed an hour before the show is scheduled to start". The box could contain a vacuum cleaner, a holiday abroad or even an Ozzy Osbourne show, but fans won't know until shortly before the date of the concert.

When asked why the Mystery Box system was implemented in favour of a more traditional system where you buy a ticket and go to see a show, Ozzy Osbourne's doctor and interim tour manager replied "Ozzy's health has to come first. At this point in time, he's in no condition to be standing on stage shouting "Come ooooon!" and "Go fucking crazyyyyyyy!" for 90 minutes". He went on to say that once Ozzy's fully recovered, he'll be able to leave the hospital and play as many shows as he can before returning to the ward.

Band succubus/manager Sharon Osbourne issued a press  release stating "Ozzy cannot wait to get back on the road again. There's nothing this 71-year old wants more than to travel all over the planet with younger and hairier musicians rambling his way through all the same songs he's been performing for decades" shortly before having to retreat into her stasis chamber in time to avoid the sunlight. The following evening, she went on to cackle Mystery Box tickets are non-refundable and that the box not containing an Ozzy Osbourne show is a risk people who purchase Ozzy Osbourne tickets on this current tour have to take (as stated in the terms and conditions printed on the underside of the box).

Whilst the Rock & Metal community are all wishing Ozzy a speedy recovery, many spectators are beginning to doubt that Ozzy will ever play a proper show again. Dr. Richard Mayhew, ageing musician specialist, recently claimed "All those years of being rad have finally caught up with him. I'd be surprised if he makes it to the end of this sentence, let alone decade". Whatever happens, at least Ozzy's still making money which will almost certainly go towards an incredible headstone.

WARM-UP ROCK BAND BREAKS UNWRITTEN RULE

An up & coming Rock band called Kiss The Fist have shocked audience members at their latest gig by neglecting to play a slow Bluesy number in the middle of their set. Instead of slowing down the entire pace of the evening, they continued to play enjoyable Rock music to the horror of everyone attending the show.

The UK band were warming up for Collective Soul (not pictured left) with a series of energetic Hard Rock tracks, each containing catchy riffs and well crafted solos. However, after three songs and scattered applause, the band continued with another heavy riff-based Rock number in favour of a slow-tempo smokey B-side. Initially, fans weren't bothered as nobody knew the exact setlist of the gig, not even the bassist. Panic among the crowd only set in after Kiss The Fist (possibly picture left) exited the stage, making it painfully clear that the band had no intentional of bringing the lively atmosphere down with a tepid Blues track at all.

Audience members were outraged, some tweeting "Uhhhh, where's the unnecessary Blues Rock song, guys?" and "I CAN'T BELIEVE  I PAID GOOD MONEY NOT TO HEAR A 5 MINUTE BLUES TRACK! I DEMAND A REFUND AND AN #APOLOGY" but most others showed more restraint and a better understanding of how to use hashtags.

When asked about the evening, Collective Soul vocalist Derek Soul (pictured somewhere) stated "I had no idea they were going to pull such an offensive stunt. Everyone knows that the lengthy Blues Rock song on the warm-up band's setlist is there for a reason. When else are people going to casually talk among themselves or go for a pint & a piss? We apologise to everyone who attended the show and hope this doesn't dissuade you from remembering our stuff from the 90s like "Heavy" and "Shine"". Derek went on to mention "Gel" too.

Kiss The Fist have been unavailable for comment but sources close to the band believe the Blues Rock filler was omitted due to time constraints and what can only be described as "a fundamental lack of having a Blues song in their discography". As for whether this excuse will stand up, only time and Wikipedia will tell.

WORLD'S FIRST PROCEDURALLY GENERATED ROCK BAND CREATED; MUSE OUTRAGED

Computer programmers and musical scientists have joined together to create the first artificial intelligence capable of writing and playing Rock music to an acceptable degree of quality. Developed over the course of eight years by leading scientists and musical theorists, Artificial Interface Capable Of Making Rock Music (or AICOMRM for short) was unveiled to a crowd of tech and music journalists approximately four hours before one of the programmers thought of a much better acronym.

According to cynical but invested bloggers, the aim of AICOMRM is to "expand the human understanding of awesome Rock songs in a needlessly expensive and probably self-destructive way". However, according to the developers, AICOMRM will give humans insight into undiscovered melodies and help expand creativity by giving us all the answers before we can discover them ourselves. Whilst many trendy intellectuals are excited by this breakthrough, some refuse to be as happy.

Composers of the Impending Apocalypse and occasional Rock band Muse are among those who are both alarmed and infuriated by the invention of AICOMRM. When asked about their stance on procedurally generated Rock music, frontman Matt Bellamy replied "I hate it. It's so insulting that people are giving so much attention to artificial Rock music now when we've been making it for over a decade. When an algorithm generates simplistic, uninteresting guitar riffs that sort of sound like existing Rock riffs and a bunch of noisy synth shit over the top, everyone goes crazy but when we do it, the Internet can't bitch quick enough".

Matt Bellamy (pictured right and centre) went on to say that in their quest to experiment and push artistic boundaries, Muse opted to release procedurally generated music instead of traditionally crafted Rock songs for their 2009 album The Resistance. Despite being met with criticism, Muse decided to continue this trend with the albums The 2nd Law, Drones and Simulation Theory, allowing them to focus their creative efforts on elaborate stage shows and building various robots designed to bring things to Matt Bellamy such as guitars and blunderbusses.

AICOMRM is expected to release its first album within the next year and Muse are expected to boycott it. It's unknown whether it will rebel against its creators and decide to exterminate all Rock music off the face of the planet like the way these things usually go but bookies are currently operating 5-1 odds on "We're all doomed". When asked about his thoughts on the future of mankind after the invention of AICOMRM, Matt Bellamy commented "I have absolutely no opinion on this".

[INSERT BAND HERE] UNHAPPY ABOUT [INSERT POLITICIAN HERE]'S USE OF THEIR MUSIC

Once again, [INSERT POLITICIAN HERE] has used a song from the 1970s in one of their campaign videos or tours and yep, you guessed it, the band whose song it is aren't happy in the slightest. No sir, they definitely aren't peachy about this one. Hoo boy, this sure is one humdinger of a situation right here.

The [INSERT BAND HERE] song was something to do with adversity or not giving up or maybe even something about being powerful and (get this, right?) it transpires that the political party of [INSERT POLITICIAN HERE] didn't actually clear the use of the song with [INSERT BAND HERE] first. They just went ahead and used it to further their own political party. Can you imagine that?! This isn't the first time this has happened either, it's a right catastrophe! There's no way for anyone to prevent something like this happening at all. Nope, absolutely nothing anyone can do...or is there?

[INSERT BAND HERE] have taken strong steps to ensure a horrific crime of art and selfishness like this never happens again. [INSERT BAND HERE] have written an incredibly strongly worded letter to [INSERT POLITICIAN HERE] along with a statement on their official Facebook page condemning the use of [INSERT APPROPRIATE SIGNATURE SONG HERE] in [INSERT POLITICIAN HERE]'s rally.

The statement reads "We, the members of [INSERT BAND HERE] did not approve of or grant permission for [INSERT POLITICIAN HERE] to use our song, [INSERT APPROPRIATE SIGNATURE SONG HERE], during their latest political rally. We do not agree with his politics and do not wish for our music to be associated with him or his political party. We ask that [INSERT POLITICIAN HERE] refrains from using [INSERT APPROPRIATE SIGNATURE SONG HERE] or any other songs we've released during the course of their political career or we will be forced to take further action in the form of yet another strongly worded letter and overly formal statement on our social media page".

As for whether [INSERT POLITICIAN HERE] will take any notice of this, it's literally impossible to tell right now. There is no way of knowing if [INSERT POLITICIAN HERE] or indeed any other politician will use an unlicensed song by [INSERT BAND HERE] or any other 1970s band as they enter the stage during one of their political rallies, an online political video or [INSERT HILARIOUS THIRD OPTION HERE].

MOTLEY CRUE ATTEMPT WORLD RECORD FOR LONGEST SUSTAINED PERIOD OF MASTURBATION

80s Hair Metal legends Motley Crue are about to enter the fifth consecutive year of collectively masturbating without any sign of actually ejaculating in the foreseeable future. The band begun their prolonged act of self-copulation in January 2014 after announcing that they would embark on a year-long farewell tour in 2015.

The band continued to publicly touch themselves by holding a press conference whereby they took part in a "cessation of touring" agreement, resulting in the formation of a legally binding contract that would prevent any and all of them from touring past the year 2015 under the name Motley Crue. After finishing their Final Tour at the end of 2015, many fans and music journalists assumed the band would finally shoot their load and disappear into the night to wash their hands and fall asleep like most people do after firing their loads. However, after appearing in radio interviews and some minor TV appearances, members of the band went on to confirm that a biopic based on the band's group autobiography "The Dirt" was in the works, suggesting that the band had no intention of releasing their gurt just yet.

"The Dirt" was released to moderate acclaim in March 2019, along with some newly recorded material by the band still vigorously flogging their dolphins for the fourth year running. When asked about whether this had any impact on the Motley Crue's brief but sudden increase in popularity around the start of the year, none of the band could comment as they were all too busy sniffing wads of cash to help sustain their bruised and blistered erections.

Regardless of whether it was due to the biopic or not, Motley Crue showed no signs of entering the vinegar strokes any time soon after they announced that they were just mucking about when they all signed a legally binding cessation of touring contract. Whilst some fans were unhappy about how much of a big deal the band made over something that turned out to just be part of their masturbation ceremony, many have shown support for Motley Crue over their ability to hold back what has to be an incredibly painful nut at this stage.

To prepare for a 2020 tour with Def Leppard and presumably at least another 12 months of intense onanism, members of the band are taking certain safety precautions such as Vince Neil (pictured above) who recently entered the hospital for hand surgery (No, I'm being serious this time. That's legitimately the reason why he went into hospital, you can fact check it and everything. I mean, this article practically wrote itself after that nugget of news hit the Internet).


That's all for part one! Stay tuned for part two sometime before the end of this decade!

Simulation Theory - Muse

Well this is a first. I'm reviewing a straight-up Pop album!

If there's one thing Muse can do with their music, it's conjure feelings of nostalgia and thoughts about how good music used to be; thoughts like "Remember when Muse used to be a Rock band?" and "Remember when Matt Bellamy's ego was in check?". Simulation Theory is the tragic return to everything that sucks about Muse after the promising dead cat bounce that was Drones. Instead of great riffs on guitar/bass, we get synth-driven toss. Instead of dynamic anthems perfect for arena gigs and radio play for an audience of hungry young Rock fans, we get electronic drumbeats and noise made on some coffee-stained hipster shit's laptop.
Looking at the positives first, album opener "Algorithm" has some decent instrumentation and kicks things off in typical grand fashion for Muse. The electronic sound of the drums, bass and string accompaniments set the tone for the rest of the album too so if you like the song, you'll probably get some joy out of the record. However, for fans who can still remember when Muse wrote songs like "Hysteria", "Supermassive Black Hole" and "Knights Of Cydonia" that actually rocked, this harbinger of the band's switch back to electronic garbage teased in The Resistance and actualised in The 2nd Law won't fill you with any hope.
That's probably the biggest flaw with the album. You can argue that Muse not writing Rock songs is good or bad and that their reliance on 80s nostalgia (right down to the album cover that's more on-the-nose than an army of blackheads) helps or hinders the record but even if you choose the pessimistic route with both of those opinions, you must accept both of these things can work if the music is good and serves a decent purpose. The music and lyrics about hope and fighting back against arseholes in power are supposed to be inspiring for the millions unhappy with the current system but here's the kicker; they fuckin' ain't. A stadium Rock band releasing mainstream Pop is as inspirational as a series of flatlines in a coma ward.

The majority of tracks either resemble a dystopian Sci-Fi's cynical pastiche of what "future music" should sound like or the incidental score of a film/TV show desperate to remind people that 1980s synth music existed. However, there are some positive aspects. "Pressure" is the token fun song with catchy guitar riffs and vocal melodies, much like "Panic Station" on The 2nd Law (which was also the third track on that album too; totally not coordinated at all) and even some of the mediocre or annoying tracks contain elements that could've worked if used properly, like the gritty slide guitar riffs in the laughable Herbie Hancock nightmare "Propaganda".
Muse have acknowledged that this album was heavily inspired by music from the 80s so the Depeche Mode drumbeats ("Blockades") and John Carpenter synth ("The Void") are present without any attempt to mask them. It's admirable that Muse at least attempted to make the material sound unique to them instead of just flat-out copying another band's style but they would've been better off continuing in the direction they were headed with Drones or, at the very least, blending the 80s Pop aspects with heavier Rock ones. Instead, they end up sounding like Coldplay ("Thought Contagion") and Indie Pop bands found exclusively on the iPhone of an Instagram celebrity ("Something Human").
I rate the album 2/10. It doesn't inspire you to rise up against fascism (and if it does, where the fuck have you been for the last two years?!), it contains a collection of music that fails to stick with you unless you love electronic Pop, it sounds like Matt Bellamy regurgitating the same old lyrical shit he's been peddling for over a decade and it does 80s Pop music a disservice by dissecting it for the sole purpose of stapling the still-twitching parts to modern wank like a Frankenstein's monster you actually want to be burnt alive. Regardless of which way you shake it, Simulation Theory is a complete failure.

Taster Session #10

Several months have passed since the last Taster Session post and, sure enough, many more Rock/Metal singles have been released! Funny, that. Anyway, let's look at five new songs for upcoming albums and decide whether or not we want to enjoy the full records based on their singles:

"Devil" - Shinedown         (listen here)

From the album Attention Attention (04/05/18)

I'm slowly getting into Shinedown after listening to a bunch of their albums in one sitting. I definitely prefer their earlier stuff, though. It had more of an edge and pound for pound it felt more like Rock music compared to the stuff on Threat To Survival. "Devil" has the passion and energy but also sounds like something you'd hear at the end of a Transformers film or covered in a singing talent show; safe Rock. I'll probably listen to the album but considering it doesn't sound like Shinedown are reverting back to their earlier sound, I'm not going to get excited about it.

"Waiting For A Sign" - Ritchie Blackmore's Rainbow         (listen here)

From the album ???? (??/??/??)

Wow, the first new Rainbow song in about 22 years!!!

Holy shit, remember Rainbow? "Stargazer", "Kill The King", "Lost In Hollywood". They were an awesome Hard Rock band, I wonder what their new single will sound like?

WAHP WAHP. It sucks!

Yeah, Blackmore's lost it. He had something special and he fucking lost it, the twat. Seriously, listen to this song and get your head around the fact that the guy who laid down all the riffs and solos for the best Deep Purple songs shat out this Bluesy wank that sounds too dull even for Whitesnake. Maybe there'll be a full album and maybe Blackmore will unleash the beast, forcing me to eat my words (I'm not counting the upcoming live collection, by the way), but if this song is any indication, his time is done. But hey, I guess he doesn't think so as he's determined to milk whatever acclaim he can get; remember folks, this isn't just Rainbow. It's Ritchie Blackmore's Rainbow again, a name the band haven't carried since 1975 and have presumably only reclaimed due to the man's unwarranted ego.

"Trouble" - Five Finger Death Punch         (listen here)

From the album And Justice For None (18/05/18)

OK, a bit of explaining needed here. "Trouble" was first released as a track on the band's A Decade Of Destruction compilation album as a new song that will be included on the deluxe edition of their upcoming album, And Justice For None (YO, WE'RE RIFFIN ON METALLICA UP IN THIS BITCH! MAXIMUM FUCKING EDGE, BOOOIIIS). The compilation may have come out already but it's still technically a sample of what's to come in the new album, so it counts! The track's not bad, got some good riffs and guitar melodies throughout. I doubt I'll listen to the album as I couldn't give a fuck about Five Finger Death Punch and their fanbase of angry white teenagers (that was a joke, don't get pissy) but this track's not bad. At least they didn't do the typical American Metal thing of forcing a soft middle section in to show listeners how sensitive they are.

"Burnin'" - Black Stone Cherry         (listen here)

From the album Family Tree (20/04/18)

I don't really have much to say about Black Stone Cherry. Yeah, they're pretty good? Some great songs, some meh ones. Nothing on either extreme, they're just very competent. As for this song...yeah, it's good. Solo sounds a little off; there's a sort of pre-solo bit that's played too high and it sounds terrible but then it sorts itself out. All in all, this is what I've come to expect from Black Stone Cherry and even though it's unlikely that I'll listen to the album, I'm not ruling it out if someone recommends it with unequivocal passion.

"Thought Contagion" - Muse         (listen here)

From the album ???? (??/??/??)

Hey, Muse are back with another single from an unnamed album! This time, they're going for a Coldplay thing along with their brand of synthy Prog shite blended with some 80s guff because nostalgia sells. Between this and their last single, "Dig Down", I am completely drained of excitement for any Muse album release in the near future. I can't remember anything about the last song except I think it sucked and this one definitely doesn't sound like the band are heading in the right direction, considering how awful their last Pop/Electronic based albums were. At least Drones had Rock songs that made it great to listen to.


I might have to write a video game post if I can't think of a better topic before the end of the month. Be warned.

Taster Session #8

Back to the classic format for this posts, I'm afraid. Five new Rock/Metal singles from albums coming out this year with a link for you to sample each track along with my personal verdict.

"Dig Down" - Muse         (listen here)
From the album ???? (??/??/????)

Apparently, this song was written as a way of saying "don't let all the shit that's happening in the world get you down" and what better way of communicating that sentiment than with a terrible song and a step backward for the band's musical quality. Drones had me hopeful that the band were realising they're actually a Rock band instead of a shitty hipster synth outfit but now they've decided to write music off The 2nd Law again. Bland, repetitive WUBWUBWUBs and Matt Bellamy's moaning vocals carry this song because no other fucker's bothering to bring the thunder. On the plus side, it still sounds like Muse at its heart, although not good Muse. Just Muse Muse.


"Run" - Foo Fighters         (listen here)
From the album Concrete And Gold (15/09/17)

So far, we're 0 for 2. The song starts off like your typical sensitive Foos track but once percussion and heavy guitar riffs come in, it turns to shit. Dave's screaming is easily the worst aspect of any Foo Fighters song (not to be confused with his singing or shouting vocals, just when he screeches) and they're used a fair bit throughout the track. The riffing and guitar melodies are incredibly average but then so was everything about "Everlong" and people adore that song for some fucking reason. However, the most disappointing aspect has to be the drumming during the verse. It sounds wrong. It doesn't match the heavy riffs and sounds like the kind of percussion you'd hear in a shitty football anthem, not Hard Rock single for one of the biggest modern Rock bands on the planet.


"Must Be Nice" - Nickelback         (listen here)
From the album Feed The Machine (16/07/17)

My Nickelback policy is simple. If it sucks, it sucks. If it rocks, it rocks. "How You Remind Me" sucks. "Burn It To The Ground" rocks. This song rocks. Great riffs, sweet solo, steady rhythm, typical Rock song structure. It's not exactly the band pushing any boundaries and the vocal delivery in the verse is a little off-putting with repeat listens but if you want a solid Rock song, this is a good track to listen to. On a side note, that album cover is pretty fucking cool too. If it didn't have Nickelback at the top, more people would probably pick it up. Finally, a song I enjoyed and would want to hear again!


"Great Heathen Army" - Iced Earth         (listen here)
From the album Incorruptible (16/06/17)

Gotta love that chanting, although the intro does go on a bit long. I haven't discussed Iced Earth much (if at all) on the blog but if you like your Metal fast and heavy, check them out. I think the easiest comparison would be Slayer mixed with Iron Maiden but you could probably apply that to any American Metal band that doesn't rely on their sensitivity to pad songs. The music's a little dull and mostly serves as background noise for the vocals here, which goes against traditional Metal values but at least it isn't crap. It's just a bit meh, which is a shame as I had high hopes for this band's new material.


"Paranoiac Personality" - Alice Cooper         (listen here)
From the album Paranormal (28/07/17)

Now, see, THIS is proper Heavy Metal! It reminds me of "Believer" - Ozzy Osbourne with the bassline at the start but the riffs are a lot better than whatever Randy Rhoads was doing. It's a decent Rock song, although I'm hoping the outro doesn't just cut out like that on the album. Based on this track, I'd be tempted to give the rest of the album a listen, as I don't believe I've ever actually sat and listened to a full Alice Cooper album from start to finish before. I've tried to sit through a couple but gave up part way through. Anyway, good song!


Coming soon: a Showdown post featuring Halestorm covers and their originals!

Tenology: Songs That Sound Better When Sped Up

Bonus Post!
This is to make up for the week I missed in March and I figure you might want to read this short little post over a random video game one.

Recently, I learned that you can speed up or slow down videos on Youtube so naturally, I gave several slower songs a listen with the speed increased to 1.25x. Many tracks didn't work at all but surprisingly, quite a few songs actually sounded pretty awesome when sped up slightly.
I've created a playlist of some of these songs on Youtube but the problem with keeping track of things via Youtube (especially when it's a music playlist) is that videos get deleted quite frequently. As a result, I've chosen to list ten of my favourite sped up songs here so that I can find them again even if some prick deletes them off Youtube.
If you have any suggestions for songs that'd sound just as good (or arguably better) when sped up, let me know in the comments or via Twitter. Also, feel free to let me know if any of the embedded Youtube videos get removed and I need to replace them.

WARNING! YOU MAY NEED A COUPLE OF LISTENS TO THE ORIGINAL/SLOWER VERSIONS OF THESE SONGS IF YOU EVER WANT TO HEAR THEM THE SAME AGAIN!


1. "Night Moves" - Bob Seger
(wait until the drums come in, it sounds like The Doobie Brothers)




2. "Sweet Child O' Mine" - Guns N' Roses
(I finally found a way to fix Axl's voice...sort of)




3. "Man In The Box" - Alice In Chains
(less Alice In Chains, more Velvet Revolver. I love it!)




4. "Nothing Else Matters" - Metallica
(it almost sounds like a Christmas song or sea-shanty, SO much better!)




5. "Bad Company" - Bad Company
(it may not sound less powerful and more...broadway, but it sounds alright enough for this list)




6. "Everything About You" - Ugly Kid Joe
(the Poison vibe is strong with this one!)




7. "Time Is Running Out" - Muse
(I can imagine a band like Paramore rocking a sped up cover of this)




8. "(Don't Fear) The Reaper" - Blue Oyster Cult
(obviously I prefer the original but it's cool to hear this song if covered by The Ventures)




9. "Crazy Train" - Ozzy Osbourne
(the rest of the song is kinda...yeah...but at least the riff sounds cooler!)




10. "Do You Feel Like We Do?" - Peter Frampton
(closest I can get to creating a studio version of the Frampton Comes Alive version, although shame about the Disco sound)




Honourable Mentions

"Green Tinted Sixties Mind" - Mr. Big
"Jump" - Van Halen
"Hot Blooded" - Foreigner
"Rosalie" - Thin Lizzy
"Dead Leaves And The Dirty Ground" - The White Stripes*
"Don't Stop Believing" - Journey
"The Zoo" - Scorpions
"Same Old Song And Dance" - Aerosmith


Thanks for reading/listening! I'll see if I can find something to review either next week or the week after.


* Fun fact! You can hear Meg White changing the tempo between 1:28-1:34 due to being a shit drummer a lot clearer when everything's sped up.

Tenology: My Ten Favourite Rock/Metal Songs Of 2015

Well, here we are. Just over a week into 2016 and so far, nothing feels that different (apart from the crushing absence of Lemmy). Rather than look at some of the albums that I didn't get a chance to listen to last year, I'm kicking things off the same I did last January; a list of 10 songs I loved from 2015, along with a few Honourable Mentions.
I suppose I should mention that any of the songs released in the last year that were included in the previous Taster Session post will be omitted from here, although it's safe to say I loved them. You may also find that several tracks listed here have been mentioned in other posts on this blog, although I'll try to stick to newer ones. As always, my Tenology posts are generally opinion based and these songs reflect what I enjoyed listening to throughout the year. I haven't listed them in order of greatness but you'll probably be able to tell which ones I favoured more than others from my write-up of each song.
It's also worth mentioning that there are bound to be several songs from 2015 that I will really like but have yet to listen to, so if you've got any recommendations then feel free to list them. Anyway, time to start another 2015 countdown!


1. "Cirice" - Ghost B.C.

Yes, I did mention this in a separate Taster Session post and yes, I still like it now as much as I did when I first wrote that. I should've listened to the whole album by now although I seem to recall this band releasing a song called "If You Have Ghosts" which is fucking terrible. I don't know what the original sounds like but it was almost enough for me to completely write off this band, as it sounds less like a Metal anthem and more like a generic Foo Fighters track. However, if you've heard that shitty cover and agree with me then you should know that this song is enough to make you forgive them.


2. "Cold, Clear Light" - Johnny Blazes And The Pretty Boys

OK, I talked about this one a little bit on the blog too. Basically, it's a great Blues track with a semi-decent couple of solos and an incredibly catchy melody. It's also very fun to play on Rock Band, if that kind of thing appeals to you. I'm not sure if the album this comes from (Soul Vernacular) is available on iTunes yet but if you want to buy this track, they have a Bandcamp where you can support them.


3. "Fire And Ice" - FM

Finally, a new song to talk about! I never really got into FM's earlier material but last year, they released another comeback album that actually contained many great tracks such as "Cold Hearted", "Diggin' Up The Dirt" and "Life Is A Highway". However, my favourite off Heroes And Villains is easily "Fire And Ice", a tune which borrows the piano refrain from Joe Cocker's "Woman To Woman" at the start but eventually breaks into its own song after the drums kick in. Definitely an underrated tune from 2015 in my books.


4. "Flying" - The Answer

Aaaand back to tracks already mentioned on the blog, specifically in my review of Raise A Little Hell - The Answer. I didn't spend much time talking about this song, as it was a bonus track on a deluxe edition, but I reckon it was probably my favourite new song by the band. It's a great driving song and deserved a spot on the main tracklist although I guess the band couldn't charge extortionate prices for three new songs if they weren't very good ones now, could they?


5. "High Country" - The Sword

As well as reviewing the new album released in August, I discussed this track in particular on yet another Taster Session post. It's not as heavy as some of their better known material but it's got some powerful riffs (including one that's a wee bit close to a certain Audioslave track) and I still enjoy listening to it. It's probably my favourite tune off the album too so it definitely belongs on this list.


6. "Nearly Forgot My Broken Heart" - Chris Cornell

Another album I should probably check out after the rest. There's a strange sort of fairytale sound to this song thanks to the pizzicato strings and mandolin intro, two things you wouldn't expect to hear in a Rock song. However, Chris Cornell pulls through and creates a song that's both memorable and better after multiple listens. If you haven't heard this song yet, don't expect it to sound like Soundgarden 2 or even Soundgarden Lite, unless Soundgarden went through a soft Alternative Rock phase I'm unaware of.


7. "New Day Rising" - Von Hertzen Brothers

Possibly my favourite song of the year but only in single edit form as the album version goes on a bit too long. Great riffs, awesome vocals, good use of dynamics and I bet it fucking slays when performed live too. I know a few other tracks by this band and I like them too so maybe I should give an album of theirs a listen. If you like this song and want another track to check out, try "Insomniac".


8. "Open Fire" - The Darkness

If you like The Cult or the song "Hooks In You" - Marillion, you'll want to give this track a listen. I talked about it briefly in my review of the album Last Of Our Kind but one thing I can officially confirm is that this album (and this song) helped get me into The Darkness. At first, I couldn't stand the falsetto vocals but "Open Fire" focuses more on the guitar riffs and less on screeching every line. There's a bit of falsetto in the chorus but it fits in well with the rest of the song, unlike others where it just sounds forced. Definitely one of my favourite songs by the band as well as favourites of 2015!


9. "Reapers" - Muse

I was tempted to review Drones - Muse but ended up tweeting my thoughts about it instead. In short, it's a good album but there are still traces of Matt Bellamy's inflated ego littered throughout. However, one of the album highlights is the track "Reapers" which I suspect was originally meant to be the album's title track before they decided to change it to some wanky album outro. A top notch riff reminiscent of "Still Of The Night" - Whitesnake and some great guitar work too. The only downside is the unnecessary outro that sounds a bit like the end of "Blinded In Chains" - Avenged Sevenfold.


10. "Speed Of Light" - Iron Maiden

I may be ending the list on another track I've already discussed twice but goddamn, it's a strong track. Lyrically, it may not fit in with the album's main concepts but as far as singles go, it was enough to get me excited for their new album. At first, I wasn't sure about Bruce's vocals but those doubts were easily extinguished after multiple listens.

Before you tell me that I've missed a song or that one of those tracks doesn't belong on the list, here are some tracks that didn't quite make the cut but were still decent.


"Breakaway" - Inglorious

It's hardly one of the bigger songs of 2015 but among all the comeback albums and surprise singles, this track stood out for me. It's got a great riff, a driving rhythm and some solid vocals too although I wouldn't rate it in the top ranks of my favourite or even highly enjoyable songs. It's mediocre by Hard Rock standards but good for a few listens every now and then, thus making it into my Honourable Mentions.


"Demolition Man" - Razzmattazz

I reviewed the album this came from on the blog as well so that's probably the best place to go if you want to know more about this band. However, this is the song that introduced me to it and for another AC/DC tribute act, these guys definitely bring a punch worthy of the Honourable Mentions section.


"Martyr" - Last In Line

I haven't talked about these guys on the blog yet because I only found out about them a few weeks ago. Basically, Vivian Campbell (Dio & Def Leppard guitarist) has put together a supergroup named after Dio's second album and they'll hopefully be releasing an album entitled Heavy Crown this year. It's something that caught my attention because I seem to recall all the band members being pretty respectable musicians. However, out of both tracks they've released, this is probably the superior recording and even then it's not great. I'll keep an ear out for Heavy Crown but in case I forget, I thought I should mention it here too.


"Orphan" - Toto

I've been waiting to find another great Rock track from Toto for ages (ignoring "Hold The Line" and "Africa", of course) and these guys must have heard me. Unlike some of their more Pop or Prog oriented tracks, "Orphan" definitely belongs to the Rock genre and considering it was released over 30 years after the peak of their career, it's still as strong as their signature songs to me. If I had to expand this list of my favourite songs from 2015, I reckon this would be number 11.


"Sean" - Foo Fighters

In case you missed it, Dave Grohl and his backing band decided to release a 5-song EP of Foos tracks entitled Saint Cecilia that had been unassigned to previous albums but written throughout their career. Since they released it for free without any hype, I wasn't exactly expecting much. However, two tracks ended up on my phone after I listened to the whole EP (the other one being "The Neverending Sigh") and I would recommend listening to it if you preferred the Foo Fighters before they got all shouty and angry. It's a little bit short for it to make it onto the main list but it's still my favourite off the EP.

Next week, I'll try to review one of the albums released towards the end of last year. Either that or something to do with video games, depends on how much time I have.